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Showing posts from July, 2022

/u/onlyalittleillegal on What would you choose in bed?

I can't have cake. Too sweet. Texturally displeasing. Yuck. August 01, 2022 at 01:33AM

/u/zoologygirl16 on am i mistaken with the definition? kinda confused now

This is...wrong. Ace people have nerve endings in their privates. They can experience pleasure as much as anyone else and get seratonine and dopamine from it. We can desire that experience. It does not mean we experience sexual attraction tho August 01, 2022 at 01:26AM

Unlucky in dates

Hi all. I'm 33 male living in UK. Originally not from this country. Moved together with my now ex. Broke up after 2 years, initiative was hers. Have been trying to get a date for 3 years with no luck. From time to time I give up then start over. I want to find a girl to have a family with. Pof, Tinder and literally tryed all other apps. No luck, not even a single proper conv. No dates as well. Thinking about giving up for good. Feels super depressing. P.S. I have and always had a job, don't smoke at all, almost don't drink alcohol. Submitted August 01, 2022 at 01:11AM Hi all. I'm 33 male living in UK. Originally not from this country. Moved together with my now ex. Broke up after 2 years, initiative was hers. Have been trying to get a date for 3 years with no luck. From time to time I give up then start over. I want to find a girl to have a family with. Pof, Tinder and literally tryed all other apps. No luck, not even a single proper conv. No dates as well.Thin

/u/gatemansgc on The amount of straight-up aphobia and misunderstandings about asexuality in the comments is just really disheartening

Yeah what a roller-coaster August 01, 2022 at 12:32AM

Strange date experience the other night, would be interested in hearing other perspectives

Sorry this is long Went on a first date Thursday evening, we met up at a small art gallery then went out to dinner. At the restaurant, we happened to run into a couple of her friends. We ended up sitting and eating together and then went to a hookah lounge together (something I should point out: it was my date's idea to hang out with her friends for the rest of the evening) One of her friends was very into me, and this friend was charming and cuter than my date, but I didn't want to be "that guy" and didn't pay her any special attention. She did talk to me a lot and ask me questions (and offered to buy me a drink, though I didn't take her up on it), and I made pleasant conversation with her, but again, I didn't go out of my way to give her extra attention. This friend also invited me to an event happening the next night with all three of them (my date and the two friends). My date had already invited me to the event and I'd already thought about goi

Is it recoverable?

I (M21) told (F21) how I felt to early and spooked her. For background we only been talking for about 2 weeks and we are polar opposites. I’m more extroverted and wears my heart on my sleeves while she’s more introverted and closed off. I take things at a fast pace while she takes things at a slower pace. I told her yesterday that I like her and wanted to move faster and this scared her. She wanted to talk for six months before dating and she’s not used to such a fast pace and the pace we already been going is to fast for her. She never had a Boyfriend or even kissed a guy. We went on a “date” but she didn’t want to count it as date and more of a hangout. But we were doing date things like hugging on each other and holding hands. She said she felt like the pace that she wants doesn’t line up with what I want or need. I’m down to slow down because I really like her.(I get attached fast) I had a girlfriends in the past my longest being two years. I came up with a deal where basicall

/u/Eithang16 on Same honestly

Nah Fr same July 30, 2022 at 11:21PM

/u/fizziesrevenge on I just figured out that I am a triple A battery (aromantic,asexual and agender)

I didn’t come up with it. It’s been a thing for a bit. July 30, 2022 at 11:19PM

/u/Soft_Hunter1033 on HSP anyone?

Setting aside the debate on terminology for a minute I’ll try to answer the question you asked by sharing my personal experience. I don’t know how to label it so I’ll speak specifically to practical experience and say that I tend to be prone to sensory overload under certain circumstances and be particularly affected by certain stimuli. As I’ve gotten older and more self aware, I’ve learned to manage it by avoiding those situations that are likely to affect me negatively. But I don’t think that has anything to do with my being asexual. I don’t think I’d experience sexual attraction regardless. But I do wonder whether it influences my tendency to be sex averse. There are certain aspects of sexual activity I know I wouldn’t react well to from a purely sensory perspective. Of course that’s all anecdotal and individual personal experience so take from it what you will. July 30, 2022 at 11:18PM

/u/Soft_Hunter1033 on HSP anyone?

Setting aside the debate on terminology for a minute I’ll try to answer the question you asked by sharing my personal experience. I don’t know how to label it so I’ll speak specifically to practical experience and say that I tend to be prone to sensory overload under certain circumstances and be particularly affected by certain stimuli. As I’ve gotten older and more self aware, I’ve learned to manage it by avoiding those situations that are likely to affect me negatively. But I don’t think that has anything to do with my being asexual. I don’t think I’d experience sexual attraction regardless. But I do wonder whether it influences my tendency to be sex averse. There are certain aspects of sexual activity I know I wouldn’t react well to from a purely sensory perspective. Of course that’s all anecdotal and individual personal experience so take from it what you will. July 30, 2022 at 11:18PM

/u/Botella-1 on what was your 'oh' moment with asexuality?

Jaiden Animations July 30, 2022 at 11:13PM

/u/Ya-boi-Joey-T on I’m not asexual, but my girlfriend is a flavor of ace, I have ace friends, etc. And this person is INFURIATING.

