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Showing posts from May 30, 2020

My parents don't trust me to have a computer or phone in my room and it makes me upset. (18F)

My parents have always had this rule of "no technology in your room." Okay, fine, that was good when we were younger. As I got older my parents had more kids and we moved into a very large, very beautiful house, and my bedroom (which I am very happy with) is on the second floor. Not having technology soon became a bit of a nuisance, because my room is awesome and I love being able to spend time there. Furthermore, we have two baby siblings who scream and break everything. We've been in the house for a little over a year now and I turned 18 last November. My parents allowed me to use a SCHOOL ISSUED computer in my room for homework purposes, but I had to plug it in downstairs at night. On top of this, while I have been diligent in following the rules, (I plug my phone and computer in by the kitchen, my mom checks most nights) my brother (15M) does not give a RAT'S ASS about the rules. Before the quarantine he would bring his phone into his room, he's be up late

I [25/F] don't know if he [23/M] is still interested in me

Hey everyone, I (25F) started casually seeing a guy last October. He's a pilot from the west coast, and I live in NY. His flights are all on the east coast and I met him through a dating app- he occasionally stays in hotels overnight around my area. We've been texting every day since we matched on the app last year. However, we've only hung out twice in person, the last time being in November. It's difficult to see each other because of our distance and the fact that he's been on a leave of absence from work. Our conversations are pretty lackluster, partially due to COVID (being quarantined with nothing to do). I've told him that we should meet up again soon and he agrees, but hasn't made a real effort to try to hang out. He wants to fly me to his state but he's not very proactive about making set plans. We haven't been dating or hooking up with other people since we've met (at least this is what he tells me). He goes out a lot, but I don'

Me [20, M] being bored with relationship with my [19, F] girlfriend of 2.5 years during pandemics.

Hello! I am writing this post because I feel exhausted by "status quo" in my relationship due to pandemics. My problem is routine. We see each other about 3-4 times a week, and we do almost the same stuff - talking and watching movies, going for a brief walks. I am afraid that our future life would look like this and this exhausts me. I have absolutely boring life now, nothing happens, I study, sleep, play video games and that's it. I think, that I might have OCD, my symptoms are the same as my mother's and she is diagnosed with it. Another important thing - soon my girlfriend is going to have final exams before going to the university. She is totally stressed out and focused on it. I am really struggling because I try my best to motivate her etc, but I lack affection for most of the time as she cant think about anything else but her exams. I dont blame her to be clear, but I am feeling lonely a bit now. Our sex life got worse, we have sex once a week, but its beca

How do I (27F) address or deal with my BF's (28M) silent treatment and insecurities?

My BF (28M) and I (27F) have dated for 4 years. He has a number of deep-rooted insecurities that cause his depression. It frequently develops into a tornado of self-loathing which he internalizes and then shuts people out, mostly me. We have started months of couples therapy as his negative internalizing has caused many arguments between us. We have been addressing and making efforts about getting him to be vulnerable and verbalize his feelings and communicate what he wants. Our communication skills have gotten much better, but it's still frustrating for me to be patient with his withdrawal and ignoring especially when we live together now and are discussing getting married. I frequently will not know what he is upset about until days later, so for the time being, he will do the passive-aggressive "I'm fine" and walk away from me or ignore me. I am trying to be sensitive to his depression, but after years of being lied to about what he is feeling and being given t

A former friend just contacted me. How should I go about this?

I worked with her a while back. We became good friends. There was an attraction and energy but it never went there. She moved away, got married and started a family but we kept in touch. It started getting awkward for me because she never introduced me to her husband and I guess wanted to keep our friendship separate. But this always was in the back of my mind every time we talked so one day I brought it up. I forget how I started the convo but I remember she was annoyed by it and said something like I have another guy best friend too, and my husband knows I have ‘my friends’ and he’s ok with that. That wasn’t my issue though. And maybe this is my hang up or insecurity but I feel slighted that I’m kept separate. I was raised that when someone gets married, especially if its a man and woman friendship, things will change and I’ve told her that I would like to meet her husband (at least over the phone) and talk and get to know him...like hey man, I’m your wife’s friend. I mean if I wer

I[22F] brought up a past resolved issue to my [23M] boyfriend and I don’t know what to say to resolve

Recently, I had to stop taking my anti-depressants due to losing work related- insurance from to covid-19, but am waiting on Government assistant. I created an issue through text message with my boyfriend that was already resolved. I am hoping someone can send me some words of wisdom on what I can say to him resolve this. I was trying to explain my emotions to him about how I’m unsure of certain actions he had made. Granted, I support his decisions as it is his and I love him and I don’t really have a say in what he wants to do as he is his own person. He wanted me to stop intruding on what he does or where he goes as it’s annoying which I understand. I ended up following up with a past petty example of well if I let you do what you want without questioning it, you’ll end up paying for a hooker. (Too which he did, but the issue was resolved because I believe people can be forgiven for mistakes, but never forgotten.) I said something to petty and immature and this has lead him to n

UPDATE: Letting Men Pay?

