I am watching am older anime called Shiro Bakko right now (white box) and there isn't any romance in sight. It's just a bunch of young women trying to follow their passion and make Anime. If you like slice of life Anime I highly recommend it. July 30, 2021 at 12:01AM

That's not forced romance, that's the "women as reward" trope. July 29, 2021 at 11:59PM

I am exactly the same way. Incest revulsion is triggered for me by people who grew up as siblings and went through puberty together. It results in some weird opinions.. For example I am comfortable with the idea of Captain Jack Harkness meeting himself or the relationship in the Loki TV series (though I was hoping it was just platonic or romantic). BUT the idea of Iris and Barry in CWs The Flash makes me want to throw up in my mouth. It's worse because Detective West who raised Barry from 10 and is a great father to Barry also ships that.🤢 July 29, 2021 at 11:54PM

By "trying out" the label you mean embracing it as a way of defining myself while I figure everything out? I guess it makes sense. But I just kind of feel my orientation and my "position" on the ace spectrum too vague yet to take on one label or the other. Maybe just "asexual" feels vague enough for me if I think about it in that sense. At least for now. July 29, 2021 at 11:52PM

It really depends. I think that romance for younger people is fine since younger often people do feel romance and in fact during adolescent it's a big deal and learning to navigate romantic and sexual relationships is a large part of growing up for a large number of people. I do think that there is an over focus on romance based on the percentage of stories where it is the sole focus vs the percentage of stories that don't focus or include it at all. I think you only need to be worried about liking youth romance if you are an adult that finds it romantically or sexually titillating rather than sweet, nice, relatable, or neutral. Also maybe if consuming it turns you into the "nosey aunt" of the young people in your actual life (aka obsession with pairing off people, specifically young people). July 29, 2021 at 11:47PM

I would also recommend Hilda. It gave a similar vibe. I would disagree with the the Aang and Katara relationship being detrimental to the plot I thought it was fine not super interesting but it's a decent representation of a young relationship. Both characters make mistakes and there are some tropes which are flimsy premises for plot. My main problem with it is that I hate the "main protagonist finds true love" trope, especially if it's their first love. Most people don't marry their first crush. July 29, 2021 at 11:46PM

City of ember while not an animation is a boy/girl adventure without romance July 29, 2021 at 11:43PM

I’m a fan of Ducktales 2017, and one of my fave things is that there is no romance between the kids! There are some romantic relationships among the adults, but they’re not important. Friendship and family are much more important to the central theme and plot. July 29, 2021 at 11:40PM

I caught myself doing that and stopped before it got too bad. For me it was like "I like both these kids and think they will grow to be wonderful people. I also like their families. It would be convenient if when they grew up and got married it could be to each other and I wouldn't have to worry about them making poor partner choices or meeting unfortunately awful in laws. Heck even getting to know a decent other family is a lot of work." July 29, 2021 at 11:39PM

Good advice other Hannah! July 29, 2021 at 11:37PM

Hey, not a problem! It's elating to know you're not alone, especially after awhile of feeling like you're strange in a way that others can't quite relate to (at least, that's how it was for me.) Finding community can be really validating. Joining this sub has actually helped me discover more about myself. I doubted my sexuality for a long time because of my interest in kink, before learning that the two aren't mutually exclusive at all. Finally shucking that 'imposter-syndrome' feeling does wonders for one's self confidence. I'm not sure how new you are to this sub, but welcome! This is a great sub for asking questions, so don't be afraid to make a post if you've got any. July 29, 2021 at 11:37PM

It may change, it may not. I thought I was pansexual at that age, turns out I'm panromantic asexual actually. That doesn't mean you will change your mind though, it just means that things can change. That doesn't make you any less asexual now. You've found a label that makes you feel right, and that's what's important. If I had been told "oh, you'll grow out of that" when I was identifying as pan, I would have been pissed! The unfortunate thing is, many people will try to invalidate your identity at any age. 20s and younger, youre just a late bloomer. 30s - 40s, you just haven't found the right person yet. 50s and up, theyll just say there's something mentally wrong with you. There's no winning with those types of people. So just live your life as you are now. You may change your identity as you grow, or you may realize you were right from the beginning. Whatever happens, you are valid in who you are. July 29, 2021 at 11:37PM

ah thank you! July 29, 2021 at 11:36PM

Well that's gross and awful. July 29, 2021 at 11:35PM

ah thank you! i’m hoping to study theology at university next year, do you have any advice? July 29, 2021 at 11:35PM

aghh im so sorry you had to go through that ‘you have to’ phase but i’m so happy for you about your living situation now! (totally not jealous haha) July 29, 2021 at 11:34PM

Generally when I see this, I like to think it is show runners trying to tell kids that age that all their attempts at mimicking of adult relationships is okay. Kids who are 4 will mimick having a relationship quite often even if all they watched was sesame Street which is pretty much a no romance zone despite having established couples. Mostly kids struggle declare "this person is my partner" and really just proceed to be exclusive friends but call each other by special names and go on fake dates. Its a lot like playing house really. Certainly there are probably some kids who get romantic crushes at 4 but mostly, in my experience it is just role play. July 29, 2021 at 11:34PM

The best way to describe it is when you have a craving for food (lets go with chocolate). Only with sexual attraction your "craving" is to engage in sexual activity with someone. Personally, I don't really care about chocolate but if someone gives me something, when I eat it I can enjoy it (that's being sex favorable). It's usually never something I have a craving for, except rarely.... rarely I can't think about anything but eating some chocolate. Like, I'm going to go to the store right now and load up on some because I need it. That's being grey. The baseline is feeling nothing but with specific circumstances (or a random breeze) it can turn into a craving. At least, that's how I experience sexual attraction (obviously not the same for everyone). This is going to be intentionally crude, but basically there will be a guy who catches my eye and I can't stop thinking about sitting on his dick. It's crude because that's what my brain...

haha that’s so true! i love what you said about the atmosphere being one where you are encouraged to turn down sex but now that’s not what they want...oh please don’t apologise for the response i really appreciate it, it’s exactly what i was curious about July 29, 2021 at 11:31PM

Yeah i was 16 when it started and it ended 10 months ago. I relate so much. I just worry that he might coerce someone else to have sex with him too. I dont want anyone to feel like that. It's weird I'm only looking to date people on the ace spectrum now. I'm usung the experience to identify red flags in other people and relstionships July 29, 2021 at 11:27PM

I’ve edited it for the most part July 29, 2021 at 11:25PM

For your own safety (since internet creeps are everywhere), NEVER put your real age and gender on the internet. Never share personal info--even innocuous information like a single age or gender is a no-go. I know plenty of people do it, but don't be them. July 29, 2021 at 11:24PM

Thanks for all the help. I really didn’t expect so many responses. 🥰💜💜💜 July 29, 2021 at 11:24PM