Me and my asexualism July 30, 2022 at 11:10PM

/u/missemilyowen15 on Saw this major ace vibes

Me: grabs controller July 30, 2022 at 11:03PM

/u/miss-laea on Anyone else notice what PostSecret shared on FB today?

Why do you think bi ppl can’t be monogamous, sounds pretty biphobic to me July 30, 2022 at 01:29AM

did I fuck up now

I meet a girl for like half a year now. We most of the time meet with the 2 of us doing hikes, bike trips, yoga etc. together. I thought we d be friends cause she dated someone else when we got to know us but we never clarified this and I wasnt sure about it anymore soon as she flirted a lot with me. On the other hand there were a lot of times she seemed to ignore me, or her telling me how she had sex with another guy. The day before I left for a half year lf exchange in which wed probably wouldnt see each other we went party with some friend. After we drove home together and she came to my house. She hugged me for a minute and I was pretty sure she Wanted to kiss me Now but I was tired and didnt want to take her in and didnt do it. Im afraid now that she thinks im not interested and wouldnt try if with me again. What do you think, should I write her about it and tell her I liked the Hugor or would that be cringe and sounding insecure or should I just wait till she visits me (before t

/u/CougarRunFast on where do yall fall?

Ok It’s not that I don’t like women. I have some female friends but I feel more comfortable and open when talking to men. I would date a woman if her personality is what I like. I just get along better with men. July 29, 2022 at 11:37PM

advice needed

Hey guys, back after a year. Been a while Lol. Anyways. I last visited this subreddit when I had broken the news to my then girlfriend who broke up with me shortly after. We didn't last a week. It took four days total. The story she made was that her parents looked through her phone and saw us. At that time I believed her and supported her regardless as it wasn't in her control. Sooner than later she slipped up big time and accidentally revealed that it was all just a lie. She did it for the fun of it basically. Friends have been saying I could exact revenge in some shape or form or I could do what I currently do which is just ignore her and move on regardless of my mental state. What do you guys think is the best course of action? Submitted July 30, 2022 at 12:14AM Hey guys, back after a year. Been a while Lol. Anyways. I last visited this subreddit when I had broken the news to my then girlfriend who broke up with me shortly after. We didn't last a week. It took fo

/u/supernova888 on This was annoying

UK, must have been about 2011ish maybe a year off. The activity I guess was to make people loosen up? I didn't really get why we did it at the time honestly. It was a whole day of different sex related talks. We got to watch them put a condom on a banana and stuff like that. July 29, 2022 at 11:35PM

Hasn’t asked me out on 4th date yet

Hi there Just wanted some advice on this situation. I (F26) dating a guy (M24). We started talking on a dating app and hit it off. I hinted we should go for coffee and we did. We connected really well, he texted smth along the lines let me know if you want to do this again. And we did ! Then I suggested a third date. All three dates were fabulous. But I felt like I might have been the one suggesting and planning the dates. So I was hoping he’d ask me out on a 4th date without me initiating it. We text daily at least once. So I don’t understand why he wouldn’t. I indirectly asked him about his weekend plans and he just gave me a regular answer without suggesting we should meet up. I don’t want to be the only one putting the effort in this and if he likes me wouldn’t he want to meet up with me ? Ugh idk I’m confused. Submitted July 29, 2022 at 12:14AM Hi there Just wanted some advice on this situation. I (F26) dating a guy (M24). We started talking on a dating app and hit it off.

/u/binadanae on I can’t tell if i’m asexual, or somewhere else on the spectrum!

Sexual disgust is a very common response, and it seems especially high in women. Disgust is a natural feeling that has evolved to prevent us from things like illness and contamination. Saliva and sweat are two of the more gross aspects of sex. Those things are gross even without the sexual context. It could be that you’re quicker to disgust and even within the context of sex, it’s hard for you to shake. Most people feel disgust about bodies and it’s the context of sex and our desire for it and us getting turned on that usually overpowers the disgust at least while we’re doing it. Disgust isn’t always about physical things, we can have psychological disgust when we think about things that are traditionally seen as immoral, such as having sex. I think you really need to think about why you are disgusted by certain things. I’m not sure what you meant about experimenting, and it could just be the newness of it and the fact that you were turned on that helped mitigate the disgust, but it

/u/wanderingzigzag on Who’s your asexual exception?

Australia :) Could get an old cheap house for that out of the city, or maybe a crappy unit in the outer suburbs lol, we’re just talking absolute minimums here, $500k would obviously be better July 28, 2022 at 11:43PM

/u/DustErrant on i hate seeing things like this, we're not emotionless, we can still desire closeness with another person, im not any less lonely being asexual

Grass is always greener on the other side. People are generally bad at empathy, they can generally only see their own suffering and are very bad at understanding why those who are different may also be suffering for reasons they haven't bothered to try to comprehend. July 28, 2022 at 11:43PM

/u/DustErrant on Just discovered my asexuality had a medical cause. Feeling a bit lost right now.

While I think a lot of the community here is tired of people claiming they most have a hormone imbalance or something medically wrong with them, the truth of the matter is, there ARE people with medical conditions that affects how they view sexual attraction and libido. You're just as much a fraud as someone who realized they were gay after having been in multiple straight relationships...that is to say, you're not a fraud at all. Things happen, things change. For it to be fraud, it would have be knowingly done and malicious in nature, and I'm pretty sure it was neither. July 28, 2022 at 11:40PM

/u/free_bird_eren on I love it when reddit shows me aphobic shit then when it try to educate people, get down voted. Don't you just love being rejected by both sides?

