/u/SaveMySelfHarmWife on Is me being ace the reason I can’t fathom why people cheat?
ABSOLUTELY! But it is complicated. I'm reciprosexual (I can have sex, but only when my partner shows sexual attraction first) . While I could never cheat, I understand the urges people feel, since I temporarily stop being asexual just when my wife shows sexual attraction toward me. A huge factor that people don't address is that we don't separate "sexuality" from a "non-sexual intimate physical relationship". Apples and oranges, yet we group them together! In my case, being reciprosexual limits my sexuality, but I always feel a need for cuddling and such, the non-sexual parts of the physical relationship. Many people who cheat aren't looking for sex. They might have it, enjoying the "dopamine rush", but that wasn't the point. They're looking for the intimacy that has faded away (or never existed) in their relationship, or "validation". In many cases, sex doesn't even happen, but they are intimate in other ways (i...