Do you ever have doubts about the longevity of your marriage? My spouse and I have been married nearly three years and I find myself harboring doubts about whether we are meant for each other.

We don't have any major problems and we are in couples counseling to fix the problems we do have, but every once in a while these doubts creep in. The conversation of kids has been coming up a lot recently. I very much want children and typically feel confident in my choice of partner, but occasionally feel very hesitant.

Here are some of the reasons I feel doubtful and hesitant: -Spouse struggles with seeing me as a priority. This has been a major point of contention in our marriage and one that we address frequently. -Spouse is often narrowly focused on things that are going on and fails to "come up for air" and connect with me/help me in things I need help in (such as puppy training). -I don't feel particularly special or important. I feel as though I am just another family member. -We have different ideas on what proper parenting looks like. -When I address an issue I am having, spouse gives excuses and blames the issue on some external factor (medication, being tired, etc) so does not take responsibility.

I'm just looking for some solid advice. Is this normal? Is this not normal? If you've experienced the same thing, what was the outcome?

Submitted May 19, 2019 at 02:35AM

We don't have any major problems and we are in couples counseling to fix the problems we do have, but every once in a while these doubts creep in. The conversation of kids has been coming up a lot recently. I very much want children and typically feel confident in my choice of partner, but occasionally feel very hesitant.Here are some of the reasons I feel doubtful and hesitant: -Spouse struggles with seeing me as a priority. This has been a major point of contention in our marriage and one that we address frequently. -Spouse is often narrowly focused on things that are going on and fails to "come up for air" and connect with me/help me in things I need help in (such as puppy training). -I don't feel particularly special or important. I feel as though I am just another family member. -We have different ideas on what proper parenting looks like. -When I address an issue I am having, spouse gives excuses and blames the issue on some external factor (medication, being tired, etc) so does not take responsibility.I'm just looking for some solid advice. Is this normal? Is this not normal? If you've experienced the same thing, what was the outcome?