LGBT even excluded bi and tans people ???? then are only gay people LGBT???? July 28, 2022 at 11:40PM

/u/Angelcakes101 on Who’s your asexual exception?

Chiaki is so cool July 28, 2022 at 11:39PM

/u/ennyxy on Dyed my hair purple! Do I look ace yet? :D Seriously tho, got tired of natural colors. I'll be honest the bg is edited,but cuz the doorway caught in the frame and it bothered me. The second pic is the original. No face cuz I don't always feel like showing myself)

Oooh bet that was quite a look too :0 And thank you 💜 July 28, 2022 at 01:41AM

/u/-chychy- on Dyed my hair purple! Do I look ace yet? :D Seriously tho, got tired of natural colors. I'll be honest the bg is edited,but cuz the doorway caught in the frame and it bothered me. The second pic is the original. No face cuz I don't always feel like showing myself)

i just realized that after i read it again. sorry😭❤️ it looks amazing though July 28, 2022 at 01:41AM

He hasn't replied to my message but has been online...

So I met this really cute guy through my friend and I thought things were going well? We'd talk whenever we met (bbq, dim sum) and had good conversation, laughing a good amount too. I hit him up after dim sum and he'd taken a while to respond each time though it went on from Sunday to Tuesday... in my head I'm like if you're taking hours to reply each time why are you even bothering to keep on the convo by asking more questions? I was joking about how he should teach us to make dumplings! and he said he'd coordinate it and I didn't take it seriously until he planned a couple of us to cook lunch together. I was surprised because we all know he doesn't like initiating and making plans We cooked lunch with our one friend and the conversation was going well, lots of questions were directed at me trying to get to know me ("what do you notice in a person when you first meet them?" and inquiring about my life) and I'd return the question. We laughed

How do I fix this?

I (34m) am coming out of yet another failed "relationship" at 3 months. This seems to happen regularly, I get to the 3 month point, basically at the honeymoon phase, and can't get beyond that. This girl was absolutely perfect for me. She says I'm just missing some "quality" which she can't describe. I know the quality. I've known I'm lacking it for a while, but I don't know where to get it. I'm no alpha male, and I don't want to be, but I'm not even a beta. I'm so far down the list that there's not even a name for it. I'm not confident, I'm extremely self depricating which is obviously a turn off. In my last relationship, she was contacted by her ex. She told me about it, and obviously wanted me to do something, but I just didn't. I sat there and tried to be the "better man" and ultimately she went back to him. I wouldn't say I'm ugly, I have a decent funny personality, I own my own home, g

/u/KillME778 on am i allowed to call myself asexual if ive only ever been sexually attracted to legolas from lord of the rings?

His face is just making me laugh 😆 July 28, 2022 at 12:39AM

Help asking this girl out

I met her at a party. We had a brief chat and she gave me her number. I texted her the next day and she replied back initially but stopped responding to the conversation. Should I double text and properly ask her out? Or should I take the not interested hint? Or should I text just to hang out with friends? Submitted July 28, 2022 at 12:07AM I met her at a party. We had a brief chat and she gave me her number. I texted her the next day and she replied back initially but stopped responding to the conversation.Should I double text and properly ask her out? Or should I take the not interested hint? Or should I text just to hang out with friends?

/u/CoeusTheCanny on Chell is the most ace videogame character, all she wants is cake

Yeah, but it is still canon. July 27, 2022 at 12:05AM

/u/hpfan1516 on hmm...?

Well yes but actually no? Or... Well no but actually yes...? July 27, 2022 at 12:05AM

/u/mechemin on I've been asked out on a date for the first time and need advice

I think that talking about what each party expects of the relationship and making clear about what boundaries you have is important. I think it's unfair for the other party if you start the relationship without making your sexuality clear. The other party may expect some intimacy and that's a normal thing to expect in a romantic relationship, be clear if you don't want it and explain why. The other person has every right to decide if those boundaries are something they're willing to accept or not. July 27, 2022 at 12:03AM

/u/Behold_Me on I had sex for the first time after knowing I was asexual

Yeah, I'm more relief to know that too, that was a question I had months ago July 27, 2022 at 12:01AM

/u/Antiherowriting on Just realized I am apothisexual 🥳

r/apothisexual come join us!! July 27, 2022 at 12:01AM

I keep on going back and forth into hookup culture help!!!

So I was absitent for 7 months than somehow I always end up convincing myself hookup culture is okay and that I can have a sneaky link or friends with bens. That in my head I can say we're together even if we're actually not cause we're messing with each other and that it could last years and it will be like I'm in a relationship or well it could lead to something serious. So I had sex again for the first time and it's been hard on me more emotions this time and knowing I'm gonna get feelings very badly I always end up getting hurt. Before this I was in hookup culture for about 6/2 years I wanted out than just like I want out now but my brain always convinces me I can just do it one last time I'm not happy when I'm in it but sex makes me feel loved and I get validated in big ways. How can I stop for good I can't feel real emotions now and sleeping with someone first night ever meeting them is no big deal to me now. When it really should be and like

/u/HatlyHats on Yesterday, we broke up because of my asexuality.

I was realizing I was ace while my ex-boyfriend transitioned. Other things broke us up, but that would have too eventually, because it was very important to him to be sexually desirable to his partner as a man, when it had never been important to him to be sexually desirable before. There was no anger or blame, we were just wrong together. July 26, 2022 at 11:28PM

How can 2 people with limited relationship experience ensure it's success?

