Reddit isn't exactly my ideal place to vent about it but I have no where else to go. We've been married for 3 years. ​ I've been raising her son like hes my own since he was 6 months old (hes 5 now) and I love him to death. Hes my son... I see him no other way. For a while I felt like things were going really good. we had this great relationship. The last 2 years though have been rough. She was miserable working and being away from our boy. I felt like, well... a lot of women do it but I kind of agreed with her that it would be better if she could be home. For a bunch of reasons - her happiness, his development, the fact that I could focus on my work which I was being pulled away from all the time as the one home with him... So, even though she made more money we decided to make it happen. She quit her job and I knew that if my business couldn't bring in enough I'd have to take a 2nd job. But I felt like it would be worth it if it would make her happier. I s

We’ve been married 8.5 years. For the last 2.5 years she’s been taking care of her dad & grandpa. They both have Alzheimer’s. As you can imagine, this has been a lot of work for her. During this time she’s checked out of our relationship. Special things she used to do for me doesn’t happen anymore. Not decreased, just gone. She’s not even acting like a roommate. I work full time, pay all of our bills, pay a lot of the care for her family, have been doing most of the house care in our home. Been there for her. I am tired of this. I am not a priority. I have told her this. & now she’s pissed @ me. Maybe I am being unreasonable, but at what point do I advocate for my needs? Submitted May 25, 2019 at 02:20PM We’ve been married 8.5 years. For the last 2.5 years she’s been taking care of her dad & grandpa. They both have Alzheimer’s.As you can imagine, this has been a lot of work for her.During this time she’s checked out of our relationship. Special things she used t

Ok so married awhile like a little over 10 years. Have kids, house, the whole enchilada. Anyway, I take care of the house and kids while going to school the hubby works and provides. For the most part he handles all the outside of the house stuff. We are comfortable not rich but dont worry too much. Bow the problem, I rarely get laid. Like we finally did it like 2 weeks ago after at least a month. And while I was able to assist to get myself off it kind of sucked. It like a routine of I touch this he runs that and I hate it. Sometimes he rushes through that. Not much foreplay and really no kissing. He works a lot granted but has plenty of time for his hobby or makes the time. Yet sex falls to the wayside. We are still pretty young early 30s. I still get attention even with him with which makes him shitty. We ve been having problems with our sex life for about 6 years. Weight gain on my side was the issue on my side at first. Now I'm back to prebaby size and weight and looking pret

We just celebrated our 2nd year and I knew marriage wasn't all romance and tickle fights, that you get real close and intimate with another human bean and that can be weird.. sometimes shitty. But I did not at all expect to know what types of foods will give him what types of poops. How often he goes to the bathroom and what his schedule is. I even know how he wipes. Which is really aggressive and I feel bad for his butthole. Submitted May 25, 2019 at 03:33PM We just celebrated our 2nd year and I knew marriage wasn't all romance and tickle fights, that you get real close and intimate with another human bean and that can be weird.. sometimes shitty. But I did not at all expect to know what types of foods will give him what types of poops. How often he goes to the bathroom and what his schedule is.I even know how he wipes. Which is really aggressive and I feel bad for his butthole.

We've been married for 2 years, together for 5. We have a 3 month old son. Our son had colic for the first 2 months but is finally sleeping longer and rarely cries anymore, but can be fussy and demanding. My husband works 45 hours a week in 4 days and is often gone for 2-4 hours occassionally on weeknights and weekends taking lessons to further his career. I went back to work part time a month ago and will be going back full time in a week. I'm afraid that I won't be able to manage it all once I go back full time. The housework, caring for baby, and managing the nanny/daycare schedule when I'm at work. I've been solely getting up with our son at night, sometimes up to 5x a night, I'm exhausted and feel so alone in raising him. My husband will occassionally help change a diaper but I really have to beg or ask 3x before he "hears" me or gets up. He often ignores my requests or gets upset when I ask for help. He is tired, I'm tired. Whenever I te

