My boyfriend made travel plans without me and I found out via Instagram

I (23F) have been with my boyfriend (24M) for 3 years now, we also live together. My boyfriend has apparently made plans to go travelling to Asia and Europe at the end of the year which is great however... it seems like he wants to go travelling solo, as he hasn't talked to me at all about his plans or really bought it up with me before, I only found out because he posted on his Instagram story asking if anyone else would be in Asia/Europe around those times..

I have always wanted to travel to Asia and Europe and if it were also with him that would be even better. We've made loose travel "plans" in the past, however they were never set in stone due to me completing university and both of us not having enough money saved up. I have just started a new job after uni, so being able to save money for travel is a new thing for me, whereas he has been working full-time for a while now and has started saving money.

I guess I just feel frustrated at the lack of communication from him, when I bring it up he kind of just brushes it off and says to start saving but never wants to make any concrete plans with me. The fact that he's telling people on Instagram when he'll be in Europe, shows me that he seems to have made concrete plans in place without me. This makes me feel almost betrayed because he's not being honest about this situation with me.

I don't know how I'm suppose to feel about it this, on one hand I understand that travelling solo is something that people want to do in order to grow and become your own person and that's great but I wish he would be honest with me and tell me straight up, however on the other hand I feel upset and just hurt because if he doesn't want to go travelling with me, what does that mean for us in the future? Do I just have to wait here for him while he's off seeing in the world? No thanks.

I'm unsure if I should bring this all up when I see him next, or will I just sound like a crazy person? I honestly can't tell if my feelings are valid about this situation.

TL;DR : My long-term boyfriend seems to have made solo travel plans without involving me or communicating them with me, I only found out because he posted them on Instagram, I feel upset and don't know if I'm overreacting and if I should bring it up with him.



Submitted April 27, 2019 at 06:16AM

I (23F) have been with my boyfriend (24M) for 3 years now, we also live together. My boyfriend has apparently made plans to go travelling to Asia and Europe at the end of the year which is great however... it seems like he wants to go travelling solo, as he hasn't talked to me at all about his plans or really bought it up with me before, I only found out because he posted on his Instagram story asking if anyone else would be in Asia/Europe around those times..I have always wanted to travel to Asia and Europe and if it were also with him that would be even better. We've made loose travel "plans" in the past, however they were never set in stone due to me completing university and both of us not having enough money saved up. I have just started a new job after uni, so being able to save money for travel is a new thing for me, whereas he has been working full-time for a while now and has started saving money.I guess I just feel frustrated at the lack of communication from him, when I bring it up he kind of just brushes it off and says to start saving but never wants to make any concrete plans with me. The fact that he's telling people on Instagram when he'll be in Europe, shows me that he seems to have made concrete plans in place without me. This makes me feel almost betrayed because he's not being honest about this situation with me.I don't know how I'm suppose to feel about it this, on one hand I understand that travelling solo is something that people want to do in order to grow and become your own person and that's great but I wish he would be honest with me and tell me straight up, however on the other hand I feel upset and just hurt because if he doesn't want to go travelling with me, what does that mean for us in the future? Do I just have to wait here for him while he's off seeing in the world? No thanks.I'm unsure if I should bring this all up when I see him next, or will I just sound like a crazy person? I honestly can't tell if my feelings are valid about this situation.​​TL;DR : My long-term boyfriend seems to have made solo travel plans without involving me or communicating them with me, I only found out because he posted them on Instagram, I feel upset and don't know if I'm overreacting and if I should bring it up with him.

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