My [29M] with my OkCupid date [22F] mislead me about having kids and I have no idea what to do

I went on my first date since 2012 last night. I'm chronically single since 2009 and super desperate. I had a lot in common with this girl, and we had very deep and genuine conversation and just clicked in so many ways. It was originally just suppose to be a coffee date, but we ended up going for a walk in the park, and then getting dinner at a fancy restaurant. Then she came to my place and we continued our deep conversations and we did end up having sex. I never thought I would have sex on a first date, especially since it was my first time since 2009. Our connection just seemed so deep and it happened.

Fast forward to today, I text her and say I want to see her again tonight. She just casually mentions that she needs to find a babysitter. I have not texted her since and am just thinking WTF. She did not answer the do you have children on her OkCupid profile, but I think she should have mentioned during our conversations, especially given the deep nature of them. I also answered the question on OkCupid about would you date someone who has kids as no, and it was something we both marked unacceptable.

At this point, I just don't know what to do. I'm depressed and incredibly lonely. I have no self confidence at all when it comes to dating, and suddenly, this hot girl is in to me despite the fact I am 5'11 and about 215 pounds.

I also feel used and like a cheap whore. Like I seriously never thought I would sleep with someone until we had a meaningful committed relationship I kind of feel taken advantage of. At the same time though I totally enjoyed my time with her, I am so tired of being lonlenly and not having any kind of intimate relationship where I can just talk about my day to someone who cares, or be held, do something for them, have them do stuff for me. I'm running full of emotions now and very confused.

TL;DR Girl mislead me into thinking she didn't have kids via her online dating profile. Turns out she does and I have no idea what to do.



Submitted May 19, 2019 at 10:44PM

I went on my first date since 2012 last night. I'm chronically single since 2009 and super desperate. I had a lot in common with this girl, and we had very deep and genuine conversation and just clicked in so many ways. It was originally just suppose to be a coffee date, but we ended up going for a walk in the park, and then getting dinner at a fancy restaurant. Then she came to my place and we continued our deep conversations and we did end up having sex. I never thought I would have sex on a first date, especially since it was my first time since 2009. Our connection just seemed so deep and it happened.Fast forward to today, I text her and say I want to see her again tonight. She just casually mentions that she needs to find a babysitter. I have not texted her since and am just thinking WTF. She did not answer the do you have children on her OkCupid profile, but I think she should have mentioned during our conversations, especially given the deep nature of them. I also answered the question on OkCupid about would you date someone who has kids as no, and it was something we both marked unacceptable.At this point, I just don't know what to do. I'm depressed and incredibly lonely. I have no self confidence at all when it comes to dating, and suddenly, this hot girl is in to me despite the fact I am 5'11 and about 215 pounds.I also feel used and like a cheap whore. Like I seriously never thought I would sleep with someone until we had a meaningful committed relationship I kind of feel taken advantage of. At the same time though I totally enjoyed my time with her, I am so tired of being lonlenly and not having any kind of intimate relationship where I can just talk about my day to someone who cares, or be held, do something for them, have them do stuff for me. I'm running full of emotions now and very confused.TL;DR Girl mislead me into thinking she didn't have kids via her online dating profile. Turns out she does and I have no idea what to do.
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