I’ve been happily married for 16 years. He’s an amazing man: hard working, kind, loving, and supportive. But, he does some of the strangest things!! He always has three open containers of deodorant on the counter at one time. Most often, two of these containers are almost empty. He believes, if the dog licks his plate clean, that counts as pre-rinsing the dishes. No matter what I’m doing, he feels he must put my mail directly in my hands each day even though there’s a mail basket by the front door. Even though we have a closet full of towels, he insists on using the same set of towels. He packs three rolls of his favorite toilet paper for an overnight trip. We’re going away for a week in September. Does that mean he’ll fill his suitcase with 21 rolls or will we be making our first stop at the local Walmart? He’s had the same dried up, stretched out leather belt for 6 years. Instead of replacing it, he drills new holes in it as it continues to stretch out and lose its shape. He

Can anyone help me with an escape plan from my marriage? I can’t respect myself if I spend the rest of my life married to a woman who has been so disrespectful to me over so many years. Being that our kid is no longer a minor, would it still be considered abandonment if I move out? Submitted May 25, 2019 at 07:20PM Can anyone help me with an escape plan from my marriage? I can’t respect myself if I spend the rest of my life married to a woman who has been so disrespectful to me over so many years.Being that our kid is no longer a minor, would it still be considered abandonment if I move out?

I don't know what to do. I love my wife to bits but she has stopped showing me affection. We haven't had sex since January, she won't kiss me, she stopped telling me she loves me. She started sleeping in another room. I don't know why she is mad at me and she won't tell me. Last week she agreed to sleep in the same bed as me but said no sex. I'm trying to make her happy, I just feel like she doesn't like me anymore. Submitted May 25, 2019 at 07:37PM I don't know what to do. I love my wife to bits but she has stopped showing me affection. We haven't had sex since January, she won't kiss me, she stopped telling me she loves me. She started sleeping in another room. I don't know why she is mad at me and she won't tell me. Last week she agreed to sleep in the same bed as me but said no sex. I'm trying to make her happy, I just feel like she doesn't like me anymore.

My spouse and I don't fight often but we got into a doozy a couple days ago and I just can't shake it. They're out of town for the weekend and it had to do with me being upset they didn't want me to pick them up from the airport after a weekend of me missing them. Our marriage has been comfortable for a while with increasing love making (etc) after babies and all that. But now I'm feeling rejected, sad, and angry. It's stupid but also feels bigger than it should. I just need some encouragement that we'll get over this rough patch. Help? Submitted May 25, 2019 at 08:10PM My spouse and I don't fight often but we got into a doozy a couple days ago and I just can't shake it. They're out of town for the weekend and it had to do with me being upset they didn't want me to pick them up from the airport after a weekend of me missing them. Our marriage has been comfortable for a while with increasing love making (etc) after babies and all that.

Hi reddit, throwaway because my husband reads this sub. My husband's birthday is coming up. We've been together almost 8 years and he's seen me through a lot. Namely, I'm about 100 lbs heavier than when we met. Granted, I was anorexic when we met, so some extra weight is good, but after having our kid I just kept gaining. I'm staying home now and actually been slimming down some, but on to my issue. Due to certain financial constraints, I've decided the best course of action is to entertain a certain desire of his. Namely, he wants me to dress up. I have no issue with catering to his fantasies. But I'm a big girl. I'm afraid that if I get dressed up in the skimpy outfit I've picked, my size will just be highlighted. I guess I'm just wondering, how do I make myself feel sexy and confident enough to make his present worth it? I know this isn't the type of thing normally posted on here, but I really need some advice. Submitted May 25,

Sorry if bad english since it isnt my native language. Recently in my job my boss quit because he wanted to retire and the following two guys that should be promoted one quit and the other one got a better Job offer abroad , so i got promoted two steps up from my area , now i have a better income and salary than her ( Shes a Doctor and have a great Salary and Income. She always brag that with friends and family and make the joke i live off her). When i told her i expected she would be happy for me and us , but she was not . When my first paycheck come and i told her she told me i was being arrogant and started bitching about salary gaps between men and woman, she gets mad when i told friends and family about my promotion and that my economy is getting better . Shes starting to be more hours in the hospital and taking more shifts. I dont know why shes mad that i make more than her now and is really getting me worried because she seems stressed to take more shifts to make more money.

