Please help! I’m not sure what I should do in this situation! Kinda lost atm

So to give a quick overview, a friend had recommended me download OKC to try it out. So I did, a couple days in, a beautiful woman messaged me. This was at the end of March beginning of April. I’m 31m she is 26f

Kinda blew my mind, so we kept chatting, she gave me her number. I found out she lives out of state but is moving to my city mid July! I was thrilled. So we keep chatting and I let her know, I’m on my friend’s flight benefits so I can actually come see her for free. She was super happy.

She had told me though, she still lives with her ex and another roommate. They broke up because of differences in ambition and views on kids. She would assure me though that nothing is going on between them and that it’s done.

So we made plans I’d come down mid May and just stay for the weekend. Leading up to the trip, we would chat a lot every day and since we were really busy we would send quick video messages talking about our day or pictures, nothing risqué just cute ones and what not.

So I get down there, and we have a great time. We went grabbed lunch, watched a movie, and then went back to the hotel to take a nap before heading out again. While lying there, I went to kiss her and we start messing around. She had stated before I came here she doesn’t want to have sex, which I respect. So I stop fooling around and we go to sleep.

We wake up and head to the bars, there we spend maybe 6 hours or so just hanging out and drinking while talking. It’s really good conversation with the occasional make out session here and there. It was never awkward once. She does say during the night that she has always been in a long relationship so she wants to explore being single and mingling. This kinda raised a red flag for me but her body language throughout the night was saying she was into me and my company. We leave the bar and I go to take a picture with her. She gives a weak smile but takes one with me. After that we go back to the hotel, pass out and she takes me back to the airport. We embrace and kiss.

Now this is where it gets bad, I left feeling it was a solid trip but when I get back, she is no longer sending me texts, pics, or videos really. I ask her if I’m bothering her. She says she still in love with her ex and that it will probably be like that until she moves to my city. Also, I’m looking for a relationship while she isn’t and she doesn’t know what to talk to me about anymore.

I let her know that any sort of relationship starts with friendship and if it grows from there, perfect, if not, I have another friend.

Regardless of what I say, she is now distant and it feels like she ignores some of my texts. She reaches out occasionally saying some small thing but nothing like before the trip. it sucks because all I feel is as if I didn’t live up to the hype or when she saw me she was disappointed.

Should I still try to keep talking with her by sending her updates, or just leave it alone until she is up here, or just leave it alone in general? Or just wait when she messaged me and keep it light? Please help!

Update: So she texted me saying that she isn’t interested in me. And goes on to talk about how she just isn’t attracted. She thought we were gonna hit it off but that wasn’t the case in her eyes when I got down there. She thinks I’m cute and cool, her words.

I kind of don’t even wanna bother being friends with her tbh because it actually hit me a lot harder than I thought it was going too.

Submitted May 23, 2019 at 06:54PM

So to give a quick overview, a friend had recommended me download OKC to try it out. So I did, a couple days in, a beautiful woman messaged me. This was at the end of March beginning of April. I’m 31m she is 26fKinda blew my mind, so we kept chatting, she gave me her number. I found out she lives out of state but is moving to my city mid July! I was thrilled. So we keep chatting and I let her know, I’m on my friend’s flight benefits so I can actually come see her for free. She was super happy.She had told me though, she still lives with her ex and another roommate. They broke up because of differences in ambition and views on kids. She would assure me though that nothing is going on between them and that it’s done.So we made plans I’d come down mid May and just stay for the weekend. Leading up to the trip, we would chat a lot every day and since we were really busy we would send quick video messages talking about our day or pictures, nothing risqué just cute ones and what not.So I get down there, and we have a great time. We went grabbed lunch, watched a movie, and then went back to the hotel to take a nap before heading out again. While lying there, I went to kiss her and we start messing around. She had stated before I came here she doesn’t want to have sex, which I respect. So I stop fooling around and we go to sleep.We wake up and head to the bars, there we spend maybe 6 hours or so just hanging out and drinking while talking. It’s really good conversation with the occasional make out session here and there. It was never awkward once. She does say during the night that she has always been in a long relationship so she wants to explore being single and mingling. This kinda raised a red flag for me but her body language throughout the night was saying she was into me and my company. We leave the bar and I go to take a picture with her. She gives a weak smile but takes one with me. After that we go back to the hotel, pass out and she takes me back to the airport. We embrace and kiss.Now this is where it gets bad, I left feeling it was a solid trip but when I get back, she is no longer sending me texts, pics, or videos really. I ask her if I’m bothering her. She says she still in love with her ex and that it will probably be like that until she moves to my city. Also, I’m looking for a relationship while she isn’t and she doesn’t know what to talk to me about anymore.I let her know that any sort of relationship starts with friendship and if it grows from there, perfect, if not, I have another friend.Regardless of what I say, she is now distant and it feels like she ignores some of my texts. She reaches out occasionally saying some small thing but nothing like before the trip. it sucks because all I feel is as if I didn’t live up to the hype or when she saw me she was disappointed.Should I still try to keep talking with her by sending her updates, or just leave it alone until she is up here, or just leave it alone in general? Or just wait when she messaged me and keep it light? Please help!Update: So she texted me saying that she isn’t interested in me. And goes on to talk about how she just isn’t attracted. She thought we were gonna hit it off but that wasn’t the case in her eyes when I got down there. She thinks I’m cute and cool, her words.I kind of don’t even wanna bother being friends with her tbh because it actually hit me a lot harder than I thought it was going too.