My parents are controlling me more than my younger sibling

Writing while crying... sorry for the word vomit.

I’m a 19 year old girl, I’ve always been smart, sensible and responsible, especially when compared to my other siblings. My older sister got pregnant at a young and and still lives at home to avoid having to pay bills, but she’s almost 25... And my younger sister who’s 17 is a drunk who loves to party and stays out until 5 am during the weekends.

I’m the smart sister, the kind one. I’m the only one who ever helps my mom cook or clean, and gives up hanging out with friends to always take care of my nephew, they need a lot of help with a babysitter and I guess I’ve just become that. As well as I never give my parents any trouble or attitude.

I met a guy online, and I’ve known him to 2+ years now. He’s older than me, and lives in a different country. We decided we should finally meet this summer, and I’d really love to go to his country and stay in his home being that if he came here, we’d have to factor in hotel $$ and things like that. I have even saved up the perfect amount of money and have been planning this out for 6+ months.

Anyways, I asked my parents (not told, but asked because I thought that’d be more respectful) if I can fly out there. They’ve never yelled at me more in my life than after telling them this. They think he’s a killer, a predator, a man who’s going to harvest my organs.

Before you guys attack me on this, know that this man has been here for me throughout all my lowest points and has never failed to make me happy. He helps me grow confident about who I am, what I look like, he helped me realize my dreams / career plan, he helped me apply for my first job, he makes sure I never feel lonely, and just overall makes me feel loved.

I would really love to go meet him, but it seems impossible with my parents controlling me. My mom, the day after I told her, took away and hid my passport...

Tonight, it just got to an all time low. My mom, older sister, and nephew went away for the weekend. My younger sister decided to have a full blown party at the house, and my parents let her. My younger sister always gets to do whatever she wants. She’s graduating this June and SHE’S TRAVELING TO ANOTHER COUNTRY ALMOST THE SAME DISTANCE AWAY. I will admit, it is a school trip, but it is a country where she’d be allowed to legally drink and party. I know she’s going to do all of that. After letting my emotions get the best of me, I texted my mom angrily, telling her that since my sister gets to do whatever she wants, I should too and that I’m flying no matter what they say. Well, my mom just told my dad to talk to me and he angrily came and yelled at me. My dad has never, in my life, done that. The angry expression and force he had to make me show him a picture of the man I want to meet and to explain to him why I want to do this, despite telling him to go away (he has hardly ever been a part of my life, or has ever been there for me, I don’t know why all of a sudden he gets to have a say about what I do with my own life) And this was all the while my sister is in the house with all these people, blasting music and drinking and shit.

I feel confused, and sad, and incredibly mad. I don’t even know what to do, I’m just in my room while my sister is partying and living her best life, yet I’m being controlled like this.

I know it is scary for my parents to let me do anything like this , but I just wish they would grant me the same freedom my YOUNGER sister has. At this point, I just want to cut out my family from my life as soon as I have the chance. And they’re making me want to even cut him out of my life because it’s just too complex, that’s unfair to him.

What can I do? What should I do? Any HELPFUL suggestions and/or criticisms please.

Tl;dr my parents won’t let me travel outside of the country, yet my little sister is allowed to do that exact same thing .

Submitted May 26, 2019 at 06:46AM

Writing while crying... sorry for the word vomit.I’m a 19 year old girl, I’ve always been smart, sensible and responsible, especially when compared to my other siblings. My older sister got pregnant at a young and and still lives at home to avoid having to pay bills, but she’s almost 25... And my younger sister who’s 17 is a drunk who loves to party and stays out until 5 am during the weekends.I’m the smart sister, the kind one. I’m the only one who ever helps my mom cook or clean, and gives up hanging out with friends to always take care of my nephew, they need a lot of help with a babysitter and I guess I’ve just become that. As well as I never give my parents any trouble or attitude.I met a guy online, and I’ve known him to 2+ years now. He’s older than me, and lives in a different country. We decided we should finally meet this summer, and I’d really love to go to his country and stay in his home being that if he came here, we’d have to factor in hotel $$ and things like that. I have even saved up the perfect amount of money and have been planning this out for 6+ months.Anyways, I asked my parents (not told, but asked because I thought that’d be more respectful) if I can fly out there. They’ve never yelled at me more in my life than after telling them this. They think he’s a killer, a predator, a man who’s going to harvest my organs.Before you guys attack me on this, know that this man has been here for me throughout all my lowest points and has never failed to make me happy. He helps me grow confident about who I am, what I look like, he helped me realize my dreams / career plan, he helped me apply for my first job, he makes sure I never feel lonely, and just overall makes me feel loved.I would really love to go meet him, but it seems impossible with my parents controlling me. My mom, the day after I told her, took away and hid my passport...Tonight, it just got to an all time low. My mom, older sister, and nephew went away for the weekend. My younger sister decided to have a full blown party at the house, and my parents let her. My younger sister always gets to do whatever she wants. She’s graduating this June and SHE’S TRAVELING TO ANOTHER COUNTRY ALMOST THE SAME DISTANCE AWAY. I will admit, it is a school trip, but it is a country where she’d be allowed to legally drink and party. I know she’s going to do all of that. After letting my emotions get the best of me, I texted my mom angrily, telling her that since my sister gets to do whatever she wants, I should too and that I’m flying no matter what they say. Well, my mom just told my dad to talk to me and he angrily came and yelled at me. My dad has never, in my life, done that. The angry expression and force he had to make me show him a picture of the man I want to meet and to explain to him why I want to do this, despite telling him to go away (he has hardly ever been a part of my life, or has ever been there for me, I don’t know why all of a sudden he gets to have a say about what I do with my own life) And this was all the while my sister is in the house with all these people, blasting music and drinking and shit.I feel confused, and sad, and incredibly mad. I don’t even know what to do, I’m just in my room while my sister is partying and living her best life, yet I’m being controlled like this.I know it is scary for my parents to let me do anything like this , but I just wish they would grant me the same freedom my YOUNGER sister has. At this point, I just want to cut out my family from my life as soon as I have the chance. And they’re making me want to even cut him out of my life because it’s just too complex, that’s unfair to him.What can I do? What should I do? Any HELPFUL suggestions and/or criticisms please.Tl;dr my parents won’t let me travel outside of the country, yet my little sister is allowed to do that exact same thing .