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Showing posts from December 20, 2019

My boyfriend watches porn and masturbates, but had stopped initiating sex with me.

So pretty much what the title says. He just doesn’t initiate sex anymore (he used to A LOT), and when he’s horny, instead of doing so, he’ll look at subreddits such as r/gonewild or r/holdthemoan and masturbate. Now, it’s never really been an issue for me when partners watch porn, but it’s starting to be a blow to my self-confidence. I’ve gained a little weight, as well as experienced a kind of traumatizing event, and since I’ve been feeling really un-sexy and this isn’t helping. He’s up for it most of the time when I want to, but I just don’t look like the girls on those subreddits, so I think that’s why it makes me feel weird. Again, I really don’t mind him watching porn most of the time, but I feel like he prefers it to me now. What should I do? Submitted December 21, 2019 at 12:26AM So pretty much what the title says. He just doesn’t initiate sex anymore (he used to A LOT), and when he’s horny, instead of doing so, he’ll look at subreddits such as r/gonewild or r/holdthe

Women of /r/sex, do you like it when you suck on a male person's penis?

No text found Submitted December 21, 2019 at 12:26AM No text found

Just realized my husband is abusive, and will never change.

To be fair, he only hits me when he drinks. He only tells me I’m nothing, worthless as a human being, so on and so forth, when he drinks. He’s said he’ll quit drinking, but he’s said it before and not meant it. He said he loves me and he’s sorry, but he’s said it before... and because he hasn’t changed, I know he never meant it. You don’t hurt someone you love. You don’t really love someone if you intentionally hurt them. I’m not sure what is different this time that has made me realize that I’m not the love of his life - just a convenient target who is great at stuffing down trauma, and who will keep running the house and doing his laundry regardless of whether or not I feel like I’m dying inside. At least he was kind enough to ask me what I want for Christmas, less than a week prior, right? Submitted December 21, 2019 at 12:09AM To be fair, he only hits me when he drinks. He only tells me I’m nothing, worthless as a human being, so on and so forth, when he drinks.He’s sa

When to text back after getting cancelled on?

We had a date setup and the morning of she told she wouldn’t be able to make it because she had family visiting which I felt was understandable so all I said was “It’s ok I understand just let me know when you’re free again” and she responds “okay, I’m sorry” but I said it was ok. It’s been two days and she hasn’t hit me up when before then we would talk every day with her initiating conversation at least half the time. Sorry I’m just confused. Submitted December 20, 2019 at 11:55PM We had a date setup and the morning of she told she wouldn’t be able to make it because she had family visiting which I felt was understandable so all I said was “It’s ok I understand just let me know when you’re free again” and she responds “okay, I’m sorry” but I said it was ok. It’s been two days and she hasn’t hit me up when before then we would talk every day with her initiating conversation at least half the time. Sorry I’m just confused.

How does a lonely 55 year old male find the right woman?

I haven't been in an intimate relationship since the '80s, and I haven't asked a woman out since I was in my late thirties - I decided to stop trying as a means of self-preservation when I realized that I take rejection worse than most people. My hope was that if a relationship was going to happen, it would happen naturally, but it never has. I've been on a handful of really bad blind dates (my friends for some reason only try to set me up with overweight women, which I'm not attracted to) and dating sites and apps have not worked out for me. I'm only average in the looks department, but I'm physically above average (5'10" 175 lbs and work out most days). I'm in a position to retire and buy some land in the country, but I can't see myself doing so without a significant other by my side. I'm curious to read your thoughts and advice. Submitted December 20, 2019 at 11:56PM I haven't been in an intimate relationship since the '

Do you men view the length of time they’ve been dating someone as much as women do?

Do men think about the length of time they’ve been dating someone, just as much as women do? Are you conscious of how long you’ve been “dating” without becoming official or moving things forward? Submitted December 21, 2019 at 12:09AM Do men think about the length of time they’ve been dating someone, just as much as women do?Are you conscious of how long you’ve been “dating” without becoming official or moving things forward?

Texting between dates, scheduling, and the holidays.

Hey /r/dating_advice , This past Wednesday I (20M) went on a date with this girl (F20). we went to an old book store and walked around our city for 3 hours. We had to cut it short because both of us had things we had to do so we split up pretty quickly but afterwards I texted her about how I had a good time and she replied the same thing. I want to go on another day with her, however I just went home (3 hours away) for the holidays and I won't be back until Thursday. I texted her a little bit the day after, just a general good morning and sent her a song because on our date we talked about our favorite artists. She said she would give it a listen and I told her to let me know what she thinks when she does. That has been the extent of our conversation, I don't think either of us are very big texters. I want to ask her out on a second date but I don't know when I should do it. I feel like setting up a date over a week in advance is wise, and I also don't want to have

My people...y’all need to relax!

