Hormone therapy causing issues in marriage?

I've never posted before so hopefully this is in the right area.

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I need some advice as I'm going through some really difficult times. I dont really know where to begin. My husband and I have been together since high school. We were married in our 20s and have always had a great relationship , minimal arguing - lots of love for each other. We had difficulty getting pregnant with our first child but after 2 years of trying we finally had a baby girl, after that I always wanted more children but knew it might not happen. We both decided not to try for more babies , but "whatever happens, happens" 9 years later my husband quit his long time well paying job , and the next month we found out I was pregnant - with twins.

So this has been a lot of surprise and stress in our life , financially its a curve ball for sure but nothing we cant handle. After the babies were born (april 2018) - my husband was having a lot of issues , depressed, moody but I also had postpartum depression so we thought it was along the same lines for him. He went to the Dr after several months of this when he started to realize that he had no patience and had no want to help with the babies or even hold them. They of course told him it was a stress reaction, normal and did some blood tests which showed him to have extremely low testosterone. They started him on injections (September 2018) and at first it was great, his mood improved. sex life improved - it was like having my husband back - his levels were closer to normal and they decided to keep him on it for a few more months.

I cant pin point when things went south from there. He started talking a lot about things that seemed strange to me, became distant from me , stopped hugging me or sending me nice texts - always seemed like I had made him angry. Then he came out and told me that he thinks I cheated on him 17 years ago (5 years before we were even married) and that he has never been happy with our marriage and that he regrets staying with me after that ( I didnt cheat on him and he refuses to believe me) he says he knows that I'm lying and hiding it from him and this is very frustrating because I am not. I have always been faithful to him. I have asked him to see a counselor and he refuses, I am afraid his testosterone levels or something else is causing him to be moody and down right delusional - he says that is not the issue , that he has been hiding his unhappiness from me for all these years and has finally decided its time to stop. We have always been happy together though so that really doesnt make sense to me. I feel like I'm in a fog trying to figure it all out. Could he really have fooled me for that long and played such a good part at being the happy husband and dad that I had no clue? If he told me he doesnt want the responsibility I could understand and respect that more than this "you cheated on me 17 years ago" thing that has no merit.

Submitted May 22, 2019 at 04:12PM

I've never posted before so hopefully this is in the right area.​I need some advice as I'm going through some really difficult times. I dont really know where to begin. My husband and I have been together since high school. We were married in our 20s and have always had a great relationship , minimal arguing - lots of love for each other. We had difficulty getting pregnant with our first child but after 2 years of trying we finally had a baby girl, after that I always wanted more children but knew it might not happen. We both decided not to try for more babies , but "whatever happens, happens" 9 years later my husband quit his long time well paying job , and the next month we found out I was pregnant - with twins.So this has been a lot of surprise and stress in our life , financially its a curve ball for sure but nothing we cant handle. After the babies were born (april 2018) - my husband was having a lot of issues , depressed, moody but I also had postpartum depression so we thought it was along the same lines for him. He went to the Dr after several months of this when he started to realize that he had no patience and had no want to help with the babies or even hold them. They of course told him it was a stress reaction, normal and did some blood tests which showed him to have extremely low testosterone. They started him on injections (September 2018) and at first it was great, his mood improved. sex life improved - it was like having my husband back - his levels were closer to normal and they decided to keep him on it for a few more months.I cant pin point when things went south from there. He started talking a lot about things that seemed strange to me, became distant from me , stopped hugging me or sending me nice texts - always seemed like I had made him angry. Then he came out and told me that he thinks I cheated on him 17 years ago (5 years before we were even married) and that he has never been happy with our marriage and that he regrets staying with me after that ( I didnt cheat on him and he refuses to believe me) he says he knows that I'm lying and hiding it from him and this is very frustrating because I am not. I have always been faithful to him. I have asked him to see a counselor and he refuses, I am afraid his testosterone levels or something else is causing him to be moody and down right delusional - he says that is not the issue , that he has been hiding his unhappiness from me for all these years and has finally decided its time to stop. We have always been happy together though so that really doesnt make sense to me. I feel like I'm in a fog trying to figure it all out. Could he really have fooled me for that long and played such a good part at being the happy husband and dad that I had no clue? If he told me he doesnt want the responsibility I could understand and respect that more than this "you cheated on me 17 years ago" thing that has no merit.