Hey everyone. Thanks for the advice in my first post. Original Post: https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/gsjjba/letting_men_pay/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share I wanna start by saying that my date went really well! I was pretty nervous since it was my first time doing this, but all I can say is thank goodness for alcohol lol. He was really sweet and very accommodating of my nerves and we had a really nice meal and conversation. I actually brought up the topic of paying for the date and what his thoughts were. I even showed him this thread haha. His opinion was that he really liked getting to pay for his date because it made him feel confident and likes to spoil his date. He said in his experience his dates have either not let him pay in full or have expected him to do it. He said his ideal is the woman being capable and willing to pay for herself but happy to let him cover it, which in turn makes him happy. I let him pay for dinner like he wanted but I secr

Does this make me fake? Am I just feeling regret?

A few days ago I was just surfing through the Internet on my phone until I suddenly thought of an old crush of mine from six years ago. In hopes of reaching out to him and wanting to see how he was doing in life, I searched him up on google to try and find any of his social media. Instead, what came up was his obituary. I was shocked and saddened. I think I was in denial of it too at first because I just didn’t want to believe it. I started crying and couldn’t sleep properly that night. He died about 2 and 1/2 years ago and I didn’t even know. I wanted closure on this, so I of course did the mentally- healthy thing and talked to a close relative about it, and so did feel better when I did, but for some reason, I still haven’t been able to get this off of mine. Him and I weren’t close or anything, but we did have a few small talks here and there. He used to call me “Rue” because to him, I looked like the little girl from Hunger Games. Plus, I hadn’t seen or spoken to him since 2014. I

I'm crushing on 2 people at the same time

I like a guy, I don't know him that well but we have good chemistry and I could see us in a relationship, I really like his mind . But lately he says he is busy and kind of ignores me. At the same time I am thinking about my best friend as.... more than friends, I have been thinking about it for a long time but never acted on it. I feel I'm sometimes crushing on my friend and sometimes it's just a very strong friendship. I don't know what to do. (I haven't even kiss any of them, I want to make a choice and then go for it) Any advice? Submitted May 30, 2020 at 11:48PM I like a guy, I don't know him that well but we have good chemistry and I could see us in a relationship, I really like his mind . But lately he says he is busy and kind of ignores me. At the same time I am thinking about my best friend as.... more than friends, I have been thinking about it for a long time but never acted on it. I feel I'm sometimes crushing on my friend and sometimes it

Felling confused about texting with two people at once.

So, I'm (f22) feeling really confused right now. I'm texting with one guy (25) on Instagram, we meet on an online app. We quite like each other, we spoke a little bit on the phone, but mostly texting. We also agreed that we want to meet up when he's back in town. So lately I started texting with the guy (26) from my university. I must admit I had a little crush on him since we first met. We have a group project together so that's why we speaking more now. We also had video chats with other people and all that stuff. And here is a funny thing, we were kind of flirting today and also my friend found him on tinder so I know he's single. Here's my question is it okay for me to be texting with both of this people. I'm not exclusive with the first guy we didn't even met in the first place. I really don't want to give him any hope, but also I'm not sure if the guy from my school is in any way interested in me. The thing is I was fine, and pretty sure I

I bet I have the most confusing crush EVER! Help?

Hey everyone! I (F,22) could really use some help SMH... I’ll try to keep this post as short as possible. Who am I kidding, it's gonna be freaking long. So basically, I need your opinion/advice on what you think his (M, 18) actions say. I’m beyond confused at this point...Maybe I’m in denial? Who knows. Quick backstory: I know this guy for about 7 years now. We used to go to school together (small school, grades 7,8 & 9 put together). I had a crush on him for most of those 7 years (still do kinda). We had our ups and downs (long crazy story). Now, he never made an actual move on me and vis versa. Not that I noticed anyway? (Unless playing with my hair and childish “games” are flirting?) I’d like to say he didn’t make a move because of his age, and his home situation (he couldn’t really afford a lot and lives a few hours away). Everyone in my class knew I was into him (including the teachers LOL). A few years ago I kept asking him if he likes me back, his answer always was ”

How do I convince myself anyone could ever love me?

