/u/vorellaraek on I'm an aromantic, but maybe some kind of asexual?

so first, congrats on figuring out the aro part

this shit is hard, and only you can choose what fits

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here's a few things that might be helpful

- it's about what label best communicates how you currently feel - they're descriptive, not prescriptive, and they're allowed to change

-asexuality is only about what sexual attraction you do or don't feel

-grey asexuality is the broad grey area between asexual and not, generally involving sexual attraction that's rare/fleeting/situational/otherwise reduced or atypical (it does sound like you could fit there if you chose to label yourself that way)

-sexual desire, masturbation, porn, even actual sex aren't necessarily contradictory with asexuality even before grey identities get involved - not being attracted to people tends to make sex less interesting, but it doesn't determine your sex drive or guarantee your actions

-demi is about not feeling attraction at all without a connection, and akoi about attraction that fades when reciprocated - whether you act on it isn't the same as whether you feel it

-you may or may not find some use in aegosexual, which is basically arousal disconnected from you - so fantasy and masturbation might be great, but the interest fades when you're in the fantasy or it might happen in real life

May 14, 2019 at 06:39AM