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Showing posts from March 24, 2020

Reacting to a slow fade after 3 months

I was a fool, to let my guard down and the moment I did I felt absolutely gutted this was the way she chose to cut communication Meet this girl on an dating app at the start of the year, proceeds to only go for 3 great dates due to our busy schedule in the next 2.5 months. She also mentioned wanting to see me again over text 1-2 weeks after our last date. Things started to fade out when the virus hit and now I didn't replied to her last text since 1 week ago and she hasn't initiated any new plans either. I did ask her out 3 more other times before I stop replying completely In all honesty I should have seen this coming 1 month ago, when communication was starting to get slower and slower, she would reply text but always ended up giving excuses when planning for the next date, and found out recently I was actually blocked from viewing her stories on instagram, but she left me as a follower which took me way longer than it should to find out when I didn't see new stories f...

He’s (27M) being abrupt and says hurtful jokes to me(28F)

It’s silly things that he says to me like “you’re not the smartest are you” or “don’t send me stuff that aren’t funny”. He’s becoming a bit harsh and when I call him, he’s just sighing saying I woke him up from his nap. I’ve told him I’m a little hurt by the way he acts and he’s apologised and says he’s kidding when I say I’m going to leave him alone then.. Should I send him a message saying I’m going to leave him alone for a bit? Have sort of a break from him? Background: We were old friends 5 years ago but lost contact until recently and have dating for a few months now. Submitted March 25, 2020 at 12:14AM It’s silly things that he says to me like “you’re not the smartest are you” or “don’t send me stuff that aren’t funny”.He’s becoming a bit harsh and when I call him, he’s just sighing saying I woke him up from his nap. I’ve told him I’m a little hurt by the way he acts and he’s apologised and says he’s kidding when I say I’m going to leave him alone then..Should I send hi...

He wanted to surprise me at work today

The guy I’m dating told me he went shopping at my work to surprise me. Unfortunately today is my day off. I’m still happy about it though lol. Just knowing that he wanted to see me. We haven’t seen each for almost 2 weeks because of the Corona Virus. I did tell him to visit my work again later this week.! Submitted March 25, 2020 at 12:27AM The guy I’m dating told me he went shopping at my work to surprise me. Unfortunately today is my day off. I’m still happy about it though lol. Just knowing that he wanted to see me. We haven’t seen each for almost 2 weeks because of the Corona Virus. I did tell him to visit my work again later this week.!

/u/nihilistic_rabbit on Me Irl

Kanojo, Okarishimasu. Nice March 25, 2020 at 12:28AM

/u/rclaw180 on Am I asexual?

Yes, that's mostly true, I'm sorry if I'm too confusing, I'll be clear with you, the urges you're talking about don't happen to me where my body demands having actual sex with another person, but rather I just prefer jacking off. And, the fantasizing is just for people I feel connection with, and yes, so fantasizing sex with them is a kind of connection for me(emphasis on connection /emotion rather than sex) AND yes, cuddling /hugging /kissing can very well, and often times does satisfy that need for connection, I hope this makes it clear., so yes, the fantasizing is more about the person and emotionality rather than the physical part. March 25, 2020 at 12:26AM

/u/angiilngaallve on Am I asexual?

You're describing enjoyment/physical pleasure tho, I'm asking about attraction/having an urge or compulsion to experience sexual situations rather than just jacking off or something. Basically: -you jack off, and enjoy it (physically), and you feel an urge to -rarely do you fantasize about sex, but you enjoy the fantasy of having sex when you do (I can't tell whether you just enjoy it physically or enjoy the idea of being sexually involved with the person in the fantasy as well) -you don't enjoy sex, physically. But do you have a sexual urge to satisfy (kinda like how you feel an urge to jack off, but for actual sex) that cuddling couldn't, even if it doesn't feel good? March 25, 2020 at 12:18AM

/u/FragmentingDecay on Asexuals in relationships with non aces, how do you do it?

demi person here. for me it works because we just communicate a lot about things. generally, communication is key and if you end up with someone who likes you for who you are they either come to terms with you not feeling sexual attraction for them at all/only sometimes/not always the same amount/... and if you are in a stable and well-functioning relationship there'll be a way that works. that way might be an open/poly relationship, it could be one that involves sex but with the knowledge that sexual attraction is not there, it could be one completely without sex. so yeah, if someone wants to be with you for you they will either accept this and you'll most likely be able to figure out a solution together or they will not be able to accept it and in that case, well, dump them. it might hurt, it might even hurt a lot, but if they cannot accept you for who you are you are better off without them in the end. March 25, 2020 at 12:15AM

/u/paladruid on I feel like a therapist..

