I (30M) just came back from just over a month of travelling work and pleasure and Gf(26) says she's needs a night before seeing me. I don't feel good about this.

Context:

I'm in a 10 month relationship and had a destination wedding in south America which I turned into a trip to see family that I hadn't seen in over a decade in neighbouring countries.

GF withdraws from vacation 1 month before trip citing not feeling ready. Not enough Work vacation (3 weeks in Canada and cycle ends in April ) and because she wants to save money for another trip with friends to south east Asia. My trip concluded with a trip to florida from Thurs to sat and landing in my hometown in canada 5 hours away from where we are. I propose as a compromise she come to Florida w me I help pay for it. Declines. She's excited about trip to Asia in the next year and it hurts my feelings so shortly after she declined. We talk and feelings pass.

Weeks before the trip I get sent las min to Asia for business for 10 days. I come back for a few days but it's chaotic before heading off to SA so it feels like I haven't seen Her in Over a month.

Fast forward trip. We talk every night trip has mixed feelings of loneliness and hey this is better going solo Esp with seeing fam and flexibility. Ithe trips downs include losing my card but fam friends and herlsef help me w western union. Phew!

I fly back to my family home 5 hours away on the Saturday and return the Sunday.the week before I arrive I had proposed she come see me and we drive back together. She Initially agrees s and then declines... Communicstion also declines and she Has a weekend with friends in a closer town. As I'm driving back I still assume we'll be staying the night. I have a weird mixture of excitement and sadness to see her because of the declines and lack of communication. She messages me saying she thinks she needs a night before seeing me because I'm getting in late and we need more time for first time seeing each other in over a month also she feels weird about seeing me. This hurts... She's had over 30 nights away from me... She eventually calls and says come over.. I decline I've already committed to sleeping at a hostal(air bnb situation at my house).

We will be talking tomorrow but I'm hurt by the declines and feel she's not in the relationship anymore... Am I overreacting, am I being too sensitive and selfish/not understanding or are my feelings telling me this means something to me and hurts for a reason?

Tl:DR; GF declines going on trip with me for own reasons. Communicstion declines and Declines seeing me when I come back because she feels weird and needs a night off. I feel hurt by this string of declines and this feeling of distance.

Submitted April 08, 2019 at 06:55AM

Context:I'm in a 10 month relationship and had a destination wedding in south America which I turned into a trip to see family that I hadn't seen in over a decade in neighbouring countries.GF withdraws from vacation 1 month before trip citing not feeling ready. Not enough Work vacation (3 weeks in Canada and cycle ends in April ) and because she wants to save money for another trip with friends to south east Asia. My trip concluded with a trip to florida from Thurs to sat and landing in my hometown in canada 5 hours away from where we are. I propose as a compromise she come to Florida w me I help pay for it. Declines. She's excited about trip to Asia in the next year and it hurts my feelings so shortly after she declined. We talk and feelings pass.Weeks before the trip I get sent las min to Asia for business for 10 days. I come back for a few days but it's chaotic before heading off to SA so it feels like I haven't seen Her in Over a month.Fast forward trip. We talk every night trip has mixed feelings of loneliness and hey this is better going solo Esp with seeing fam and flexibility. Ithe trips downs include losing my card but fam friends and herlsef help me w western union. Phew!I fly back to my family home 5 hours away on the Saturday and return the Sunday.the week before I arrive I had proposed she come see me and we drive back together. She Initially agrees s and then declines... Communicstion also declines and she Has a weekend with friends in a closer town. As I'm driving back I still assume we'll be staying the night. I have a weird mixture of excitement and sadness to see her because of the declines and lack of communication. She messages me saying she thinks she needs a night before seeing me because I'm getting in late and we need more time for first time seeing each other in over a month also she feels weird about seeing me. This hurts... She's had over 30 nights away from me... She eventually calls and says come over.. I decline I've already committed to sleeping at a hostal(air bnb situation at my house).We will be talking tomorrow but I'm hurt by the declines and feel she's not in the relationship anymore... Am I overreacting, am I being too sensitive and selfish/not understanding or are my feelings telling me this means something to me and hurts for a reason?Tl:DR; GF declines going on trip with me for own reasons. Communicstion declines and Declines seeing me when I come back because she feels weird and needs a night off. I feel hurt by this string of declines and this feeling of distance.