I[23F] need more attention than my boyfriend does[23M]

Well, the title can preface everything... I'm quite a needy person although I don't consider myself as clingy. I like some conversations during the day and going out at least once a week.

My boyfriend have been together for almost 7 months and in general things were great. I have some problems with anxiety and depression that are being treated with meds and therapy, but those problems(and testing medication) don't really help.

So, the problem is, I feel frustrated because I end up seeing myself in a bad light every time I ask for attention... For exemple: He studies full time, I work and study, so usually he has more free time. But suddenly he wanted to cancel our plans on the weekend (only one day) because he needs to read some texts for uni. Mind you that we don't text much either because he's busy reading as well... While I work 8 hours a day and have uni at night, have my final project and 2 essays to deliver on the next week, but I'm managing to make time for everything...

I just feel frustrated because it seems that I'm the only one making an effort... And I feel guilty for wanting this attention because my anxiety already made a huge impact on our relationship and I don't want to strain it even more... Am I being unreasonable? Am I asking too much? Or is this just a difference between the two of us that we can try to overcome(or not)? I'm kind of lost...

Before anyone says anything, I do have friends outside of him that I talk and occasionally hang out. I don't have much time for my hobbies but I do try to manage everything... I just think his attention is different and I crave it more...

Tl;dr: I need more attention than bf, am I being unreasonable? Is it my anxiety striking again?



Submitted April 05, 2019 at 08:59PM

Well, the title can preface everything... I'm quite a needy person although I don't consider myself as clingy. I like some conversations during the day and going out at least once a week.My boyfriend have been together for almost 7 months and in general things were great. I have some problems with anxiety and depression that are being treated with meds and therapy, but those problems(and testing medication) don't really help.So, the problem is, I feel frustrated because I end up seeing myself in a bad light every time I ask for attention... For exemple: He studies full time, I work and study, so usually he has more free time. But suddenly he wanted to cancel our plans on the weekend (only one day) because he needs to read some texts for uni. Mind you that we don't text much either because he's busy reading as well... While I work 8 hours a day and have uni at night, have my final project and 2 essays to deliver on the next week, but I'm managing to make time for everything...I just feel frustrated because it seems that I'm the only one making an effort... And I feel guilty for wanting this attention because my anxiety already made a huge impact on our relationship and I don't want to strain it even more... Am I being unreasonable? Am I asking too much? Or is this just a difference between the two of us that we can try to overcome(or not)? I'm kind of lost...Before anyone says anything, I do have friends outside of him that I talk and occasionally hang out. I don't have much time for my hobbies but I do try to manage everything... I just think his attention is different and I crave it more...Tl;dr: I need more attention than bf, am I being unreasonable? Is it my anxiety striking again?
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