He is sick! should i ignore him moving forward?

Few days back i (32 year old black female) wrote i think 3 posts here on reddit which i later deleted coz i stumbled on new info. Anyway these posts were about this hot erratic man (30 year old white male) who i met a few months back and who was constantly disappearing on me and flat out told me that i am not his type only for him to re-surface and flirt with me (even show signs of jealousy when i went on a date with a different guy. A 35 year old white male)

It was hard for me to understand him or what he wanted especially because i had expressed my interest and at some point i even felt that maybe he could just be some racist asshole or maybe he has a wife or something. Something felt wrong!

We stuck to just having fun (NO SEX!) Just weed and drinking. Going out dancing, eating etc. (Which were all my treats coz he has no money) But there was always this distance he kept and my gut always picked a weird vibe from him.

Anyway long story short: 1.Clothed him at some point 2.Offered to house him (he declined. He did not move in and did not tell me where he sleeps/lives) 3.Gave him money as he is still looking for work (frankly i don't expect to get paid. I can already tell he is the type to not pay so just gave him what i can afford to lose) 4.Was his confidant for months

Little did i know that these small seemingly unimportant things to me (I mean i would do it for anyone) would create a connection to him.

Started getting really worried sick to my stomach everytime it rained outside wondering where he was sleeping or if he has a sweater on. Started feeling guilty when i ate coz i wondered if he had eaten knowing he's been trying to find work etc. And everytime he did his disappearing thing i just got anxiety!!!

So now it's clear- I LOVE HIM!

All his lies, not showing up, not being responsible, heavy drinking, too much weed- all this shit, i have found out (earlier mentioned info above) is due to MENTAL ILLNESS.

Someone told me his story with the psych ward. I wasn't snooping around.......okay fine i was 🙄 And i found out he is very sick and has a lot of trauma. He has maniac episodes but doesn't get violent only really hype and they are usually followed by a deep depression.

He had mentioned to me that his mom tortured him as a kid so me going to check his mental health was sparked by what he told me.

Now my question is, what should i do? Do you still pursue a sick person? And if i ignore him coz of it, doesn't that make me a horrible bitch who runs away coz someone is unwell? (Sincere answers would be appreciated)



Submitted July 26, 2022 at 12:15AM

Few days back i (32 year old black female) wrote i think 3 posts here on reddit which i later deleted coz i stumbled on new info. Anyway these posts were about this hot erratic man (30 year old white male) who i met a few months back and who was constantly disappearing on me and flat out told me that i am not his type only for him to re-surface and flirt with me (even show signs of jealousy when i went on a date with a different guy. A 35 year old white male)It was hard for me to understand him or what he wanted especially because i had expressed my interest and at some point i even felt that maybe he could just be some racist asshole or maybe he has a wife or something. Something felt wrong!We stuck to just having fun (NO SEX!) Just weed and drinking. Going out dancing, eating etc. (Which were all my treats coz he has no money) But there was always this distance he kept and my gut always picked a weird vibe from him.Anyway long story short: 1.Clothed him at some point 2.Offered to house him (he declined. He did not move in and did not tell me where he sleeps/lives) 3.Gave him money as he is still looking for work (frankly i don't expect to get paid. I can already tell he is the type to not pay so just gave him what i can afford to lose) 4.Was his confidant for monthsLittle did i know that these small seemingly unimportant things to me (I mean i would do it for anyone) would create a connection to him.Started getting really worried sick to my stomach everytime it rained outside wondering where he was sleeping or if he has a sweater on. Started feeling guilty when i ate coz i wondered if he had eaten knowing he's been trying to find work etc. And everytime he did his disappearing thing i just got anxiety!!!So now it's clear- I LOVE HIM!All his lies, not showing up, not being responsible, heavy drinking, too much weed- all this shit, i have found out (earlier mentioned info above) is due to MENTAL ILLNESS.Someone told me his story with the psych ward. I wasn't snooping around.......okay fine i was 🙄 And i found out he is very sick and has a lot of trauma. He has maniac episodes but doesn't get violent only really hype and they are usually followed by a deep depression.He had mentioned to me that his mom tortured him as a kid so me going to check his mental health was sparked by what he told me.Now my question is, what should i do? Do you still pursue a sick person? And if i ignore him coz of it, doesn't that make me a horrible bitch who runs away coz someone is unwell? (Sincere answers would be appreciated)
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