Ok so throw away for obvious reasons. Well here it is. We’re having issues. Wife told me that she’s no longer in love with me. She says that she had fallen out of love with me a long time ago. Now I’ve been struggling with trust issues. I’ve had problems in the past with my insecurities getting the better of me. Now I’m trying to keep them in check and not snoop on her phone. (She locks it now). I’m sure she does because we had a struggle with it one day because I wanted to see it. Bad choice on me. But any who I was told that she wants a divorce but is praying every day to change her heart because she wants to love me the way I love her. Now I’m confused how do you say one minute you want a divorce then the next minute you say you want me to stay. I’ve been told that im controlling and manipulative. But i don’t see it. I give her everything she wants. I don’t tell her that she can’t go out. I don’t tell her how to do anything. The manipulation I don’t see either. I don’t threaten or

Refer to subject. Submitted May 26, 2019 at 04:26AM Refer to subject.

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I recently found out my SO has a locked folder on his phone. We frequently watch porn together and he had it stored in the folder. The folder locked and when I asked him for the pin, he just unlocked it with his fingerprint instead of telling me. After we were finished, I asked him what the pin was again and he acted like he couldn't remember at the time and gave me what seemed like a bullshit pin. When I asked him why he didn't make it the same as his regular lock screen, he told me it wouldn't let him. We normally know the passwords to everything of the other persons, but I didn't even know he had a locked folder at all. Out of suspicions, I created myself a locked folder to see what it did since we have the exact same phones. I realized he lied about the pin not being able to be the same as your regular lock screen, because I made mine the same thing. In the folder it creates duplicates of your apps. Picture gallery, contacts, emails, everything. Am I wrong to hav

My wife and I have opposite work schedules. We have 2 kids and dont really get a lot of time together let alone intimate time together. Last couple times we had time alone we had a long day and she wasnt really very affectionate. More just annoyed and frustrated about kids and life in general. Tonight we were hanging out talking and griping about our day to day annoyances and then she asks, "so are we gonna do it?" It wasnt really a turn on. I told how i felt about that and she just got annoyed and left me and went to bed. I told her I feel like we havent been affectionate and that I really would like to feel like she was still attracted to me. I cant just fuck anything or anybody. After a long day I couldnt just flip it on. I know she wasnt upset about what I said she was just more upset that we just didnt do it. But that doesnt work for me. Sometimes i feel like you should just fuck her and get it over with but thats not me. I want us to enjoy be with each other and I want

I(M33) was approached by a recruiter for Tawkify and they set up a blind date for me next week. Does anyone have experience with this? EDIT: It’s a matchmaker service and this is in NYC Submitted May 25, 2019 at 07:10AM I(M33) was approached by a recruiter for Tawkify and they set up a blind date for me next week. Does anyone have experience with this?EDIT: It’s a matchmaker service and this is in NYC

Met on Tindr last week 35/m. We met up for dinner. He...did not look like his photos, which now I realized why he had a filter in half his photos. But since we've talked on the phone three times and texted a little in between I knew our personalities click. Dinner went fine, we made small talk, some jokes, learning about each other. He asks me if I'm nervous, I reply no, which was the truth. He replies he is. Sorta cute I guess. I dated really insecure people before and now I notice and stay away. I'm very confident most of the time and it's a huge turnoff. I was assuming we were splitting dinner but since it seemed like a bonafide date he immediately said he'd pay for it. I haven't had anyone pay for dinner or call me on the phone for years. I noticed a few red flags but I'm unable to verify them. Most glaring is something the first guy I dated did. Embellishing/lying about your achievements and successes. I know this stems from insecurity but it's l

