Advice before going to the next level please

An awful title for my first reddit post I know! I’m (M45) and my wife (F38). We have two kids and have a great sex life that has grown throughout our 20 years together, even though we are quite different in our outlook on sex. I’m very open about my sexuality (straight) and comfortable with talking about sex with her, she gets embarrassed talking about it, and isn’t as open as myself but we both really enjoy sex and have a really healthy active sex life. We are far from prudish with each other in bed but she’ll never talk about sex before or afterwards and gets embarrassed if I make a comment overly sexual - and this is one of the things I truly love about her, she’s a classy lady who doesn’t get dragged down to my typical male level! So today i got a new job, and she suggested we get take out for dinner and was there anything else I wanted. I cheekily sent some suggestive emojis hinting how about a bit of kinky sex tonight. I got a thumbs up, so I sent back something along the lines of “great answer, how about finally (finger emoji) in (back emoji) (door emoji)?” And got a thumbs up. This is pretty huge for us, not the implication of the act - more the willingness to share a “yes” with me. We’ve messed around in that area before and she’s always enjoyed touching / licking but she has always insisted nothing goes inside. I’m good with that, i had a girlfriend who was a butt freak so I’ve no hang ups on wanting it with someone I truly love and respect - for me sex isn’t good if she doesn’t enjoy it.

And that’s the reason for this post - I know my wife enjoys that area stimulated, it’s not she won’t admit it it’s she just doesn’t have to to me. I just don’t wanna fuck up. If she’s got this idea of what a finger will feel like and I mess up, she’s far less likely to surprise me with any sexual communication. So, good people of reddit - any ideas?



Submitted April 05, 2019 at 06:21PM

An awful title for my first reddit post I know! I’m (M45) and my wife (F38). We have two kids and have a great sex life that has grown throughout our 20 years together, even though we are quite different in our outlook on sex. I’m very open about my sexuality (straight) and comfortable with talking about sex with her, she gets embarrassed talking about it, and isn’t as open as myself but we both really enjoy sex and have a really healthy active sex life. We are far from prudish with each other in bed but she’ll never talk about sex before or afterwards and gets embarrassed if I make a comment overly sexual - and this is one of the things I truly love about her, she’s a classy lady who doesn’t get dragged down to my typical male level! So today i got a new job, and she suggested we get take out for dinner and was there anything else I wanted. I cheekily sent some suggestive emojis hinting how about a bit of kinky sex tonight. I got a thumbs up, so I sent back something along the lines of “great answer, how about finally (finger emoji) in (back emoji) (door emoji)?” And got a thumbs up. This is pretty huge for us, not the implication of the act - more the willingness to share a “yes” with me. We’ve messed around in that area before and she’s always enjoyed touching / licking but she has always insisted nothing goes inside. I’m good with that, i had a girlfriend who was a butt freak so I’ve no hang ups on wanting it with someone I truly love and respect - for me sex isn’t good if she doesn’t enjoy it.And that’s the reason for this post - I know my wife enjoys that area stimulated, it’s not she won’t admit it it’s she just doesn’t have to to me. I just don’t wanna fuck up. If she’s got this idea of what a finger will feel like and I mess up, she’s far less likely to surprise me with any sexual communication. So, good people of reddit - any ideas?
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