BF(22M) bailed on plans with me(24F) cuz of miscommunication

Bf and I are from different countries, so sometimes we struggle being clear. I've been sick the past week, and he asked me my weekend plans. I said I'm drinking with friends on Friday and he's invited too, and I have no plans after. He said let's meet on Sunday, and said he'll probs join us Friday too. We had issues in the past where I always included friends at our dates, so I make sure to plan alone time with him now. Meanwhile some old friends asked if I wanna drive up and meet them on Sunday, and I said no cuz I already promised my bf.

On Friday, my friends decided to move plans to Saturday or Sunday, so I told my bf exactly that. He says he already cancelled his other plans for us, and asks if I still wanna hang. I was still sick, so I apologized and told him I should probably rest up. On Saturday, he says he's bored and asks if I wanna hang. I'm still kinda sick and tell him I'm gonna hibernate one more day so that I can go out with him on Sunday. He says he made other plans cuz I told him I'm going drinking with my friends on Sunday. I tell him I wasn't planning on cancelling our date for that, we could join them only if we wanted at night. He says that makes sense, but says how was he supposed to know that. Now I'm kinda confused cuz:

  1. i said they're drinking maybe sat OR sun
  2. even if he thought i will meet them Sunday night, why does that rule out the entire day?

I tried to explain these to him, and mentioned drinking isn't happening anyway. He just replies with "okay. don't worry about it cuz you're sick. I'm alright". And proceeds to post an instagram story of him clubbing.

His reply makes me feel it was all my fault, like he was supposed to be mad or something, and shitty cuz i was trying to stop being sick all week for our date. Am i overreacting?

tl;dr: BF said let's meet Sunday. Later told me he made other plans cuz he thought I'm flaking, and sounds like he should be the one getting mad.



Submitted May 26, 2019 at 06:48AM

Bf and I are from different countries, so sometimes we struggle being clear. I've been sick the past week, and he asked me my weekend plans. I said I'm drinking with friends on Friday and he's invited too, and I have no plans after. He said let's meet on Sunday, and said he'll probs join us Friday too. We had issues in the past where I always included friends at our dates, so I make sure to plan alone time with him now. Meanwhile some old friends asked if I wanna drive up and meet them on Sunday, and I said no cuz I already promised my bf.​On Friday, my friends decided to move plans to Saturday or Sunday, so I told my bf exactly that. He says he already cancelled his other plans for us, and asks if I still wanna hang. I was still sick, so I apologized and told him I should probably rest up. On Saturday, he says he's bored and asks if I wanna hang. I'm still kinda sick and tell him I'm gonna hibernate one more day so that I can go out with him on Sunday. He says he made other plans cuz I told him I'm going drinking with my friends on Sunday. I tell him I wasn't planning on cancelling our date for that, we could join them only if we wanted at night. He says that makes sense, but says how was he supposed to know that. Now I'm kinda confused cuz:​i said they're drinking maybe sat OR suneven if he thought i will meet them Sunday night, why does that rule out the entire day?​I tried to explain these to him, and mentioned drinking isn't happening anyway. He just replies with "okay. don't worry about it cuz you're sick. I'm alright". And proceeds to post an instagram story of him clubbing.​His reply makes me feel it was all my fault, like he was supposed to be mad or something, and shitty cuz i was trying to stop being sick all week for our date. Am i overreacting?​tl;dr: BF said let's meet Sunday. Later told me he made other plans cuz he thought I'm flaking, and sounds like he should be the one getting mad.

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