They probably perceive you as an unbiased outsider (edit: "outsider" in the sense of being someone not connected to their situation), because lacking those attractions, you can observe their situations in an objective way. Any kind of counseling, in my opinion, works best if the person counseling doesn't have too much bias into the situation. Besides! One can be aro/ace and have opinions and feelings on what a healthy relationship should look like. We all lack the attractions, not the concept of what's good or bad. March 25, 2020 at 12:12AM

/u/rclaw180 on Am I asexual?

I meant by saying that I did not enjoy all the sex I have had(with real people) and the only enjoyment I get is when I fantasize (not often) or masturbate(often) March 25, 2020 at 12:01AM

/u/angiilngaallve on Am I asexual?

just my imagination The plot thickens...so you've never seen someone IRL and felt that same desire for sexual fulfillment? Would you say you put yourself into the fantasies you have, or merely enjoy experiencing them from some kinda distance? Edit: aw shit did you mean that you occasionally feel the urge irl but only enjoy what you imagine it to be like rather than the reality? Edit 2: tho you also say that the urge can be fulfilled non-sexually, so I'm inclined to believe it's more about some other type of attraction rather than specifically sexual attraction._. March 24, 2020 at 11:59PM

/u/Sherry_A_H on I feel like a therapist..

I only have one friend who seems to be interested in dating at the moment, but we do talk about her dates and she asked me for ideas on what they could do on a lovely day. She knows I'm aro(flux) ace, but it's nice talking about stuff. I like helping people and though I have no clue what an actual date looks like, I do know what people tend to find enjoyable and how you can implement a nice atmosphere into a conversation. March 24, 2020 at 11:59PM

Is setralin bad

I met an online dude who takes setralin tablet and have hyper behaviour he told me he takes only sleeping tablets but I found out that he takes antidepressants do u think is it bad pill ? Submitted March 25, 2020 at 12:10AM I met an online dude who takes setralin tablet and have hyper behaviour he told me he takes only sleeping tablets but I found out that he takes antidepressants do u think is it bad pill ?

Things started out perfectly, however the epidemic put everything on hold, so did us. What's the best move in this scenario?

First and foremost I would like to point out that I am very aware of the fact that, a lot of people have so much bigger problems in this tragic situation, and have already sacrificed a lot more than a fling. I genuinely hope we can still talk about this, without me being selfish or disrespectful. Recently (in mid February) I (21M) have joined a college community group where I met a girl (19F). We saw each other once a week, when the group came together. However 3 weeks in, the group organized kind of a team building camp which lasted 2 days. We flirted there a lot, then on the 2nd day we were kissing, and holding hands. After the camp we kept contact on social media, two days later I was introduced to her friends, had a nightout, and eventually slept together (hadn't had a sex tho). Now, with the spread of corona virus, we have both decided to stay at home, and avoid hanging out with anyone just for fun. We try to reach out to eachother via Snapchat/Messenger, but I'm reall...

Do guys do this ?

I recently came to terms that something between a guy and I was really over. Ultimately though I think about him randomly. Anyways my question is do guys ever tend to reminisce about a girl? Even if things ended on bad note. And if so what ever really pushes them into trying to reconcile. Submitted March 24, 2020 at 11:27PM I recently came to terms that something between a guy and I was really over. Ultimately though I think about him randomly.Anyways my question is do guys ever tend to reminisce about a girl? Even if things ended on bad note. And if so what ever really pushes them into trying to reconcile.

Am I allowed to ask out a karate teacher?

My understanding thus far is that asking out one's teacher is taboo and/or inappropriate. I'm interested in my karate teacher. I'm a student at the dojo, but since it's not actually school or university, maybe it's less taboo? There is also an age difference though. I'm polyamorous, have a partner 12 years older, and this teacher is 22 years older. I wouldn't actually know how to ask him out or if I even would. But in theory, am I "allowed" to? Submitted March 24, 2020 at 11:27PM My understanding thus far is that asking out one's teacher is taboo and/or inappropriate. I'm interested in my karate teacher. I'm a student at the dojo, but since it's not actually school or university, maybe it's less taboo? There is also an age difference though. I'm polyamorous, have a partner 12 years older, and this teacher is 22 years older.I wouldn't actually know how to ask him out or if I even would. But in theory, am I "a...

Men have an upper hand when it comes to dating and relationships

As much as the majority male and some women will disagree; dating and relationship is as archaic as it sounds is a patriarchal game. (I am going to ignore temporarily the whole women can ask out and they should pursue a man too, for the sake of this argument) Because when a man decides if it's a serious relationship, when he chases and when pursues a woman it's a completely different story when he suddenly says he wants casual/FWB/not looking for relationship. They call the shots; the women give them a chance if they are fairly decent. To the men who don't agree, you are not taking enough risk and putting yourself out there and getting rejected. As a woman it's all the more tough!!! Submitted March 24, 2020 at 11:30PM As much as the majority male and some women will disagree; dating and relationship is as archaic as it sounds is a patriarchal game. (I am going to ignore temporarily the whole women can ask out and they should pursue a man too, for the sake of th...