He is 26, I'm 25, and I met him on Hinge last month and June 10th, to be exact; we messaged each other every day for eight days until he suggested we go out for dinner on June 18th, 2022. We went out for dinner and drinks, and at first, he was very talkative in person. Still, he seemed super nervous, but we managed to have a good conversation flow. Ever since, he has texted me about twice every week, Monday and & Thursday or, at times, Wednesday and Friday, and often asks me to go on a date with him on Saturdays. When he texts me, he asks me about my day and how my week is going, shares pictures of his home decor, and texts me during the holiday weekend when he is at his family's cabin to check in on my day. I also initiate some check-ins, but he has taken the initiative regarding texting twice a week. That said, in his text, he calls me beautiful, he is flirty, and so forth; now, in person, I'm meeting a very awkward guy that seems a bit nervous and tends to forget

/u/wizard1234591d on I am desperately searching for a cause for my asexuality

Were you like traumatized or something when you were exposed to porn or did you just find it uninteresting? July 26, 2022 at 12:46AM

He is sick! should i ignore him moving forward?

Few days back i (32 year old black female) wrote i think 3 posts here on reddit which i later deleted coz i stumbled on new info. Anyway these posts were about this hot erratic man (30 year old white male) who i met a few months back and who was constantly disappearing on me and flat out told me that i am not his type only for him to re-surface and flirt with me (even show signs of jealousy when i went on a date with a different guy. A 35 year old white male) It was hard for me to understand him or what he wanted especially because i had expressed my interest and at some point i even felt that maybe he could just be some racist asshole or maybe he has a wife or something. Something felt wrong! We stuck to just having fun (NO SEX!) Just weed and drinking. Going out dancing, eating etc. (Which were all my treats coz he has no money) But there was always this distance he kept and my gut always picked a weird vibe from him. Anyway long story short: 1.Clothed him at some point 2.Offered

He wants me to cook him a homemade meal but won’t go out to dinner with me?

I recently met this guy and we talked on the phone and FaceTimed a couple times in like a week. He just moved to my neighborhood and keeps asking me to hang out. He suggested a walk or just grab a coffee. Today I ask him if he wants to get together and he said yes. He said “pasta night?” Since I talked about how I love to cook and eat pasta. I said sure and asked where we were going. He said he wanted me to make the pasta homemade since I talked about it. I asked if we could go out since I worked and didn’t get groceries. He said no, he wasn’t ready to take me out to dinner like that but would gladly come over and eat my food. Wtf? I said no I wouldn’t invite a man I’ve never hung out with over to my place and cook for him and he said that was rude and we haven’t spoke. Is this the 1950s? Am I crazy for telling him no? I thought go out casually, hit a fancy dinner date. He took it the wrong way but wants me to make home a homemade meal on my dime? How am I in the wrong in his eyes??

Should I send her an apology text?

Long story short, I was seeing a girl for a while. We hooked up for about a month and I was the first person she was seeing in some time. We both rushed into sharing our past relationship issues/trauma and got pretty attached.. then back to back Saturday’s I got emotional when opening up about our parents/past partners infidelity. Got a little jealous the next weekend but apologized immediately. There were no fights/arguments, just me being insecure. I thought everything was fine, she was texting me to see me and come to my area (I live 30 minutes away). I was unavailable and then things ended two days later. I was overly stoic and kind of was just like “okay, sounds good bye 👋” when she said she’d love to stay friends b/c timing might be right later on. I just assumed she was letting me down easy but her friend confirmed that was not the case. I was thinking about reaching out for the first time in two months: “I did want to stay friends and I’m sorry if it came off like I didn’t

/u/AnimChurro on The comments on the post also made me question now lol

She has the look of stabbing me through the screen July 25, 2022 at 11:22PM

/u/Hewned on I'm 19 year old male from Poland, living with aphobic father, ask me anything

1 no problem 2 are you out to him as ace? July 25, 2022 at 01:04AM

don't know how to meet people (24m)

I'm a 24 year old male and I have been single since the middle of high school. I had a 4 month relationship with a girl in high school which I ended after seeing we just weren't compatible with each other. I didn't attend college instead going straight to work and I've worked in male-dominated fields where there aren't many, if any women to interact with. I had one female former coworker who I went on a date with but it was never going to work and so we ended it very quickly. Bars are not and never were my kind of place. My hobbies are cars, football, and hockey, and I do go to car shows, football games and hockey games but I don't feel like it would be appropriate to try and solicit a date from someone at one of these events. I want very much to meet a girl and have a serious relationship. I've tried dating apps but they all seem geared towards hookups and attention seekers. I'm just not sure where and how to find someone. Submitted July 25, 2022

/u/Flamehammer04 on What are your favorite canonically a-spec human characters or heavily a-spec-coded human characters or human characters who are often hinted that they do not experience or lack S/R attraction in media? Here are mine :D