Is anyone else finding that no matter how much work you do on your self-esteem, therapy etc you keep ending up dating the same person? I am bound to be attracted to emotionally unavailable men. Being a 33-year-old woman I have experience in noticing when a new relationship isn't working, so that's why I am bummed that I didn't nip it sooner. We had been seeing each other for almost four months and we would see each other once or twice a week, which was fine with me. The problem I should have seen was that when we saw each other it was almost always dinner-drinks-sex, but because I have things going on, I didn't see it as an issue at the time. Then we planned to do something together on one of the bank holiday weekends, and we saw each other for drinks on the Friday, but then that was it. I kept my damn weekend free but he ended up being too busy. I was so mad at myself. Anyway, I wont do a blow by blow of how the man I was seeing turned out to be an illusion, I'm

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Went out with a dude earlier today. Met him at a Meetup sessh about 2-3 wks back. He got my number and was nice and persistent in asking me out. Being single and all, I thought I'd give it a chance since peeps on OLD were 99% crappy and flaky. He was not my type at all; a little short and awkward, all that, while I'm bubbly, lively etc. Tbh conversation felt like pulling teeth and I felt really awkward. I can't believe that when a guy finally says at the end of a date that he wants to see me again and I don't want to -- what are the bloody odds. He texts me afterwards and asked if I want to go watch a movie, have dinner etc next time.. and I just said no. It's the fairest thing to do, instead of the usual ghosting. But it still felt bad. There you go.. my first time rejecting someone. Thanks for reading! Submitted May 25, 2019 at 09:07AM Went out with a dude earlier today. Met him at a Meetup sessh about 2-3 wks back. He got my number and was nice and pe

People in work were telling me i should go on a proper dating site, like one I pay for. In the past I have found match.com to be a bit meh because you never know who is paying for a subscription and can actually reply to you. What does everyone think? Has tinder/bumble superseded the need to pay for a dating website? Submitted May 25, 2019 at 09:51AM People in work were telling me i should go on a proper dating site, like one I pay for. In the past I have found match.com to be a bit meh because you never know who is paying for a subscription and can actually reply to you.What does everyone think? Has tinder/bumble superseded the need to pay for a dating website?

So with summer around the corner, I started feeling bored again and decided to give OLD another try. I made it clear that I am looking for an outdoorsy type to go on trips with or at least a running buddy. In the past I always went on adventures with my exes as I don’t have a family or close friends in the area. Not that I’m opposed to making new friends, it just doesn’t happen anymore and I’m tired of reaching out. I do go out by myself too but it’s nice to share new experiences with someone. Anyway, I keep getting likes and messages from people who don’t bother to read my profile. Or I’ll match with someone with similar interests but not one of them suggests going on a hike or a walk at least. Is this really too much to ask for? Do I come off as weird because I love nature and the outdoors or desperate because I’m actually willing to meet up to do stuff right away? Submitted May 25, 2019 at 11:32AM So with summer around the corner, I started feeling bored again and decided to

For the most part, I'm content to lean on my own counsel. However, I haven't really asked for a second set of eyes on my profiles in a very long time. So - this is that. Bumble profile Hinge profile I'd include my OKC profile text, but it's ridiculously lengthy and it's working as intended. However, for reference, here is the text of the previous version of that profile if you're so inclined. It's intentionally verbose. As well my photos, just like many folks, are a challenge. I try to show a variety of angles, but that often leads to the "you look different in person - better, but different than I expected." mass album of various photos I'm presently using on the different platforms Recently, I also had a couple of experiences where two different women said they expected me to be 'bigger' (context suggests they meant dad bod since we weren't getting naked (so save the jokes, thanks)). This, however, is what's under

I (33f) just had my latest 6 mo relationship end in spectacular fashion. My ex told me everything I wanted to hear, long term commitment, children, open communication, etc. Then I found out that he had stolen my credit cards and debit card information. At my mention that “someone” was stealing my money, he became a complete ghost, blocked all communication like I had never existed. The one before that was 8 years with someone I still think of as my best friend. After being engaged a year he decided he didn’t actually want to get married or have kids like we had often discussed. I’m finding it hard to move past this feeling that everyone will lie to me. I feel just defeated. I’m sure many have gone through similar upsets in their life plans. How do you stay optimistic? Is there a way to tell when he is lying to you and maybe himself about what he really wants? Submitted May 25, 2019 at 01:37PM I (33f) just had my latest 6 mo relationship end in spectacular fashion. My ex told m

