Good analogy August 04, 2022 at 12:40AM

Went out on a first date on Sunday. The following day, she told me through text that she had a nice time and would be down to go out again. Great, right? I try to set up plans for Saturday. She's unavailable for Saturday and is away all week after that and and she says she wants to look at the following weekend. Sure, I'm around. How about Friday or Saturday? My August is pretty quiet. I also offered for her to just let me know when she's available to sort of give her an out if she changed her mind and doesn't want to go out again. Then she says she "should" be back by Saturday. We had a nice time so it's just a bummer to be uncertain and be left off with a "should". And I can't send any texts to her next week because I don't want to bother her when she's away (and she didn't say what "away" means). I feel like she's had enough time by now to just say she had a nice time but didn't feel a connection. But I...

Not sure if it's your style, but I get the "ace vibes" (please don't ever let me uses that term again) from a lot of Black Metal. Raserey der Krampen is one of my favorites. Fair warning: screaming vocals and disturbing imagery. August 03, 2022 at 11:49PM

Agreed. And yeah you’re right aesthetic attraction can be especially doubtful when the attraction is towards something that is often sexualised. It makes you think “people are normally sexually attracted to this and i clearly am attracted to it in some way so does that mean this is sexual attraction ?” kind of thing August 03, 2022 at 11:48PM

They think it impossible not to want sex. Remember kids, heavy British accent "Some people don't want tea, so don't force them to drink your tea." August 03, 2022 at 11:46PM

Pretty much what I’m on about. If we have such similar experiences as two ace people with the same disorder, it makes more sense that two people who both independently decided we were ace, then doubted and have the same disorder are, in fact, ace, than aren’t. And it’s especially bad when aesthetic attraction includes things…frequently sexualized, we’ll say. August 03, 2022 at 11:46PM

The spirit of ace was trapped inside the ring and it broke free August 03, 2022 at 11:45PM