Parvati from The Outerworlds as well as Cipher and Solo Wing Pixy from AC0 July 25, 2022 at 12:31AM

a psychic reading completely ruined my hopes for a person i've been talking to

unsure of where else to post this, feel free to delete/move. when i was really anxious and depressed a few years ago i picked up a bad habit of speaking to an "intuitive consultant". I've since found an amazing therapist so i'm not nearly as addicted as i was but i decided to reach out to her. i mainly wanted to ask about career but since i matched with a cute guy on sunday and things were looking good (we texted everyday, he formally asked me on a date, sends gm texts etc.) i decided to stupidly ask her for confirmation of what would happen. right away she said he was just looking for sex. i told her his profile explicitly says twice that he's looking for a relationship and "not here for hookups". she said that he's just saying that to trick women into sleeping with him, and that if i go out with him he would cheat on me. she also said he was talking to five other girls to sleep with. i just got over a bad situationship and was so excited to sp

/u/Not_sure_lmao on What are your favorite canonically a-spec human characters or heavily a-spec-coded human characters or human characters who are often hinted that they do not experience or lack S/R attraction in media? Here are mine :D

Which ones that again? I can’t remember her July 24, 2022 at 11:30PM

27F; Feeling bad about finances while dating a 36M

I'm (27f) dating someone a little older than me (36M), and he's in a very different place in life. He's much more financially secure with a job that let's him work months and then take months off and just travel. He's very flexible because of his income. I'm the opposite, I'm not paid as well, and am trying to save up money to get a graduate degree. I'm working full time, but most of it goes to savings and bills. I get to splurge once in a while, but it's not on big things. It's hard because I feel guilty that I can't treat him like he treats me sometimes and I don't know how to talk to him about it. Like he'll invite me to dinner but make reservations at a really expensive restaurant. Or he'll invite me to come traveling with him but I have to turn that down because of time off work and the cost. I don't know if he always thinks about how I can't drop money like he does. It feels nice that he wants to include me but it

Long term single + Moving to a new town

Maybe not the best title & definitely a bit of a ramble, but… For context: I moved to university 5 years ago. During that time I had one relationship with a person who was a good friend of mine before the relationship. At the start of our relationship, we never dated, we kinda just fell into it. She broke it off at the end of my second year and to be honest, it properly screwed me up, fully broke my heart. But it is what it is, we move on. By the time I was ready to start seeing other people, covid hit and I ended up moving back home. I continued living at home, before then moving for a 1 year long internship. I returned to university last year, for my final year and joined tinder, hinge and bumble. Since then I’ve been on one date with one person and drunkenly kissed another. I recently graduated and I start my grad job next month, it’s my dream job. Only problem being, it’s in small town, roughly and hour from the nearest big city. I’m quite happy on my own, but I would a

/u/CaughttheDarkness on Most trustworthy Redditor

I for one vote against brigading. July 24, 2022 at 12:14AM

I’m off on my first date and need help

I’m 17m and my date is 18f we’ve been on a few coffee dates previously and she asked me out on a dinner date at a nice restaurant, and since this is my first big date I’ve been stressing out on this pretty bad. I don’t know how to act or dress or think right now and just want some advice. Submitted July 23, 2022 at 11:49PM I’m 17m and my date is 18f we’ve been on a few coffee dates previously and she asked me out on a dinner date at a nice restaurant, and since this is my first big date I’ve been stressing out on this pretty bad. I don’t know how to act or dress or think right now and just want some advice.

What do you talk about on dates?

I was on a first date last night and I was the most socially awkward human ever. For some reason I was just blank on all conversation topics. What do you all talk about on first or second dates? Submitted July 24, 2022 at 12:14AM I was on a first date last night and I was the most socially awkward human ever. For some reason I was just blank on all conversation topics. What do you all talk about on first or second dates?

/u/ofMindandHeart on do asexuals experience sexual pleasure ?

My understanding is that some do and some don’t, just like non-asexuals. The term for not experiencing pleasure from sexual stimulation/orgasm is sexual anhedonia. July 23, 2022 at 11:37PM

/u/Hanjil_16 on Comment "yes" if you'd want this sticker.

Yes July 23, 2022 at 12:13AM

Is she a realistic option?

I (21M) met this girl (20F) on Bumble a week ago, and our conversation went really well on there. I ended up asking for her number but she added me on Snapchat instead because she said she doesn't like giving her number out. So we talked on there and asked if she was free this weekend which she said she's going home to a wedding but she's usually free on weekdays. I offered to meet at the park which she said yes to and so we ended up meeting there yesterday. Everything was great from the time we met to when everything was over. I tried being confident the entire time and was friendly to the families walking by us. We had conversations about school, work, etc. and she seemed comfortable being around me. In fact, she couldn't stop taking her eyes off me. She laughed and smiled at pretty much everything I said, and it was just good vibes all around. We didn't get real touchy or flirty, the only time she touched me was when I had a piece of grass on my shoulder and she

/u/TooHardToThinkOfName on I feel about sex the way I feel about mayo

I feel about sex the way I feel about flan. Uninteresting, unpleasant, and never on my mind. July 22, 2022 at 11:15PM

/u/MuuhRenai on i am aroace but fictional charcters are sometimes attractive?

