Opinions about boundaries in relationships?

What are you personal boundaries and how did they come up in conversation?

A little backstory..

My [F 24] new bf [M 31] and I started dating a few months ago until I found out through a mutual friend that he had his ex gf still living with him. I was immediately turned off, as I personally feel that it should have been up to me to decide if I was comfortable enough pursuing someone in a situation that was still sticky.

Fast forward a month later and we rekindled and eventually made things official. She has since moved out. Since we have been dating, I feel like her name comes up weekly. Now I do not care if people are civil or friends with their exes, but I do feel weekly contact is unnecessary and disrespectful. She has been snap chatting him selfies and from what he tells me weekly.

I feel like I have told him over and over that it bothers me that her name keeps coming up, yet things don't seem to change. Not to mention they went out for dinner and drinks and he did not tell me about it till he was out to meet her.

Am I overreacting for telling him I am uncomfortable with the constant contact with her and to delete her off of snap chat? (From my knowledge he happily deleted her)

I also feel like this issue has taken the excitement out of the relationship for me. How do I get past that feeling?

TD;LR Bf still in contact with ex and it makes me uncomfortable. Are my boundaries reasonable?



Submitted April 05, 2019 at 07:35PM

What are you personal boundaries and how did they come up in conversation?A little backstory..My [F 24] new bf [M 31] and I started dating a few months ago until I found out through a mutual friend that he had his ex gf still living with him. I was immediately turned off, as I personally feel that it should have been up to me to decide if I was comfortable enough pursuing someone in a situation that was still sticky.Fast forward a month later and we rekindled and eventually made things official. She has since moved out. Since we have been dating, I feel like her name comes up weekly. Now I do not care if people are civil or friends with their exes, but I do feel weekly contact is unnecessary and disrespectful. She has been snap chatting him selfies and from what he tells me weekly.I feel like I have told him over and over that it bothers me that her name keeps coming up, yet things don't seem to change. Not to mention they went out for dinner and drinks and he did not tell me about it till he was out to meet her.Am I overreacting for telling him I am uncomfortable with the constant contact with her and to delete her off of snap chat? (From my knowledge he happily deleted her)I also feel like this issue has taken the excitement out of the relationship for me. How do I get past that feeling?TD;LR Bf still in contact with ex and it makes me uncomfortable. Are my boundaries reasonable?
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