I have seen so many posts about people not knowing about to approach someone you find attractive. Relax, everyone is nervous about meeting new people and getting rejected, it’s a universal human feeling. Relax... Just want to say, I am a male, 26, 5’9”, not super ripped but not fat (workout daily), not gorgeous but not ugly, not rich but not poor....super average dude here. Been in 2 long term relationships and a few short term. Just never worked out and back into dating. You have to be willing to embarrass yourself...more often then not I’m dancing terribly (which I’m super self conscious about btw, but I do it anyways) and I’ll notice a girl giggling at me or something and I’ll go up and say “Hi, glad you liked my dance moves!” Or I’ll go up to a girl I find attractive and say “Hey how are you doing?” It’s not that hard to say Hi to someone...no one likes the “cool” guy eye fucking someone from across the room all night...it’s creepy and stalker like. If the person isn’t intereste

Is a guy trying to tell you something, when he does this, if so... what?

If you are in conversation in a group of four people, but he is holding your gaze for about 15 seconds, you look down and look back up again three times, he is still holding your gaze. It's not a zoned out look, he is staring into your eyes?I am confused by his behaviour and not the most confident person - I don't assume people are interested, but there was something in the fact he held my gaze even when I looked down several times. Basically I want to know if this is a definite sign of interest, or whether it could mean something else. Submitted December 21, 2019 at 12:25AM If you are in conversation in a group of four people, but he is holding your gaze for about 15 seconds, you look down and look back up again three times, he is still holding your gaze. It's not a zoned out look, he is staring into your eyes?I am confused by his behaviour and not the most confident person - I don't assume people are interested, but there was something in the fact he held my g

Why are relationships so problamatic these days?

Divorces are high, lots of married couples aren't happy, break ups happen constantly, a lot of men struggle to get into a relationship in the first place, there are plenty of single parents, and cheating is a big issue on both sides. These are a few things I noticed, and it seems rare to be in a genuine relashionship with someone for a long time. Am I seeing things, or is this actually happening? Submitted December 21, 2019 at 12:30AM Divorces are high, lots of married couples aren't happy, break ups happen constantly, a lot of men struggle to get into a relationship in the first place, there are plenty of single parents, and cheating is a big issue on both sides. These are a few things I noticed, and it seems rare to be in a genuine relashionship with someone for a long time. Am I seeing things, or is this actually happening?

Kinda confused on what to do

Ok so I am a 16years old boy and this is my first time doing this sort of stuff with a girl.I met this girl who’s 17 at a party last week. I ended up DMing her a couple days later and we went a movie which was fun and we got along decently. Then I messaged her two days later we agreed to hook up again. But this time it was a bit awkward and quiet. I’m not sure if asking her to hang out again would seem too much as I’ve asked her to hang out the first two times and the second time was more awkward than the first. Should I wait for her to message me or do I message her again? Submitted December 21, 2019 at 12:32AM Ok so I am a 16years old boy and this is my first time doing this sort of stuff with a girl.I met this girl who’s 17 at a party last week. I ended up DMing her a couple days later and we went a movie which was fun and we got along decently. Then I messaged her two days later we agreed to hook up again. But this time it was a bit awkward and quiet. I’m not sure if asking

OLD going hilariously badly

Some people reacted sort of angrily last time I wrote about being a woman getting no matches online, and I'm really not trying to dismiss anyone else's experiences, but this is true for me and I guess I feel like sharing somewhere. I gave up on Tinder because, matches or no matches, I just don't like that app. And now I seem to have broken OkCupid. (In fairness, I did chat with one very cool guy, but we turned out to want wildly different things, so we left it at that). I may be swiping wildly out of my league, or I'm not my type's type, or some combination thereof, but I really don't think I'm going to get lucky on there; I seem to have worked my way through all the eligible options, and the match suggestions are now not just increasingly out of my stated age range and/or residing in the neighbouring country, some of them are in the next country over. Once that happens, is there any reason to continue hanging around? (OLD noob asking). Submitted Dece

My year in dating: age 30 (the bits I forgot to mention 1/3)

I wrote a post a couple of months ago detailing the shitshow I ran trying to date between my 29th and 30th birthdays. I was thinking solely in terms of situations where I'd set out to date someone, and therefore missed out three things which would fall under the category of "love life". The first of which would be: Wasn't a date #1: GM, 26th February Last night I met the man I've been dreaming of for 6 months. Before I met him, having flown 2500 miles to another continent to meet him, he text me was I interested in a threesome. What I said was "it's not a no, but it's not a yes right now either." What I should have said was "I flew all this way because I'm in love with you. But clearly I got this wrong." Now, the day after I arrived as good as unannounced, he's gone travelling with a "friend" around the country, to a mountain range in the north, and I wasn't invited. I'm wondering around his city, as I'

How dare a woman be studying and not sending nudes? Preposterous. It’s really not fair for the guys.

https://ift.tt/2ZchmOq Submitted December 20, 2019 at 11:54PM https://ift.tt/2ZchmOq

I think I’m in love with my best friend?

