He was in a bad mood because he found out his ex has had a baby

I’ve been with my boyfriend for four months and he’s always been very open with me about the fact that his ex broke his heart by leaving him. This was four years ago and he said he was a horrible person for a long time afterwards and that he treated women like shit as he was so bitter. He said he slept with as many women as he could and ended up having a problem with alcohol and drugs. Then I came along and he said I was the first woman he’d met since her that he genuinely liked and wanted a relationship with.

Yesterday evening when I went to his house he was in a foul mood. After a bit of probing it turns out he found out that his ex has had a baby. He said that he was nearly physically sick when he found out and then admitted that she was the one who got away, and that he will always regret messing things up with her. I’ve always known their break up had affected him as he mentions her often but his reaction last night seemed quite extreme. He even said, “I’m with you and you’re cool but this news has thrown me.” Then he was asking me whether he should reach out to her to congratulate her.

I feel like he’s not over her at all. He has admitted he has a lot of personal issues to work through and that he struggles with bad moods (which I have witnessed on a couple of occasions and which I find hard to deal With as he becomes very cold). The last time he was in a bad mood I told him that I couldn’t deal with the constant up and downs and he started crying and said he didn’t want to lose me. However he also said he didn’t want to have conversations like that with me any more as he finds them ‘draining’ and he doesn’t feel as though he should prove to me that he likes me.

While we’ve been together he’s let himself go and put on a lot of weight. He doesn’t seem to be motivated to go to the gym and he eats a lot of crap food but instead of doing something about it he just moans to me. He’s nearly walked out of his job a few times too due to several perceived slights (usually someone telling him off about something he’s done wrong).

Perhaps the worst thing is that my younger brother passed away suddenly a year ago and I’m still trying to come to terms with that. I rarely talk about it to my boyfriend as he seems to think that his problems trump everyone else’s. I’m just finding life very hard right now and I’ve decided to walk away from this one, I guess I just need reassurance that I’m doing the right thing.

UPDATE: I’ve called him and told him it’s over. He said he’s angry and upset that I’ve done this and then tried to tell me that I was the one with a problem. He the. tried to fight for me and said I was amazing but I stood my ground and told him it’s over. The relief is immense.

Submitted May 08, 2019 at 04:19PM

I’ve been with my boyfriend for four months and he’s always been very open with me about the fact that his ex broke his heart by leaving him. This was four years ago and he said he was a horrible person for a long time afterwards and that he treated women like shit as he was so bitter. He said he slept with as many women as he could and ended up having a problem with alcohol and drugs. Then I came along and he said I was the first woman he’d met since her that he genuinely liked and wanted a relationship with.Yesterday evening when I went to his house he was in a foul mood. After a bit of probing it turns out he found out that his ex has had a baby. He said that he was nearly physically sick when he found out and then admitted that she was the one who got away, and that he will always regret messing things up with her. I’ve always known their break up had affected him as he mentions her often but his reaction last night seemed quite extreme. He even said, “I’m with you and you’re cool but this news has thrown me.” Then he was asking me whether he should reach out to her to congratulate her.I feel like he’s not over her at all. He has admitted he has a lot of personal issues to work through and that he struggles with bad moods (which I have witnessed on a couple of occasions and which I find hard to deal With as he becomes very cold). The last time he was in a bad mood I told him that I couldn’t deal with the constant up and downs and he started crying and said he didn’t want to lose me. However he also said he didn’t want to have conversations like that with me any more as he finds them ‘draining’ and he doesn’t feel as though he should prove to me that he likes me.While we’ve been together he’s let himself go and put on a lot of weight. He doesn’t seem to be motivated to go to the gym and he eats a lot of crap food but instead of doing something about it he just moans to me. He’s nearly walked out of his job a few times too due to several perceived slights (usually someone telling him off about something he’s done wrong).Perhaps the worst thing is that my younger brother passed away suddenly a year ago and I’m still trying to come to terms with that. I rarely talk about it to my boyfriend as he seems to think that his problems trump everyone else’s. I’m just finding life very hard right now and I’ve decided to walk away from this one, I guess I just need reassurance that I’m doing the right thing.UPDATE: I’ve called him and told him it’s over. He said he’s angry and upset that I’ve done this and then tried to tell me that I was the one with a problem. He the. tried to fight for me and said I was amazing but I stood my ground and told him it’s over. The relief is immense.