I totally agree and feel the same ahsuqhs some characters are kinda hot. It's not like I wanted to do something with them but sure they're attractive af July 22, 2022 at 11:15PM

/u/kenumii on Does anyone else find their libido gross?? (Maybe NSFW, idrk)

Yes I hate it July 22, 2022 at 11:12PM

/u/RoseGoldLace on I need other peoples opinion on fictosexual

No I was trying to say the opposite. All the examples I gave are adults Thanks for telling me I wasn't clear. Edit: Sorry I wasn't clear in my first reply. I edited it to be more clear. 🥺 July 22, 2022 at 11:10PM

/u/Mecca1101 on I feel about sex the way I feel about mayo

I love mayo if it’s vegan. July 22, 2022 at 11:09PM

/u/AlligatorDreamy on I am sex repulsed and my girlfriend is not

A relationship can only "work out" if there is space between your boundaries and her needs. If you can't stand sex, you shouldn't have it; if she is persistently unhappy not having sex with you, then you've got an irreconcilable difference and should part ways. I realize that probably sounds extremely harsh, but irreconcilable differences will only get more bitter with time. Would you rather respectfully part now, bittersweet but as friends, or in several months when one or both of you has been miserable for some time over an issue you can't compromise? The only other alternative is nonmonogamy, but I struggle to recommend it because it usually doesn't work out well. July 22, 2022 at 12:20AM

Knowledge creates real connection

To anyone who takes the time to read this. I’m a 25 year old male who got out of the military about 3 years ago. As I transitioned I had a girl whom I was falling in love with. She ended up moving with me to South Carolina to grow there together. Since then the love has dimmed. We show signs of loving each other. However, late night thoughts show that it’s over for now. It has been about a year since we split from living together. Long story short. I’m only asking for advice on processing a love lost and moving into a rhythm to create another true bond. I do well with women who are happy single. Don’t know who else to ask for advice on building real love. Lost all my father figures. Wanna build connection again. Thanks for any reply in advance 🫡🫰🏽 Submitted July 22, 2022 at 12:10AM To anyone who takes the time to read this. I’m a 25 year old male who got out of the military about 3 years ago. As I transitioned I had a girl whom I was falling in love with. She ended up moving

(F22) Why does this always happen

I’m starting to feel super insecure about my looks and myself lately especially when it comes to dating! I have no problems flirting with people but it stops at that ( the flirting is always reciprocated) however no one ever asks for my number or even tries to go further than that. I end up having friends who flirt with me but never do more. Am I just not attractive ( people always say I’m a lot of fun soo I’d like to think my personality isn’t pushing ppl away) To add to this I’ve never been approached on a evening out (unless it’s by a creepy old person) and most of my friends have. Submitted July 22, 2022 at 12:13AM I’m starting to feel super insecure about my looks and myself lately especially when it comes to dating!I have no problems flirting with people but it stops at that ( the flirting is always reciprocated) however no one ever asks for my number or even tries to go further than that.I end up having friends who flirt with me but never do more. Am I just not attract

Welp looks like I’ve been ghosted

Well looks like I’m getting ghosted for the first time in my life. I (24m) believe I’m being ghosted by (24f) that I’ve been seeing/dating/hooking up with for the past month and a half. Just as things seemed to be heading towards a relationship, I haven’t heard back in days. This stuff sucks. I was finally starting to develop feelings for the first time since my ex after a year and a half Things seemed to be going perfect, but damn this stings Submitted July 22, 2022 at 12:14AM Well looks like I’m getting ghosted for the first time in my life. I (24m) believe I’m being ghosted by (24f) that I’ve been seeing/dating/hooking up with for the past month and a half.Just as things seemed to be heading towards a relationship, I haven’t heard back in days. This stuff sucks.I was finally starting to develop feelings for the first time since my ex after a year and a halfThings seemed to be going perfect, but damn this stings

/u/AuntChelle11 on "I know the Church broke me, but I don't feel broken."

You first. July 21, 2022 at 11:46PM

/u/sgt_esgiti on Anyone else have no family, friends or partner? Tips on how to cope please..

Hi and I'm sorry to hear about your past, but also happy that you're on the road to recovering from it. I also struggle a lot with being around people and getting close to them. If I spend to much time around others I get super exhausted and I'd rather be on my own. But here's the thing: it gets better with time, the more you hang around people, the more you'll get used to it! Only up to 3-4 years ago, when I really started to make friends and hang out with people more, after some time I'd start to hate seeing them, I'd make me feel empty, bored, anxious. I'd often disappear and cut all contact with them for weeks. Now, while I still have those issues and often need a break after being around people for too long, I actually enjoy being with my friends and I call or text them almost every day. So stay strong, get advice from your therapist, find good friends that will support you no matter what and you'll see things will get better. July 21, 20

How to flirt on a dating site?

I (24F) matched with a very cute guy (27M) on a "more serious" dating site and we have very similar values and interests and our conversation has been pretty organic and fluid. Except, now I feel like I'm in too deep and missed the opportunity to flirt! Any advice on flirting without it being too out of the blue and not sounding too creepy? Yes, I am as incompetent as I sound. Submitted July 21, 2022 at 02:14AM I (24F) matched with a very cute guy (27M) on a "more serious" dating site and we have very similar values and interests and our conversation has been pretty organic and fluid. Except, now I feel like I'm in too deep and missed the opportunity to flirt!Any advice on flirting without it being too out of the blue and not sounding too creepy? Yes, I am as incompetent as I sound.

/u/soakedace on What is an ace stereotype that you hate?

Lmao, had this one used against me and they just stammered and left after I told them I've identified as asexual for the last 13 years. (Since I was 19) July 21, 2022 at 01:06AM

How do you know if it’s a date or not ?