This is a really confusing post to me as first of all I’m not sure what love really is and also because I’m a man and my best friend is a man and I’ve known myself to be, without a doubt, straight. I get really excited when he sends me messages and he’s basically one of the only persons whose messages I open instantly. Whenever he feels like going out I’m always the first person he asks to join him before asking if I’d want to get other people to come over too. Sometimes he insists on going out to dinner with just me and it’s like a date with us just talking then fighting over who pays the bills. I didn’t realize it until now but I miss him when he’s not here. Writing this has my legs all clenched up and what I feel is just indescribable. I feel like it’s weird but I imagined scenarios where I’d sometimes wake up next to him or he’d wake me up with the biggest hug ever. I don’t think I’ve ever thought of him in a sexual way. Basically I feel like I want to spend every single one

I (m,29) am ALWAYS rejected after the first date. What am I doing wrong?

Seriously, I've lost count, but over the last 5 years I've been rejected the best part of 30 times (each time after the first date.) It's strange because I don't lack social skills. I have plenty of friends. People tell me that I'm good looking. I've even had both men and women tell me that they're surprised I'm single. And I think the women I go on dates with actually like me as well. But it's ALWAYS "It was lovely to meet you... but I got more of a friendship than romantic kind of feeling". And these aren't just outliers - it's every single woman I go on a date with! I mean, I'm told I'm good looking - and I realise that for women it's about much more than just looks. But I'm also educated, i have a professional job, I have interests, and a social life, and plenty of male and female friends. But no one is interested in me romantically. I'm nearly 30 and yet I've never had a girlfriend (although I'

Getting together with a co worker

20M So There is a girl I work with and she was always super sweet and i enjoyed working with her and so We flirted and what not at our work party and eventually that led to a hook up and she said she’d want to get together after the holidays when she’s back in town. Expect I can’t stop my fucking anxiety over this. I’ve had a couple sexual partners but nothings progressed past just sex or whatever and I don’t want this to happen again. I’ve never dated expect for, idk if this counts but a couple month long distance fling that just fucked me up. Part of me feels like she might just not be trying to let me down so hard or whatever but also she literally said yes to getting together again idk my minds just been racing over this. Idk really what to do I guess just wait. We ran around downtown for hours that night just fucking around and having fun and it was so exciting it was the first time I really felt interested and excited in someone in a while it’s just my anxiety over it is killi

Do Ghosters feel any guilt?

What goes through your mind when you are ghosting someone? Submitted December 21, 2019 at 12:14AM What goes through your mind when you are ghosting someone?

Is depression always a turn off? (men)

If you’re talking to a girl and you find out that she is struggling with depression, but is also doing her best to get better and overcome it (not wallowing in self pity or expecting you to be her therapist) would you still consider dating her? Despite my depression I feel like I still have a lot to offer - a lot of love to give - but sometimes I do struggle. Would you date someone as described? Why or why not? Submitted December 21, 2019 at 12:14AM If you’re talking to a girl and you find out that she is struggling with depression, but is also doing her best to get better and overcome it (not wallowing in self pity or expecting you to be her therapist) would you still consider dating her? Despite my depression I feel like I still have a lot to offer - a lot of love to give - but sometimes I do struggle.Would you date someone as described? Why or why not?

First dates. What to do? How to handle the "let's be friends" thing.

So it's been a while since I've dated. Went on a date from an app. On the app we had long exchanges. Just got back from the first date. It went great, or so I thought. We talked for hours. I made her laugh. Overall seemed like a good time. At the end I asked for her number. She gave it to me, but said to be friends next time we meet. I'm thinking maybe it was a good friendly time, but maybe I played it too cautiously? But this was the first date and I had just met her for the first time off an app. I thought being too aggressive would be weird and creepy. But to be honest, I don't know how to go about going for a kiss on a first date anyway. Had there been "chemistry," maybe the moment would've been obvious? I suppose I may have been blinded by the good conversation to realize that she wasn't having it, romatically speaking. But I've never had a date in the past that I've misread like this. Usually I was acutely aware of the date's inte

Are hotel bars better than normal bars?

Hi all, just wondering if hotel bars are better /different than normal bars for meting potential dates? I have seen some very fancily dressed women in the hotels near me where as the bars will have everybody and their cat :-) Submitted December 21, 2019 at 12:20AM Hi all, just wondering if hotel bars are better /different than normal bars for meting potential dates? I have seen some very fancily dressed women in the hotels near me where as the bars will have everybody and their cat :-)

/u/Brilliant_scammer on Does anyone else get grossed out by PDA?

I'm fine with holding hands, though it seems too vanilla to me. But romantic hugging/kissing... nah. I recently witnessed two friends who I didn't know got together start kissing in public and my first instinctive response was to protect the girl from being "harassed" before I even realized she didn't object lol. December 21, 2019 at 12:14AM

/u/HelenFH on my friend gave me this as a christmas gift!

Oh no, I mean the material that it's made of. Sorry if my question was confusing. December 21, 2019 at 12:01AM