My [25F] girlfriend is being very discouraging to me [27M] about my decisions to lose weight and join the military

So for some background, I have been with my girlfriend for close to 2 years now. For the most part our relationship is good. We’ve had our ups and downs like any other couple but I love her and she loves me.

So the issue he is that I am tired of the direction my life is going. I am stuck in retail and hate it. After some time reflecting on everything in my life, I have decided that I want to join the military. To do this I have to lose around 60 pounds (I’ve already lost about 15, which I am very happy about). I know I can do this and after that I will be able to join and get some direction in my life. I have a plan laid out and I am willing and ready for the challenges that lie ahead of me. But my girlfriend is being very difficult about it. I understand some of her frustrations but at the same time I hate how hostile and discouraging she is about the whole thing.

She makes derogatory comments about the whole thing, about the military and says she can’t believe she would ever be with someone who could be in the military. She says she refuses to wait for me and refuses to be in a long distance relationship. She’ll say things like “I hope your new life is better and happier and you treat your new girlfriend better than you treat me”. She comes over to my place and brings food she know I don’t want to eat and she’ll leave it there. Knowing I’d feel guilty about throwing it away. It’s getting to the point where it hurts to talk to her because all she does is makes me feel bad about my decisions. I don’t know what to do, this is the only relationship I’ve ever been in and I don’t know how to handle this.

TLDR: I have decided I want to join the military and my girlfriend is trying to sabotage my decision



Submitted April 27, 2019 at 05:12AM

So for some background, I have been with my girlfriend for close to 2 years now. For the most part our relationship is good. We’ve had our ups and downs like any other couple but I love her and she loves me.So the issue he is that I am tired of the direction my life is going. I am stuck in retail and hate it. After some time reflecting on everything in my life, I have decided that I want to join the military. To do this I have to lose around 60 pounds (I’ve already lost about 15, which I am very happy about). I know I can do this and after that I will be able to join and get some direction in my life. I have a plan laid out and I am willing and ready for the challenges that lie ahead of me. But my girlfriend is being very difficult about it. I understand some of her frustrations but at the same time I hate how hostile and discouraging she is about the whole thing.She makes derogatory comments about the whole thing, about the military and says she can’t believe she would ever be with someone who could be in the military. She says she refuses to wait for me and refuses to be in a long distance relationship. She’ll say things like “I hope your new life is better and happier and you treat your new girlfriend better than you treat me”. She comes over to my place and brings food she know I don’t want to eat and she’ll leave it there. Knowing I’d feel guilty about throwing it away. It’s getting to the point where it hurts to talk to her because all she does is makes me feel bad about my decisions. I don’t know what to do, this is the only relationship I’ve ever been in and I don’t know how to handle this.TLDR: I have decided I want to join the military and my girlfriend is trying to sabotage my decision
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