Extremely confused after date with the most mixed messages ever!!

I’m currently visiting the USA from a different country and thought while I’m here to try out Bumble. I matched with this really cute guy a few hours in and due to my busy schedule we didn’t have our first date penned until two weeks after we matched.

We spoke every day since we matched and even had a few phone calls and we got on really well and I definitely felt a spark there. It was all very casual but he seemed really keen to meet me.

Fast forward to the date, the day before we had agreed to meet at a certain time but for some bizarre reason he arrived TWO AND A HALF HOURS late!! After I had driven 3 hours to go spend the day with him (as we planned). The absolute kicker was he then cut the date short 3 hours early and didn’t really give an excuse as to why.

The weird thing is, throughout the date he would give me intense eye contact and be checking me out. He was making an effort with making conversation but he wasn’t very touchy. I gave him the green light to be more flirty by giving him little touches and he would give me a smile but wouldn’t reciprocate. He seemed tired and wouldn’t take his sunglasses off until we went to the darkest bar I’d ever been in.

I’m just a bit lost as to why he would waste time talking to someone for 2 weeks and then act quite platonic on the date. It wasn’t the best date in the world, I wasn’t overwhelmed but I’m just trying to get my head around what was going through his mind. Is this normal of American dating culture?



Submitted May 06, 2019 at 02:12AM

I’m currently visiting the USA from a different country and thought while I’m here to try out Bumble. I matched with this really cute guy a few hours in and due to my busy schedule we didn’t have our first date penned until two weeks after we matched.We spoke every day since we matched and even had a few phone calls and we got on really well and I definitely felt a spark there. It was all very casual but he seemed really keen to meet me.Fast forward to the date, the day before we had agreed to meet at a certain time but for some bizarre reason he arrived TWO AND A HALF HOURS late!! After I had driven 3 hours to go spend the day with him (as we planned). The absolute kicker was he then cut the date short 3 hours early and didn’t really give an excuse as to why.The weird thing is, throughout the date he would give me intense eye contact and be checking me out. He was making an effort with making conversation but he wasn’t very touchy. I gave him the green light to be more flirty by giving him little touches and he would give me a smile but wouldn’t reciprocate. He seemed tired and wouldn’t take his sunglasses off until we went to the darkest bar I’d ever been in.I’m just a bit lost as to why he would waste time talking to someone for 2 weeks and then act quite platonic on the date. It wasn’t the best date in the world, I wasn’t overwhelmed but I’m just trying to get my head around what was going through his mind. Is this normal of American dating culture?
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