I have read the faq. It seems pretty strict about “if you’ve ever looked at a stranger and thought hey they’re hot you are not ace/demi/gray” August 22, 2020 at 11:59PM

I think it's only canon in the series, but since there are a lot of things that have been changed I think it's a nice addition to his charakter. And it really fits. August 22, 2020 at 11:57PM

I have no idea where tf you got “rape victims really enjoy it” out of anything i said. It literally says in the wiki on this very subreddit that someone can enjoy sex and still be ace. And I also don’t want to ever have sex again or at least it wouldn’t be a huge loss for me. So I don’t get why you’re being so hardline about me identifying with ace adjacent labels August 22, 2020 at 11:57PM

Yeah, I heard about her on this sub! I follow her on Instagram! ♡♡ August 22, 2020 at 11:56PM

Glad to see more of us in the comments here. So many aces seem reluctant to dress up because of the attention they get ♡♡ August 22, 2020 at 11:55PM

Yeah, ive got that curvy figure, too. That attracts a lot of attention. But im glad to hear your dressing how you want! ♡♡ Ive seen a lot of responses on this thread from aces who are too scared to dress up because of the attention they get. August 22, 2020 at 11:55PM

If I‘m thinking about the correct one, it‘s full of exclusionist gatekeeper scum August 22, 2020 at 11:54PM

They call themselves involuntary celibates, shortened to incels. They believe in some fucked up stuff about women, how we are only interested in "alpha male" types, and that women chose all of their partners based on how attractive they are, or, if the guy is unattractive but dating a "hot" girl, then he must be rich and shes there for his money. They have a whole comllicatex belief about what traits make someone attractive and they're not it, so therefore they can't get laid. They're like Nice Guys™ taken to an extreme. A lot of them also think they're entitled to like, government issued wives and/or prostitutes. Basically, theyre jackasses who cannot comprehend that their shitty, misogynistic personalities and their typically absolute shit personal hygene are at fault for their problems, not women August 22, 2020 at 11:52PM

Your example is not an honest translation of what I’m suggesting. It would be more like someone who is willing to engage in a homosexual/romantic relationship, perhaps for the rest of their lives, even though they are not homosexual because of some perceived benefit of homosexual relationships. I feel like people in this thread have really rigid views on sexuality. Megan fox was in a long term relationship with a woman at one point, but she considers herself straight and hasn’t dated another woman before or since. Sexuality/gender/etc are a lot more fluid than crude simplistic labels like gay or straight would suggest August 22, 2020 at 11:51PM

Well you can explain to the people who aren't looking for hookups the situation. You just said you were going to explain it by the first date anyways. I don't really care if you call yourself ace or not I just think you should try honesty first. I would rather you didn't hide behind our community if you're not though. Check out this subreddit's FAQ and/or research the different sexualities associated with asexuality because it sounds like you could possibly identify with one of them. Maybe. If you find one that you can identify with then you don't have to lie. August 22, 2020 at 11:51PM

10 including free, all of which said by my mother (she’s not actively against it or anything but she definitely doesn’t understand it and thinks I’m a bit weird). August 22, 2020 at 11:49PM

I'm totally wierd when someone says something about a character of the shadowhunter series, because I read the book, but haven't seen the series. So in this case I was like "Raphael is an ace? When is that said?", but then I realise, that, from what I heard, the series is completely different from the books. (It's not like book Raphael is definitely not Ace, but there was no indication to his sexuallity, at least none that I remember) August 22, 2020 at 11:48PM

I avoided dating all throughout high school because I was so scared I'd start to really care for someone, only to get pressured into sex. In my one relationship, I was up front about everything and yet it ended up exactly like that. We dated for almost 6 months, actually. I think from now on im only dating other aces. August 22, 2020 at 11:46PM

I'm fine with being our own group. The only thing we have in common with them is that we are not "standard" and can potentially see discrimination because of that. But you could pick almost any other group of people that face discrimination for not being "standard" and we have pretty much the same amount in common with them as we do with lgbt. Also I genuinely think you should call them gay-keepers instead of gate-keepers. It's catchier. August 22, 2020 at 11:46PM

I just can’t deny that there are definitely times when i see a really hot stranger and all the ways I would fuck them briefly involuntarily flashes through my head. August 22, 2020 at 11:45PM

No, but a lot of us do not want to ever have sex. And those of us who do rarely do it for our selves, but for our partners. To me that sounds a lot like not wanting to have sex has nothing to do with enjoying it... so rape victims really enjoy it. And that I sincerely hope sounds outrageous to you. August 22, 2020 at 11:44PM

Cherishing is a habit of mind in which, when you are separated during the course of the day, you maximize thoughts of your partner’s positive qualities and minimize thoughts of negative ones. This active focusing on your partner’s merits allows you to nurture gratefulness for what you have instead of resenting what is missing. Many couples do not realize they are neglecting to cherish each other. Gottman - https://www.amazon.com/Seven-Principles-Making-Marriage-Work/dp/0553447718/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=7+pillars+marriage+Gottman&qid=1598138673&s=instant-video&sr=1-1 I love this, I didn’t know I should do this, I just did it instinctively, it seemed like the right way to be married to someone. Why marry someone where this doesn’t feel automatic? Marriages take big challenges and all of us will sometimes forget to invest in our marriages. This sort of unforced error is usually caused by other stressors, children, illness, financial, whatever. If you both invested...

