I keep on going back and forth into hookup culture help!!!

So I was absitent for 7 months than somehow I always end up convincing myself hookup culture is okay and that I can have a sneaky link or friends with bens. That in my head I can say we're together even if we're actually not cause we're messing with each other and that it could last years and it will be like I'm in a relationship or well it could lead to something serious. So I had sex again for the first time and it's been hard on me more emotions this time and knowing I'm gonna get feelings very badly I always end up getting hurt. Before this I was in hookup culture for about 6/2 years I wanted out than just like I want out now but my brain always convinces me I can just do it one last time I'm not happy when I'm in it but sex makes me feel loved and I get validated in big ways. How can I stop for good I can't feel real emotions now and sleeping with someone first night ever meeting them is no big deal to me now. When it really should be and like let's say I was in a commuter relationship and he left me I wouldn't feel anything wouldn't cry just like okay on to the next bye . I think this is a side effect of hookup culture not being able to feel emotions if the love of my life leaves me I should feel something about it. Anyway it's so hard cause dating now is pretty much just hooking up sneaky link situationship. I don't want it no more I don't like the fact the person I'm hooking up with can just leave anytime they want no strings attached it's too much that's the part that bothers me the most I want real commitment can anyone relate help thank you!!!



Submitted July 27, 2022 at 12:16AM

So I was absitent for 7 months than somehow I always end up convincing myself hookup culture is okay and that I can have a sneaky link or friends with bens. That in my head I can say we're together even if we're actually not cause we're messing with each other and that it could last years and it will be like I'm in a relationship or well it could lead to something serious. So I had sex again for the first time and it's been hard on me more emotions this time and knowing I'm gonna get feelings very badly I always end up getting hurt. Before this I was in hookup culture for about 6/2 years I wanted out than just like I want out now but my brain always convinces me I can just do it one last time I'm not happy when I'm in it but sex makes me feel loved and I get validated in big ways. How can I stop for good I can't feel real emotions now and sleeping with someone first night ever meeting them is no big deal to me now. When it really should be and like let's say I was in a commuter relationship and he left me I wouldn't feel anything wouldn't cry just like okay on to the next bye . I think this is a side effect of hookup culture not being able to feel emotions if the love of my life leaves me I should feel something about it. Anyway it's so hard cause dating now is pretty much just hooking up sneaky link situationship. I don't want it no more I don't like the fact the person I'm hooking up with can just leave anytime they want no strings attached it's too much that's the part that bothers me the most I want real commitment can anyone relate help thank you!!!

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