Me and this girl I met this weekend at a friends party have been texting the last few days. She’s big into yoga and I said I would love to do a class with her sometime. We’re trying to find a day that works for both of us but I’m just wondering if she thinks of it as a date or not. Our texts have been going well. She sends me long in depth texts and she has seemed flirty at times and interested but honestly I just don’t know. How can I find out? I can’t really ask her can I? I just don’t wanna go there thinking it’s a date if she doesn’t. Submitted July 21, 2022 at 01:07AM Me and this girl I met this weekend at a friends party have been texting the last few days. She’s big into yoga and I said I would love to do a class with her sometime. We’re trying to find a day that works for both of us but I’m just wondering if she thinks of it as a date or not. Our texts have been going well. She sends me long in depth texts and she has seemed flirty at times and interested but honestly I

/u/CubeWizard505 on What is an ace stereotype that you hate?

"For now" especially among teens July 21, 2022 at 12:37AM

First date help

I need help. I’m a 25 year old female who has never been on a first date. I started dating my first boyfriend when I was 17 and we stayed together until a couple years ago. I haven’t been on a date since that relationship ended, I needed to the time to focus on myself. However lately I am feeling ready to get into the dating world, but have no idea how to date. I am beyond nervous because I’ve been never really been on a first date, I have no idea what to talk about, how to act or date etiquette?? Please help a girl out Submitted July 21, 2022 at 12:10AM I need help. I’m a 25 year old female who has never been on a first date. I started dating my first boyfriend when I was 17 and we stayed together until a couple years ago. I haven’t been on a date since that relationship ended, I needed to the time to focus on myself. However lately I am feeling ready to get into the dating world, but have no idea how to date. I am beyond nervous because I’ve been never really been on a first d

Is it okay to ask a friend I like on a date through message, if it's the ONLY option I have?

I've finally gotten the motivation/courage to ask my friend out on a date, but unfortunately I don't have many options. We don't see each other during the week, we both work and only text one another afterwards. On the weekends though, we at times hang out and go out to the movies, clubs or out to eat somewhere. I was thinking of texting her to ask her out on a date this weekend, but I'm not sure if that's the appropriate way to do this. I haven't asked anyone out on a date, so I'm not sure. Also, she doesn't have my number so calling her isn't an option. None of my friends have my number, they all keep contact through social media. So calling her is definitely out of the picture here. I don't have many options here, so personally I think I'm gonna go through with texting her. But before I do anything, I have to ask: is this okay? Like I said, I don't have other options due to our busy schedule. I don’t have a chance to tell her in pe

/u/DunsFantasy on Ok but…

Brownies are really good! Tbh I love any food, but brownies takes the cake! (Hehe pun intended) July 20, 2022 at 12:17AM

Alpha Female - how to date?!

OK so... I've been struggling to find a bf cuz I'm a so-called alpha female. I'm pretty (there are tons of guys telling me this on the street, I had stalkers my entire life) I'm rich (my parents are $$$$... I get what I want.) I'm smart (my IQ exceeds 130...) I'm a professional (can't disclose my occupation online but... I hold a professional license) ​ I know I'm popular cuz everywhere I go, guys approach me even when I'm with other guys I've dated hundreds of men... But I just can't seem to find the right one without discounting myself... I want a meaningful relationship!! What/How can I have it?! Please no bs... Only want to hear from ppl who've been through this kinda lifestyle!! pls!! Submitted July 20, 2022 at 12:13AM OK so... I've been struggling to find a bf cuz I'm a so-called alpha female.I'm pretty (there are tons of guys telling me this on the street, I had stalkers my entire life)I'm rich (my

How badly did I muck this up post-first date?

I (25M) asked a former coworker (22F) out to lunch this past Saturday. She said yes and seemed pretty enthusiastic about it. We messaged through Instagram to set up a time and place, and the messages were a little spaced out the week leading up to it - anywhere from 6 hours apart to an entire day later - but we got things figured out and met up just fine. It seemed to go well, time was a little limited (I had to work that evening and she had plans with a friend anyway) but we had a nice hour long conversation over lunch and got to know each other better. We agreed it'd be great to go out again sometime, with her suggesting "something fun" in the college town not far from us. Sunday evening I sent a follow-up message saying thanks for lunch and reiterating interest in meeting again, and gave her my number - my dumbass didn't think to exchange numbers at lunch, which might be the first mistake. The message went unread all day Monday but I figured she's busy at wor

/u/belltyj on I posted when I got this skirt a few days ago and you guys said it needed some more purple so I did the thing 🥰🖤🤍💜

She 😉 July 19, 2022 at 11:14PM

/u/Ditmecongsan-77 on I posted when I got this skirt a few days ago and you guys said it needed some more purple so I did the thing 🥰🖤🤍💜

Imagine some guys would think he is sexy. 🤣🤣🥲🥲🥲 July 19, 2022 at 11:12PM

Really upset but confused

The guy I’m dating and I were talking about something important and he was trying to warn me about the dangerous people I used to be associated with, and if I stuck Around they would’ve hurt me. he was explaining how he knows from his own personal traumatic childhood. I was getting frustrated about it so I said I didn’t want to hear it anymore, and I didn’t mean about his life but about my wrong judgment which was my mistake, then he got really mad because he felt like I wasn’t listening and said before he hung up that he hopes they r*pe me. For some reason this really upset me and I’m almost hysterically crying and couldn’t stop for awhile. We have spoken since and he sincerely apologized. I know he didn’t mean it but idk why thinking about him saying that hurt me so much. Like if someone else said that I’d be like screw them. Or maybe be upset by it but I don’t understand my hysterical crying. I’m not sure if my reaction is an overreaction and if it is, why? I also am not sure if th

Great date, but chatting afterward's been… odd?

