An Example of the Rude, & how to explain it?

I have a relationship issue ive been trying to discuss with my husband. I never seem to have the right example of what I mean. When I try to explain, how he talks to me is really rude, he asks for an example and I dont have one.

Yesterday though, it happened. Hes laid up with an injury and we had a freak windstorm and it blew over our patio table & umbrella. I didn't even know it got blown over until that morning and it was early evening & I was just ticking things off my to do list, didn't think that issue was super pressing. I mean, it was already tipped over, it wasn't going to get even more tipped over.

He hobbles into the kitchen while im making dinner and says, "We just gonna leave the table & umbrella tipped over forever now? I only spent days fixing the bent umbrella before. Who cares right?"...

I was dumbfounded by his attitude and wanted to lay into him about it, but instead I looked him straight in the eyes and said in my most serious "dont fuck with me" tone, "I think you mean to say, 'honey, will you please go put the patio furniture upright, im afraid the umbrella I already fixed once might be getting bent.'. Right? Thats what you meant to say to me?"...

He rolled his eyes and wandered off, no apology for his tone/attitude with me, refused to acknowledge that he "came at me" with the wrong frame of mind.

Thats what he does though, he never speaks nicely to me, everything is a....I dont know what to call it, I dont know how to describe what he is doing. Which is why I just explained a real example of it. He speaks to me rudely, but its more than that.



Submitted May 20, 2019 at 06:29PM

I have a relationship issue ive been trying to discuss with my husband. I never seem to have the right example of what I mean. When I try to explain, how he talks to me is really rude, he asks for an example and I dont have one.Yesterday though, it happened. Hes laid up with an injury and we had a freak windstorm and it blew over our patio table & umbrella. I didn't even know it got blown over until that morning and it was early evening & I was just ticking things off my to do list, didn't think that issue was super pressing. I mean, it was already tipped over, it wasn't going to get even more tipped over.He hobbles into the kitchen while im making dinner and says, "We just gonna leave the table & umbrella tipped over forever now? I only spent days fixing the bent umbrella before. Who cares right?"...I was dumbfounded by his attitude and wanted to lay into him about it, but instead I looked him straight in the eyes and said in my most serious "dont fuck with me" tone, "I think you mean to say, 'honey, will you please go put the patio furniture upright, im afraid the umbrella I already fixed once might be getting bent.'. Right? Thats what you meant to say to me?"...He rolled his eyes and wandered off, no apology for his tone/attitude with me, refused to acknowledge that he "came at me" with the wrong frame of mind.Thats what he does though, he never speaks nicely to me, everything is a....I dont know what to call it, I dont know how to describe what he is doing. Which is why I just explained a real example of it. He speaks to me rudely, but its more than that.
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