So he lives down the street, and he’s 15 years older and has kids (divorced). We’ve never met, and his ex-wife lives a couple houses down. I’ve met her—she has always seemed nice. I want to meet him but don’t know how. I pass his house everyday but barely ever even drive past him (we must have different hours). He’s definitely not in a relationship or seeing anyone. I am not even sure if we’re compatible but he comes across as a really nice, smart, down to earth guy and last guy I dated was a complete narcissist. Any thoughts? Also is there any way he might be completely turned off by the fact that I’m 39 and he’s 56 or 57? Submitted August 22, 2020 at 11:11PM So he lives down the street, and he’s 15 years older and has kids (divorced). We’ve never met, and his ex-wife lives a couple houses down. I’ve met her—she has always seemed nice. I want to meet him but don’t know how. I pass his house everyday but barely ever even drive past him (we must have different hours). He’s defini...

I met a guy back in April. We're both from different states. We began talking every single night on the phone for 4 months. We've video chatted as well. I asked him what's the deal with us after a month. He told me that he's not invested in any other woman. He isn't on any of his dating apps anymore and can't focus on any other woman when he's really into me Anyway months passed. We're still talking every night for hours. I won't lie there were some things I wasn't ok with. I won't go into detail of allll the other things here as I don't want to make this too long, but happy to elaborate in comments We made plans to see each other in October Fast forward to 2 weeks ago. I asked for clarity on us again. He started dating and has been going out on dates the last month. I was very upset by this, because an update was never given. The trust was shot as I discovered a couple of events he went to and would tell me he was out late with famil...

I’m hoping you can all help me with some advice – throw away for obvious reasons I’ve recently started seeing a woman whom I knew back in uni. Always had a crush on her, but I was with someone, then she was with someone and so nothing happened. Fast forward 15 years she getting a divorce from the guy who physically and mentally abused her and her 2 kids. Things between us are really good, proceeding slowing with lots of reassurance but they are good. She's intelligent, funny and I remember why I had such a crush on her. The issue we are worried about is how to break to the kids. She has 2 children a boy who is 8 and a girl who is 5. I’ve met the kids often, I like them a lot and it seems to be mutual. Her son has his own emotional scars from his father and can be really difficult, but now that the father isn’t around he’s loads better but still has his scars. We are keeping the relationship between us a secret and showing the kids nothing but being a friend, but I doubt this...

Original Thread: https://www.reddit.com/r/datingoverthirty/comments/icudw1/new_to_healthy_dating_anxious_attachment_style/ So I ended up texting him again on Wednesday (short, "How is your week going?" and Friday "Is everything okay - hope the job is okay!" No response to either. Okay, job is bad. He's busy. Phone broken - trying to give him the benefit of the doubt in my head. So I called him today, Saturday. Surprisingly it rang through 5x to VM - I thought I might have been blocked. So I left one just saying I was getting worried, hoped everything was going okay, and to please just call or text me to let me know everything was okay. He called back a couple of minutes later but hung up right away - clearly he didn't mean to call but had seen my call/vm. So I gave him about 20 minutes to see if he was going to text and no, so I called back (since I did have a missed call from him. And it rang once and then VM. So he blocked me. Literally ghosted me a...

Meaning long text messages with several paragraphs where you'll have to scroll to read all of it. Do you like more information rather than less? Or do you think it's coming on too strong from someone you're only casually/in the initial throes of dating (even if you've already slept with them), or think oh man, do they expect me to respond to all this. This is from someone you're not overly chatty or texting every day or having phone calls with yet, but know them enough/you've already slept together where you'll want to hear from them to get an update every few days before you schedule your next meeting, but I'm wondering if a "wall" is too much. I'll sometimes try to just text newer partners at the same rate they text me, but if we're not talking every day, sometimes I just have more to say. Submitted August 22, 2020 at 06:33PM Meaning long text messages with several paragraphs where you'll have to scroll to read all of it. ...

If I could find out what I’m doing wrong or rather where I can make small changes to improve, I’d want to know. Apparently, asking on a first date someone’s timeline for having kids doesn’t lend well for a second date 😂😬. Would you want to know from actual dates why there wasn’t another date? Especially if it’s something small and the behavior can be easily modified? I’m gonna hold off on asking about timeline for having kids going forward. Submitted August 22, 2020 at 02:27PM If I could find out what I’m doing wrong or rather where I can make small changes to improve, I’d want to know. Apparently, asking on a first date someone’s timeline for having kids doesn’t lend well for a second date 😂😬. Would you want to know from actual dates why there wasn’t another date? Especially if it’s something small and the behavior can be easily modified? I’m gonna hold off on asking about timeline for having kids going forward.