Unsure to let Co-Workers (both F, 26) into my (M, 30) life

I hooked up with a co worker (Gabby) for over a month and a half, until she ghosted me. She was going through a conflict with her sexuality, and didn't know what to say to me. I was going through burning out from working and school, and I had a close friend pass away unexpectedly. I moved on, and after time, we became cool enough to still work with each other.

Gabby's bestfriend (Alice) is now one of our bosses. Within the first month, she told me "my friends are your friends so that means were friends now." I didn't know how to take it, since Gabby and I never hung out after she ghosted me, and I was on ok terms with her other friends (they have this strong core among four of them). One night, I got some drunk texts from both of them, trying to get me to go out to the bars. Alice and I continued to text each other, and I mentioned grabbing a beer since we live close by. She said we could only hang out through her friends, because shes my boss now and "there are eyes all over town"

I understood, and went out with Gabby, Alice and another friend. Alice was completely standoffish the whole time, and Gabby and I got along really well. I was put off by the night regardless, and didn't text with Alice anymore.

Just recently Alice asked me to her birthday, stating "You and I aren't friends, but you're friends with my friends. I also feel bad for you" that last part was a joke. I ended up having that specific day off, but I heard one of Alice's friend's was scheduled. Since he has a closer relationship, and I need the money, I offered to take the shift and he agreed. I have the impression Alice was upset, but I don't feel like I was in the wrong.

I've gotten a lot of support from friends outside of work to stay my ground, but I'm also still a little emotionally numb. Could use some clarity from some internet strangers maybe. I don't have anyone at work who I could confide in.

TDLR: Had a short lived fling wiht a co worker who then tried ghosting me. Her Best Friend is now our boss, and have been wanting me to hang out with them. Was invited to my bosses bday and I picked up a shift instead, and was given the impression the boss was bummed. Am I an asshole?



Submitted April 07, 2019 at 06:45AM

I hooked up with a co worker (Gabby) for over a month and a half, until she ghosted me. She was going through a conflict with her sexuality, and didn't know what to say to me. I was going through burning out from working and school, and I had a close friend pass away unexpectedly. I moved on, and after time, we became cool enough to still work with each other.Gabby's bestfriend (Alice) is now one of our bosses. Within the first month, she told me "my friends are your friends so that means were friends now." I didn't know how to take it, since Gabby and I never hung out after she ghosted me, and I was on ok terms with her other friends (they have this strong core among four of them). One night, I got some drunk texts from both of them, trying to get me to go out to the bars. Alice and I continued to text each other, and I mentioned grabbing a beer since we live close by. She said we could only hang out through her friends, because shes my boss now and "there are eyes all over town"I understood, and went out with Gabby, Alice and another friend. Alice was completely standoffish the whole time, and Gabby and I got along really well. I was put off by the night regardless, and didn't text with Alice anymore.Just recently Alice asked me to her birthday, stating "You and I aren't friends, but you're friends with my friends. I also feel bad for you" that last part was a joke. I ended up having that specific day off, but I heard one of Alice's friend's was scheduled. Since he has a closer relationship, and I need the money, I offered to take the shift and he agreed. I have the impression Alice was upset, but I don't feel like I was in the wrong.I've gotten a lot of support from friends outside of work to stay my ground, but I'm also still a little emotionally numb. Could use some clarity from some internet strangers maybe. I don't have anyone at work who I could confide in.TDLR: Had a short lived fling wiht a co worker who then tried ghosting me. Her Best Friend is now our boss, and have been wanting me to hang out with them. Was invited to my bosses bday and I picked up a shift instead, and was given the impression the boss was bummed. Am I an asshole?
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