I am mid-twenties. I am popular enough. Charismatic enough. Social enough. But this all flies out the window with women my own age. I can talk to younger women. And older women. Hell, some of my best friends are older women. But otherwise I cannot talk to women my own age. Like they will talk to me and I just can't think. I am perfectly social enough. 27.Years of practice. Always talking to women my own age. And always embarrassing myself. It will never change. How do I change. Submitted December 12, 2020 at 12:12AM I am mid-twenties.I am popular enough. Charismatic enough. Social enough.But this all flies out the window with women my own age. I can talk to younger women. And older women. Hell, some of my best friends are older women.But otherwise I cannot talk to women my own age. Like they will talk to me and I just can't think.I am perfectly social enough. 27.Years of practice. Always talking to women my own age. And always embarrassing myself.It will never chang...

Ive (23) been talking with this girl (25) ive matched with for a couple of days and have had really good conversation with her. I dont want to keep texting and possibly have either side lose interest because we havent met in person. Are there any in-person date idea recommendations you could give me while obviously being mindful of everything going on in the world? Thank you so much! Submitted December 12, 2020 at 12:14AM Ive (23) been talking with this girl (25) ive matched with for a couple of days and have had really good conversation with her. I dont want to keep texting and possibly have either side lose interest because we havent met in person. Are there any in-person date idea recommendations you could give me while obviously being mindful of everything going on in the world? Thank you so much!

I never know what normal behaviour is when dating and what is considered a red flag. This is due to severe childhood abuse. As a result I've been in abusive relationships and sometimes dated wrong guys. Once I was out of the situation, it was clear how wrong it all was but when it's happening I can't see it. I'm paranoid now and consider everything a red flag. I'm in therapy to process the abuse but it's not a problem you can solve easily. What are (subtle) red flags in the dating phase? Submitted December 12, 2020 at 12:16AM I never know what normal behaviour is when dating and what is considered a red flag. This is due to severe childhood abuse. As a result I've been in abusive relationships and sometimes dated wrong guys. Once I was out of the situation, it was clear how wrong it all was but when it's happening I can't see it. I'm paranoid now and consider everything a red flag. I'm in therapy to process the abuse but it's not a...

I would like to propose “It’s only sex” by car seat headrest Haven’t seen many ace people talking about the song but for me it has been an ace anthem all along and sort of helped me with first referring to myself as ace. Don’t know if it’s actually about asexuality but for me it definitely is. December 12, 2020 at 12:06AM

You could just be feeling a bit hormonal? Hormones rise sometimes so maybe that's what you're experiencing. December 12, 2020 at 12:05AM

Haha same, raised in Catholic school until 7th grade! Also never understood and was pretty much creeped out when people made these types of sexual comments and thought it was a big joke as well 🤣 December 12, 2020 at 12:00AM

I am sorry, I hope that you start to feel better soon December 11, 2020 at 11:56PM

This is coming from a person (17M) that has sexual urges: Do you think that you (all asexuals) are able to focus on what you think is important in life? Albeit your career/hobbies or your partner that you are romantically interested in. I sometimes even feel bad that I sexualize people I don't even know that well. My imagination can go wild sometimes... (nothing degrading ofc) Even though I feel it both, I value romantic sexuality way above physical sexuality, and it is bugging me that I sometimes masturbate to fantasies not involving romance. I am a hopeless romantic in my heart and feel like this whole sex business is getting in the way... December 11, 2020 at 11:54PM

Uhhhh your coworkers are creeps. Good luck dealing with them. December 11, 2020 at 11:53PM

I remember reading book reviews for the hunger games that were like “there is no sex. Why is katniss such a prude.” But I never noticed the lack of it and I felt like the lack of it added to the story and made sense with her background? Very annoying how sex is just shoehorned everywhere December 11, 2020 at 11:44PM

Not good pizza takeaway in the UK unless you’re a student eating alone. December 11, 2020 at 11:44PM

I too was baffled by how weak people were when it came to their sexual urges since I could fend them off with amazing ease and I wasn’t raised catholic at all. I understood vows of chastity and just watched in awe the inner fight they were having with themselves that could be equal to a physical fight with a bear like, just don’t have sex...it’s not hard but then my starving need to be joined at the pelvic area was never screaming. 99% of the time it was silent and the 1% when it wasn’t, I could easy ignore and control so yeah didn’t dawn on me that it wasn’t in fact my superhuman resolve that was keeping my sexual hunger at bay but the fact I was ace...no sexual attraction at all and I looked at a lot of different people and yeah nothing. I often wonder what it would be like to be slave to your urges especially your sexual ones and stand rather annoyed at how far behind society is when it comes to science and medicine simply because people can’t get back to work expanding on what co...

I actually believe this. I always wonder even in relationships where the asexual has sex, is it ever enough? December 11, 2020 at 11:33PM

Most of them are half dead terms only used in formal essays December 11, 2020 at 11:31PM

That is true, I guess with the way so much is fixated on sex it can sometimes be hard to remember December 11, 2020 at 11:25PM

Wait, what? I thought people only unironically want to have sex with their significant other, someone who they love and trust completely... December 11, 2020 at 11:24PM

This is incredible! December 11, 2020 at 11:24PM

I (kinda) thought it was a joke too. Like I can understand when/if people are attractive, but I don't want to screw them at first sight... because what if they're awful people or something? What if we have nothing in common? (To be fair, the majority of people on my mother's side of the family are grey-aces too, and my father's side is very religious and on the spectrum.) December 11, 2020 at 11:21PM

I always though people were joking too! I was sitting there, listening to people saying it all the time, and I was so confused. Even now that I fully know I'm ace I'm just... do you really think that? Is it so normal for non-ace people to want sex so bad? What's the deal here?!? Legit thought it's just a big, collective joke. December 11, 2020 at 11:15PM

Thanks for doing this! December 11, 2020 at 11:09PM

I'm not attracted to ANYONE, women & men I just do not feel anything towards anyone. That sounds fairly asexual to me! Ultimately, only you can define what you are, of course. But asexuality really just means this lack of sexual attraction. The other things are strong indicators that support your asexuality, but this one is really the gist of it. December 11, 2020 at 11:08PM

can i upvote more than once December 11, 2020 at 11:08PM

"no no square" sent me 🤣 December 11, 2020 at 11:07PM