An ex(29f) propossed what i think is a FWB situation to me(31m)

Sorry for the long post, just want to give some context. We met about 7 years ago at work. We weren't friends but we were generally nice to eachother and had an attraction to eachother. I was with someone at the time and didn't make anything of it despite her being vocal about it. I left that job and didn't really keep in contact with her.

About 3 years ago we reconnected and began seeing eachother. At the time, she had just recently split from her fiancee and her child's father. I didn't know it was recent but when i found out, i knew that it was a bad idea to get involved with someone fresh out of a situation like that. We dated for about 6 months and it was amazing, i haven't felt anything like that before or since. Even though it was great, i knew that she wanted to try and get her family back together. We split so she can try and do that.

Since then ive been doing the OLD thing, i have met some interesting people and it has given me the experience in dating that i needed since my 7 year relationship ended 4 years ago. She reached out to me in November and we have been talking since, since then i dated other people with no luck but we kept in touch this whole time. I decided a few weeks ago to take a break from OLD since it was draining to be constantly meeting new people.

We were talking and she was very transparent about not being in the right place after she split with her fiance the first time and didn't want to make the same mistake again. She has said that she has had some one night stands since splitting up with her fiance for the allegedly final time last September. Which i think is a good sign of her moving on. She has told me numerous times how she feels for me, that she will alwats have a soft spot for me and hasn't met anyone like me.

I started to really consider seeing again recently due to her seeming to be in a good place mentally and emotionally. But she has said that she is currently not looking for a relationship but wants to see me. Her exact words was "I'm not friendzoneing you(i hate that term) but I don't want to just hook up. Let's just see eachother and see where it goes."

While i want to see her im just not sure how to go about this. I don't want to repeat the same mistake as last time but out of all the women i have been involved with, none has been so consistent in keeping in contact with me despite me being apprehensive and trying to pull away at times. I really believe how she feels. I dont know what kind of advice I'm looking for but what are your thoughts?

TL;DR: an ex after 2 years wants a fwb situation with me after an intense first encounter.



Submitted April 19, 2019 at 01:18PM

Sorry for the long post, just want to give some context. We met about 7 years ago at work. We weren't friends but we were generally nice to eachother and had an attraction to eachother. I was with someone at the time and didn't make anything of it despite her being vocal about it. I left that job and didn't really keep in contact with her.About 3 years ago we reconnected and began seeing eachother. At the time, she had just recently split from her fiancee and her child's father. I didn't know it was recent but when i found out, i knew that it was a bad idea to get involved with someone fresh out of a situation like that. We dated for about 6 months and it was amazing, i haven't felt anything like that before or since. Even though it was great, i knew that she wanted to try and get her family back together. We split so she can try and do that.Since then ive been doing the OLD thing, i have met some interesting people and it has given me the experience in dating that i needed since my 7 year relationship ended 4 years ago. She reached out to me in November and we have been talking since, since then i dated other people with no luck but we kept in touch this whole time. I decided a few weeks ago to take a break from OLD since it was draining to be constantly meeting new people.We were talking and she was very transparent about not being in the right place after she split with her fiance the first time and didn't want to make the same mistake again. She has said that she has had some one night stands since splitting up with her fiance for the allegedly final time last September. Which i think is a good sign of her moving on. She has told me numerous times how she feels for me, that she will alwats have a soft spot for me and hasn't met anyone like me.I started to really consider seeing again recently due to her seeming to be in a good place mentally and emotionally. But she has said that she is currently not looking for a relationship but wants to see me. Her exact words was "I'm not friendzoneing you(i hate that term) but I don't want to just hook up. Let's just see eachother and see where it goes."While i want to see her im just not sure how to go about this. I don't want to repeat the same mistake as last time but out of all the women i have been involved with, none has been so consistent in keeping in contact with me despite me being apprehensive and trying to pull away at times. I really believe how she feels. I dont know what kind of advice I'm looking for but what are your thoughts?TL;DR: an ex after 2 years wants a fwb situation with me after an intense first encounter.
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Add Comments, Posts, Links... etc.

Popular posts from this blog

The difference between being right and being understood

My boyfriend and I are 28. We’ve been together for about 1.5 years and recently moved in together. He’s a pretty patient and easygoing person (Type B) whereas I’m more particular (Type A). Of course there are two sides to every trait, and my Type A nature benefits us in some ways too. Like all couples, we have differences in perspective or preference. When this happens, he will usually say something like “I disagree (with your perspective) but fine.” I tend to push the issue in an attempt to get him to understand where I’m coming from. This escalates the disagreement into a fight because he perceives it as me trying to be “right”. I truly just want to be understood (and I want to understand where he’s coming from) so I’m looking for more of a dialogue whereas he avoids conflict and just wants it to be over as quickly as possible. His general approach is “agree to disagree” but that doesn’t make sense to me when it’s an issue that will keep coming up and requires compromise. I’m n...
Read more

My (27f) gf (27f) is getting tired of me not sharing intimate/ personal info about me

I’ve always been extremely private and introverted. We have more than a year together and we’ve been living together for like 6 months, we get along pretty good and I’m really in love with her, however I can not seem to open up... and I can tell it’s frustrating to her by the way she tells me it bothers her that she feels she’s the only one committed and the one that’s always sharing... At this point I don’t even know if it is that I’ve gotten too used to it, to the point I’ve became lazy to talk about myself or give any genuine personal opinion... it sucks, really, I need to communicate better... Where do I start? Tl;dr: I can’t be completely intimate with my gf and its frustrating her, I need to communicate better because I really love her... where to start? Submitted April 25, 2019 at 06:02AM I’ve always been extremely private and introverted. We have more than a year together and we’ve been living together for like 6 months, we get along pretty good and I’m really in love ...
Read more

My (23M) girlfriend (25F) relationship is confusing to me. I might be the problem, or maybe we are just incompatible.

I met my girlfriend after a few serious breakups that led me to change both intentionally and unintentionally over a few years. For better and for worse. She had just gotten out of an engagement with a verbally and physically abusive man who had a cocaine problem. We have been together about 8 months now. We hit it off and spent a lot of time together but she began to push our relationship as if there were a time clock for milestones. I was pressed beyond my comfort zone and went with it because of my affection for her. My living situation fell apart and I lost a few thousand dollars to shit roommates right around the time she and I met and she offered to let me stay with her. I agreed with some resistance. I pay for food, help her with bills, and throw money toward rent while trying to get back on my feet. As long as we have been together she has gotten more possessive, angry, and irrational. She is dealing with shit from her engagement and I feel shes looking for a level of seriou...
Read more