How To Proceed with this date
Edit: Date got cancelled by myself, I called it off with the help of a friend. Feel free to still read if you want.
I am a mid 30s male, I haven't been on a date from a dating site in about a year and a bit. I took time away to grow and work on myself
So I definitely have upgraded my perception/outlook from before. I actively seek out red flags, analyze circumstances, and approach accordingly. I am a bit confused what to do here though.
A woman messaged me who has recently been separated for 2 months, has kids, told me it was an abusive relationship. She said on her profile she was looking for something more serious I said right off the bat I don't think I am the one you're looking for I am looking for something more casual, she then responded that every friendship has to start somewhere and it may grow into something more.
So the first red flag is that she ignored what I said and went the optimistic route, the 2nd one was her sending 4 messages, the first 2 explaining her situation, the last 2 saying she hopes she didn't scare me away and to let her know if I am not interested and to move on. All in a 15 minute span when all I was doing was showering. This 3rd red flag, I don't know if it is one or not, but she asked for more pics of me commenting that I am very attractive and hot so I sent her a couple normal ones then she sent a provocative sexy pic, I sent a couple more normal ones, then she took a new one with her shirt off grabbing her breasts. This is where I may have made a mistake because I sent a picture of myself without a shirt in return because I deemed it fair. The 4th red flag [well not a red flag but a pretext warning sign she may be in emotional turmoil] is obviously a separation.
She now wants to meet and is bringing her young son. Part of me thinks she is hoping for a quick replacement and is growing overly attached quickly. How do you suggest I proceed? I honestly would prefer some sex [hence something casual] with no strings attached but I don't think that will happen here, unless you think it's possible since it turned sexual right away?
Update: I got a close friend who I trust who has been guiding me for awhile. We typed out a message to her on the dating website saying that I thought I was available to meet new people and try dating but clearly I am not and I wish you well and hope you find the person you truly deserve and I wish you well" or something to that effect, I then erased everything on my profile and I have to wait 24 hours to delete the profile.Then I blocked her number,Firstly, I want to thank you all for taking time to respond. I honestly thought I was ready to date again but I am clearly not with the anxiety this gave me afterward, realizing I let something continue despite not thinking properly. You all helped me realize that with all of you saying to run away and to not go through with it. So thank you
Submitted April 25, 2019 at 05:29PM
Edit: Date got cancelled by myself, I called it off with the help of a friend. Feel free to still read if you want.I am a mid 30s male, I haven't been on a date from a dating site in about a year and a bit. I took time away to grow and work on myselfSo I definitely have upgraded my perception/outlook from before. I actively seek out red flags, analyze circumstances, and approach accordingly. I am a bit confused what to do here though.A woman messaged me who has recently been separated for 2 months, has kids, told me it was an abusive relationship. She said on her profile she was looking for something more serious I said right off the bat I don't think I am the one you're looking for I am looking for something more casual, she then responded that every friendship has to start somewhere and it may grow into something more.So the first red flag is that she ignored what I said and went the optimistic route, the 2nd one was her sending 4 messages, the first 2 explaining her situation, the last 2 saying she hopes she didn't scare me away and to let her know if I am not interested and to move on. All in a 15 minute span when all I was doing was showering. This 3rd red flag, I don't know if it is one or not, but she asked for more pics of me commenting that I am very attractive and hot so I sent her a couple normal ones then she sent a provocative sexy pic, I sent a couple more normal ones, then she took a new one with her shirt off grabbing her breasts. This is where I may have made a mistake because I sent a picture of myself without a shirt in return because I deemed it fair. The 4th red flag [well not a red flag but a pretext warning sign she may be in emotional turmoil] is obviously a separation.She now wants to meet and is bringing her young son. Part of me thinks she is hoping for a quick replacement and is growing overly attached quickly. How do you suggest I proceed? I honestly would prefer some sex [hence something casual] with no strings attached but I don't think that will happen here, unless you think it's possible since it turned sexual right away?Update: I got a close friend who I trust who has been guiding me for awhile. We typed out a message to her on the dating website saying that I thought I was available to meet new people and try dating but clearly I am not and I wish you well and hope you find the person you truly deserve and I wish you well" or something to that effect, I then erased everything on my profile and I have to wait 24 hours to delete the profile.Then I blocked her number,Firstly, I want to thank you all for taking time to respond. I honestly thought I was ready to date again but I am clearly not with the anxiety this gave me afterward, realizing I let something continue despite not thinking properly. You all helped me realize that with all of you saying to run away and to not go through with it. So thank you
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