Edit: Since you all can't read let's try this shit again: We met for dinner and drinks, and then had activities planned. I'd skipped out on lunch to sit with her for dinner. On the way, she suggested that we grab a coffee. Fair enough, fine. She proceeds to bitch about her job for two fucking hours straight. We miss dinner, I'm hungry and annoyed, and can't move her off-topic. We click on nothing, I feel no energy between us, no spark. I'm wasting my time, and my evening. I decided to do something about it, to get some of it back. I said "thanks for the time," and she responded: "Oh, is that it?" As if it was my fault for being unable to get her out of her chair for two hours despite suggesting a whole litany of activity replacement ideas. I suggest we go to the park and sit on a bench there- (at least it's more interesting than sitting in a Starbucks for two hours, you can see animals and enjoy the weather and sunset.) No dice. Poo

Gonna try online dating for the first time in over 5 years. Wish me luck. 😂 Submitted May 25, 2019 at 06:02PM Gonna try online dating for the first time in over 5 years. Wish me luck. 😂

I’ve just been through a break up after a 5 months relationship because we didn’t have the same expectations as far as long term plans and desires. Namely, he [48] wanted children, whereas I [39F] do not want any because I already have a pre-teen. I am bearing the entire responsibility for my child financially and in terms of education etc etc, although the main reason I accepted to have a child in the first place was because it was my ex-husband’s dream and main purpose in life. Then he decided it’s not what he wanted. So here I am, probably the worst type of demographic on the dating « market ». Woman of still childbearing age, full time job with super successful career, a child to care for, very little spare time. If I date men who don’t have children, they want children. Otherwise why bother dating a single mother ? Men who already have children are broke, too busy or too bitter. Men who don’t want a family don’t understand how little free time I have. I cannot be swayed by the

I’m it sure where to put this, I’ve been seeing someone for the last couple weeks or so and she’s absolutely amazing, we get along so well it’s almost crazy. Last night she told me her last partner gave her herpes. She was upset and was worried I would leave immediately and I felt so bad she had to go through this all. I assured her I’m not going anywhere and it didn’t change anything at all in my mind. I have absolutely no intention of leaving her but am just looking for some advice on how to handle it best. I tried googling but all I seemed to come up with were thought piece articles without any real information other than the generic be careful. Does anyone have any good resources for dating someone with herpes? I want to make sure I do this right and safe for both of us. Submitted May 25, 2019 at 06:41PM I’m it sure where to put this, I’ve been seeing someone for the last couple weeks or so and she’s absolutely amazing, we get along so well it’s almost crazy. Last night she

I've been dating a bunch over the past 3 years after ending a long term relationship. So far, there's always something not perfect after a couple dates. Women I click with VERY well, I am not physically attracted to them... or the sex is terrible. Women I find super hot and have amazing sex with, I find that we're not super compatible. Women I find attractive, have great sex with, have an amazing time with, they're not looking for anything serious. At what point do I just say screw it, forget physical attractiveness, or forget a compatible personality, and just pick one and settle in? Because this is getting kind of tiring... Submitted May 25, 2019 at 06:46PM I've been dating a bunch over the past 3 years after ending a long term relationship.So far, there's always something not perfect after a couple dates.Women I click with VERY well, I am not physically attracted to them... or the sex is terrible.Women I find super hot and have amazing sex with, I

Tldr: don't be shitty to people you date. I finally understand those who feel hurt after a few dates. Dating can suck sometimes After going through a rough break up of a living together 3 yr relationship, I was in a rough place. I felt very rejected from that break up as she called it off and moved out and I didn't want her too. Fast forward a bit, I've gone on first dates with like 5 diff people since, assuming I have nothing to lose and could use the practice. I didn't really expect to meet someone I liked because it just didn't seem like it would happen. To my amazement I did meet someone I liked. And we went out 3 times and finally made out at my house and things were going well. She would even tell me she liked me and was looking forward to hanging out. So I planned an abnormal date for the 4th time. She's in the middle of packing to move and I'm about to leave for a 1 month trip so we were trying to rush hanging out to get to know each other before I

