So I'm now a 26M. Since I was around 15, I've been fully in love with 2 people. Once broke my heart and cheated on me on prom night, and the other was a girl that was my best friend for 4 years, which never became anything more. Since then, I always found myself reminiscing about one or the other, and how much I truly loved each of them. From the emotional pain of each, I stopped looking for any relationships. I lost all interest in dating and in turn started to lose some self-esteem. Because of this lack of emotional attachment, I ended up becoming super close with my friends, which made me kind of emotionally dependant on them. One friend in particular and I would always hang out, go out, etc. His then girlfriend got super jealous and basically wrecked havoc upon our friendship because she thought we were too close... I still have some trauma from being called in the middle of the night being yelled at, or having to defend myself for actions that weren't wrong. This las...