Would you choose compatibility or chemistry?

Known him for 5 months, dated for 4, officially asked me to be his gf more than a month ago. He treated me very well, definitely a lot better than anyone in the past. Puts in effort and cares a lot about me. Realized by second month of knowing I feel like I was losing feelings. Told him I needed a break to figure things out, made him questioned a lot of things when that happened. We haven’t seen each other for a month due to the break and now quarantine. Talked about it over text and decided we’ll try. Logic side: he’s a great guy, we are compatible in most ways. Never argued (yet). He have done a lot for me and is a great partner Emotional side: no physical attraction (he doesn’t try/put effort into looking good-which is 90% of the time), faded chemistry? (It was there first month of knowing) now zero, no butterflies, no connection (irl/texting, texting feels like a chore) Verdict: I am 25F, looking for LTR and someone to grow and or settle with. Should I continue dating? We have ...

Would you?

If someone goes to college and also interns at a place and doesn’t get on social media much, can you be upset at them if they don’t reply as quickly? But this person doesn’t open your messages and leave you on read which is a really good thing. Submitted March 24, 2020 at 11:37PM If someone goes to college and also interns at a place and doesn’t get on social media much, can you be upset at them if they don’t reply as quickly? But this person doesn’t open your messages and leave you on read which is a really good thing.

I NEED HELP

i have a question so me and this girl went to the same school and she was a grade higher than me and i seen her and she seen me but never talked i only seen her in between classes then she graduated and i followed her on insta both her main and spam and followed me back on both so that was that but a couple weeks ago me and my buddy were talking and i brung her name up and he said he knew her and text her about me (i would of done it but at the time when i had followed her i never had the courage like i do now)and that night she followed me on snap after that we were text back and forth late at night like at 2 in the morning and it was great and she would take like 20 min some times that max was like 25 or she will respond fast but then i ask her out and she told me yes she will like that and we bother exchange numbers then i moved from snap to texting her on her phone number and we were text like we did on snap then since the corona is out and we had to postpone the date i wanted to ...

Do people want a relationship second year of college?

This is a genuine question out of curiosity, but are people looking for more serious things second year of college? Freshman year is known for hook ups and experimenting, but does that mentality change second year? Or are flings still the most common sophomore year? Submitted March 24, 2020 at 11:40PM This is a genuine question out of curiosity, but are people looking for more serious things second year of college? Freshman year is known for hook ups and experimenting, but does that mentality change second year? Or are flings still the most common sophomore year?

My best friend who I like has now become single

So recently my best friend who I’m interested in has broken up with his gf. However he has told me that he’s kinda interested in someone atm... but I feel like the reason he isn’t considering me in a romantic way is because I have never showed him my true feelings(?) Do you guys think it’s worth shooting my shot? And if so how should I approach the situation? Submitted March 24, 2020 at 11:41PM So recently my best friend who I’m interested in has broken up with his gf. However he has told me that he’s kinda interested in someone atm... but I feel like the reason he isn’t considering me in a romantic way is because I have never showed him my true feelings(?) Do you guys think it’s worth shooting my shot? And if so how should I approach the situation?

(21F) thinking about telling (22M)boyfriend about a past experience...?

I'm trying to decide whether or not to tell my boyfriend that I was molested as a child... some things have happened between us (during sex) because of my past and I want him to know it's not because of him. I apologized to him for.. basically freaking out.. and told him something along the lines of 'there are things I want to tell you but I can't right now'... because I really couldn't.. I can't talk about it. I don't know what to do. I've never told anyone, not ever. I don't want him to be disgusted with me. I don't want him to feel bad for me. I just have no idea how he will react, I've never discussed this with anyone Any advice is appreciated ~ Comments and/or insight are welcome, I'll take anything at this point Submitted March 24, 2020 at 11:43PM I'm trying to decide whether or not to tell my boyfriend that I was molested as a child... some things have happened between us (during sex) because of my past and I want ...

Why would he squeeze my hand during a romantic conversation instead of respond verbally?

We (29F) (39M) met at work and have been flirting for months but he’s my boss so we haven’t moved anything past flirting. Then there was a work event and sparks were flying. We kept catching each other’s eyes from across the room and it kept getting more and more intense each time. We were like magnets for each other. At some point during the night he says to me, “I know this is hard”. I respond, “Yeah it’s hard. I like you!” He says, “I like you too....are you a player?” “No, I just feel chemistry with you”. He sat there for a few seconds, not responding. I could tell he was thinking about what I said. Instead of saying something, he reached over and grabbed my hand, held it for a few seconds, and squeezed it. Then looked into my eyes and told me he wanted to kiss me. I feel like if he were just too afraid to say anything he wouldn’t have said he wanted to kiss me and he wouldn’t be able to look at me like that. If I could ask him I would, but we’re trying to stay away from each ot...