I’ve never had anyone be more than briefly interested in me. I’ve begun to think there’s something wrong with me, and I see nothing but evidence it’s true. I wish I could do more than just fantasize about someone actually wanting me Submitted May 30, 2020 at 11:59PM I’ve never had anyone be more than briefly interested in me. I’ve begun to think there’s something wrong with me, and I see nothing but evidence it’s true. I wish I could do more than just fantasize about someone actually wanting me

Is quarantine making me go crazy or is a greater power directing me towards this woman?? Please help.

So... I don't even know where to begin. Someone help. Im an 20 year old female from the UK and I've always been 'bi-curious' so to say, and have had a slight attraction to older women. Despite the curiosity, I have never been with a woman before and have always viewed it as a fantasy of mine. However, during lockdown here in the UK on our weekly clap for the NHS I've noticed a neighbour that I've never noticed before who lives crossed the road. I assume she lives alone since she's the only one that comes out every week and would say she is in her late 40's. Anyways, that's besides the point. What I'm trying to get at is that I don't know why or how but I keep feeling this sort of force directing me towards this woman. I know it sounds crazy and at first I just thought it was a coincidence, but week in and out she would just look at me with this endearing look in her eyes smiling and not look away until I started to awkwardly giggle and then

What do I do if I’m not what she expected?

I’m 13 and recently started dating in my first real relationship I just asked out this girl 5 days ago she turns 13 in July and I turn 14 in june, she’s amazing and cute and super nice to me. She knows what I look like and knows about all my problems but I feel like she has a false image about my weight. I’m not morbidly obese but I’m not average either, what if we go on our date and I’m not what she imagined at all? Submitted May 31, 2020 at 12:03AM I’m 13 and recently started dating in my first real relationshipI just asked out this girl 5 days ago she turns 13 in July and I turn 14 in june, she’s amazing and cute and super nice to me. She knows what I look like and knows about all my problems but I feel like she has a false image about my weight. I’m not morbidly obese but I’m not average either, what if we go on our date and I’m not what she imagined at all?

/u/pull_the_other_one on Just want to show off my new ring! Just a few dozen evolutions away from a dragon ;)

So sorry to hear about your sister's skink. I got the ring from a seller on Taobao , I'm not sure how easy it'd be to buy from there internationally, try googling "how to buy from taobao" and your country. If it's too difficult let me know and I can help to get it - the ring itself is super cheap (~US$5) , but shipping might be 4-5 times the price. It costed me (~US$7) just to ship to HK. Still waaay worth it tho. May 31, 2020 at 12:07AM

/u/januaryrainstorm on I made a charm thingy/zipper pull!

I love the dragon! May 30, 2020 at 11:55PM

/u/94Usernames32taken on I made a charm thingy/zipper pull!

So awesome and that dragon is just perfect! May 30, 2020 at 11:50PM

/u/SatiricalManiac on I’m having a hard time with the fact that i could be asexual. I wish I was like everyone else and this just makes me feel weird and wrong. What can I do to change the fact that I’m like this?

I feel the same way and as far as I know, there isn't any real way. There might be some sort of hormonal treatment but that's a doctor question. May 30, 2020 at 11:44PM

/u/SatiricalManiac on Should an ace come out?

Depends on surroundings. I just didn't treat it as coming out and it went fine. May 30, 2020 at 11:41PM

/u/_Neo_politan on So these guys made a song called ace and there's a shitload of aphobic comments, I took only one because they're so MUCH

I went and looked at this and honestly i was so pissed off, if you look now someone has responded to that ass hole and I have never been happier that people are standing up to those kinds of people. May 30, 2020 at 11:39PM

/u/Polalaka on it has been brought to my attention that maple means acer in Latin

The trees are called acer trees in the UK at least May 30, 2020 at 11:36PM

/u/some_strange_circus on Should an ace come out?

There are a whooooooooole lot of people out there who are offended by anything that is different from them. May 30, 2020 at 11:20PM

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https://ift.tt/36MZIV2 Submitted May 30, 2020 at 11:36PM https://ift.tt/36MZIV2