Thanks in advance for the help. I went on a date last Thursday, it went really well. We went to an old-timey arcade, then out to dinner, then chatted at a bar until closing. I walked her to her apartment and we kissed. We were out for about 7 hours altogether. We’ve been chatting since then and it’s generally gone well, except for a few things: We’re flirting and the conversation has generally gone well, but when I brought up a 2nd date, she kinda dodged by asking another question. I think it’s just that she’s not ready to commit to a second date yet, either because she’s not sure or because she’s going out of town this week and wants to wait to see if she has time when she gets back on the weekend. She may also just be trying to keep me going/keep the conversation going. What do you all think it is? She hasn’t responded to my last message, and it’s been about a day. ( link to last message here ) Do you think it’s appropriate to text again, either something lighthearted or trying a

(32M)Fresh out of a 6 year relationship. The game has changed and its kinda shocking.

My last relationship made me distant from all my friends it had me so busy and i dont have much going on in real life due to that. Ive tried a few dating sites and of course tinder. But here is where im confused, why are so many women demanding money? Were on a dating site but over half of the women i talk with ruin it by looking at men as an income. Its the equivalent of an unwanted dick pic in my mind. Rant over. Submitted July 19, 2022 at 01:15AM My last relationship made me distant from all my friends it had me so busy and i dont have much going on in real life due to that. Ive tried a few dating sites and of course tinder. But here is where im confused, why are so many women demanding money? Were on a dating site but over half of the women i talk with ruin it by looking at men as an income. Its the equivalent of an unwanted dick pic in my mind. Rant over.

/u/SubstantialHentai420 on not this again

Tried that. Still ace. July 19, 2022 at 12:24AM

/u/RecognitionExotic960 on not this again

Seriously like, why are they so bothered by our existence July 19, 2022 at 12:24AM

I’m (28F) having a hard time giving him (29M) space- help

We have known each other for about 3-4 years, starting off as friends that have slowly developed to more. One thing led to another and we have been living together for a little over 6 months. The last few weeks or so we’ve been having a really hard time. Due to some explosive family drama on my end(a clingy, controlling, borderline abusive, ill parent causing problems), he moved out. Not by choice, but necessity. It’s definitely been a downswing for us. I’ve been incredibly anxious, angry, and stressed while trying to sort my life out in the aftermath. We’ve been fighting non-stop. He asked for space, but given how abrupt and chaotic everything has been, I’ve been having a hard time giving him that and he’s been angry with me. I know it hasn’t helped the situation at all. I have some major childhood trauma and family dynamic issues I’ve been trying to work through independently and with counseling. I have a long way to go, but I am trying. This whole situation has triggered some ab

texting while in ldr

we only have a month left of long distance. we decided to be exclusive before he left but not official. he hasn’t replied to me in almost 2 days. the last 3 months I’ve known him we have texted at least once a day. do I wait until he texts me or just text him? do I just start a convo or ask if everything is okay? how do I set a boundary that texting/checking in is something I need in a relationship? Submitted July 19, 2022 at 12:15AM we only have a month left of long distance. we decided to be exclusive before he left but not official.he hasn’t replied to me in almost 2 days. the last 3 months I’ve known him we have texted at least once a day.do I wait until he texts me or just text him? do I just start a convo or ask if everything is okay? how do I set a boundary that texting/checking in is something I need in a relationship?

I just went on my first date and I’m worried he doesn’t like me.

So I (18F) matched with this guy (20M) on bumble 3 weeks ago. We’ve been talking nonstop every day and today was our first date. We went out for dinner and then went exploring on some trails in the woods. Dinner lasted 2 hours and the final hour was spent walking around. Honestly I had the best time ever, until my period decided to start while we were in the middle of the trail. I asked if we could turn back because my cramps were really bad and it hurt to walk. On the walk back to his car I had to stop walking and he offered to go get his car. (He knew why I couldn’t walk) I was mortified and super embarrassed but he was a complete gentleman about it. He dropped me off at home and left. I really really like this guy but I’m so scared that I fucked it up. Submitted July 18, 2022 at 01:14AM So I (18F) matched with this guy (20M) on bumble 3 weeks ago. We’ve been talking nonstop every day and today was our first date.We went out for dinner and then went exploring on some tra

/u/GFMCarvalho on What are some things that happened to you in the past that, after looking back, makes you say "yeah, that was a sign that i'm on the spectrum" ???

I was a tutor for my university a few years ago, and when my working hour was ending, another class would Begin. So it was natural that a few students showed up earlier(since almost nobody went to the tutoring, I didn't pay it any mind). There was a girl that occasionally appeared for her class, and we would talk when no one was there for the tutoring. One day we were talking and it was almost the time for her class to star and she asked me to follow her and went to somewhere with no one around. She looked me in the eyes and I just kept chatting about anything. Then I looked at my clock and said: "Oh, your class is starting, you should hurry. Bye" and gave her a kiss in the cheek(custom where I leave, even if you are not very close to someone). She didn't appear after that, and I kinda feel bad about it, but I was just talking to her like I would with anyone, didn't desire anything else. That's what came to my mind after reading your question. July 1