What is up with guys putting pictures of themselves with kids and then pointing out "not my kid... niece/nephew... sister's kid..." WHY USE THAT PICTURE? I find it off-putting and attention-seeking. Like, do they think because someone let them near a child long enough to snap a photo that it means they're qualified potential dad material?! It really bugs me. I see it on a handful of profiles every day. I am actually interested in single dads so it particularly bothers me that I have to try and figure out if its really their child or not. One guy even edited his photo to write "niece" with an arrow. GUYS. PLEASE STOP THIS. (If women do this too, I imagine its equally unappealing). Submitted May 25, 2019 at 07:48PM What is up with guys putting pictures of themselves with kids and then pointing out "not my kid... niece/nephew... sister's kid..." WHY USE THAT PICTURE? I find it off-putting and attention-seeking. Like, do they think because s

I’ve been enjoying the single life for a few months now and, honestly, super afraid to be vulnerable again. Met this guy while we were both traveling through a CASUAL OLD app. We had a great time together, partied, talked, sex. Exchanged numbers but I was not expecting what was to follow: He starts trying to make plans to visit me. We live on opposite sides of the country. I felt a little pushed into it and ultimately figured that I might as well give it a shot. Who knows what could come of it? He just finished spending the week w me and my feelings on him have definitely swung to the side of friend zone. He’s told his parents about me, tried to arrange me to come fly out to him, even said that he’d consider moving if the relationship became serious. We had two serious talks while he was here that I flat out said “I’m not looking for a serious relationship, especially a LDR”, “I’m not emotionally available and I’m not ready to trust someone again”. I feel like such shit about it. L

So I went on my first date in a while tonight The guy seemed really nice over messages but didn't seem to understand what personal space was pawing at me alot trying to be affectionate maybe, and any time he asked me about me I answered then he would change the subject to something he did one time And he kept saying "oh so after this date Il get a message saying you don't want to be my girlfriend" or "you will ghost me" and he grabbed my face kissing me shoving his tongue in my mouth so I kind of stood there then when my message alert went off I pretended it was my grandma (babysitting) and had to go, got home and jumped in the shower feeling very over touched. I don't know what to do now as I'm not interested but as he's expecting it anyway do I just let him know? I don't want to lead anyone on I'm not like that at all. I just feel a bit crap knowing that I used a Saturday night on a crappy date when I could of been at home with my

I feel I've got myself trapped in a overthinking situation and I have no idea how to get out of this mind set. I've recently ended a (very stale) relationship with a guy I met online, who all though he was nice had as much passion as a potato. The next stage is to start dating again but I don't know where to start, if I respond to a guy looking for fun does it just mean sex?!? Then by responding am I agreeing to hook up just by the reaction of responding. I'm lost and lonely and don't want to keep wasting my time on guys who either see me as a mother figure or as a sex toy!! I genuinely don't know what to do :( any advice of how to get out of my own head would be greatly appreciated :) Submitted May 25, 2019 at 10:59PM I feel I've got myself trapped in a overthinking situation and I have no idea how to get out of this mind set. I've recently ended a (very stale) relationship with a guy I met online, who all though he was nice had as much passion a

Hey guys! My main purpose in this post is to share with you all a really good first date I had last week. I'm also going to ask for a bit of advice at the end, but really just wanted to share because I'm chilling at my apartment on a Saturday, am a bit bored, and haven't really told anybody about the date so I thought it would be fun. That, and some of the details of the date play into the question that I have. A woman (35F) sent me (33M) a message on OKCupid last Sunday, telling me that she really enjoyed my profile and my answers to the questions, saying that she appreciated how well thought out they were. I, of course, was freaking flattered. I checked out her profile in more detail, and we saw pretty much everything eye-to-eye. She seemed like she had a good head on her shoulders, and good intentions. We exchanged a couple of messages, and we seemed to be in similar places looking for similar things. She said she'd been independent for a several years and