My(23M) GF(22F) is upset because I did not return to my old ways. No clue what's going on. Help?

Hey guys, first time posting. Kind of confused and I just need help on what to do next. Never had this sort of thing happen before. I'll try not to ramble. Also, sorry for any formatting issues.

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My gf and I have been in a relationship for almost 3 years. We are pretty good together, and vibe on a level I have never experienced with any other woman. I love her to death and will do almost anything to ensure her happiness. She means everything to me and I try my hardest to be the best person I can be for her. We actually moved in together about a few months ago and I have been stoked ever since moving in. So far, I like our relationship, and try to make sure it only goes up.

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Now a little background: At the beginning of our relationship, we had some issues. At the beginning she seemed like this carefree woman that didn't seem to mind me having a few close friendships with my female friends. I'm not the jealous type at all, and when she would seem cool with me having a lot of women as friends, I thought she was same. That is not the case.

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Over the first few months, her true feelings about my friendships started to come out. Every now and then she would make it a concern of how I talked to these women. She said that I was inappropriate with these girls because of our topics of discussion and that gentle flirting was going on, for example, I would compliment on a friend's outfit or new tattoo and vice versa. With my friends, we would talk about everything under the sun including sex, a taboo topic according to my gf. She would insinuate that something was up between these women and I (there wasn't) and that our communications was proof of that. I tried to make this clear that this is how I talk to almost everybody, even guys, and I did not make an effort to hide this. My gf knew all of this from before we dated. Suffice to say, she either did not want me contacting these girls at all, or change my behavior around them.

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I admittedly had a hard time coming to terms with her boundaries. Most of these women I have known longer than I have known my gf, and we have maintained this level of communication for many years. I just didn't see what she saw so it took some times to eventual come to the grips that I am basically hurting my gf, something I do not want to do so I took a step back. I made an effort to not be as close to these woman as before while still maintaining a healthy relationship that satisfies both my friends and my gf. I have grown a lot, apologized for my reckless behavior, and promised not to do anything that can hurt or betray my gf.

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Fast forward to now. About two weeks ago, my gf called me a few times out of the blue. I unfortunately missed these calls and immediately called her back. I asked her if something was the matter because she normally doesn't call me as much, we usually just texts. She told me that she just had a funny feeling and pretty much grilled me about my past behavior and asked if I was still doing it. She asked if I texted anybody inappropriately recently, have a made new female friends, if I was hiding anything and so forth.

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This of course blindsided me cause I have no clue where this is coming from. I answered her questions as honest as I could, told her that I haven't done anything like that since the last time we discussed it, which would be more than 2 years ago, and tried to reassure her that nothing is going on. I asked her what's going on and she replied to something like "Oh, everything has been going too well. I know how you are with women so I know something is up." At this point I am flabbergasted and told her not to try to make problems out of nothing. She said this is a woman type of thing and an issue that they go through, but all my previous ex's never did this sort of thing.

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Ever since then she's been acting funny. Like I said, this is going on 2 weeks and she still seems upset about it. She doesn't really initiate conversation, kissing, cuddling, nothing anymore. I feel like I'm forcing her to do these things and it's starting to have an effect on me. I honestly do not know what to do at this point. I've tried talking to her to get to the root of this, but she won't budge. How can I fix something when she won't tell me what the problem is?

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Additional Info: I try to steer clear of topics involving my female friends with my gf. I noticed every time I speak about a female friend of mine, she would get visibly upset, but will try to play it off. I also try to limit how much I text people around my gf. I try to focus my attention on my gf when she is present because I feel it's disrespectful to be on your phone in front of others. I'm honestly starting to feel drained being on eggshells all the time.

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Any advise will help. I appreciate the time to read all of this. Thanks!

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TLDR; My girlfriend has been upset with me because I have not gone back to my old ways that broke her boundaries. I am at a complete loss for what to do.

Submitted April 25, 2019 at 06:47AM

Hey guys, first time posting. Kind of confused and I just need help on what to do next. Never had this sort of thing happen before. I'll try not to ramble. Also, sorry for any formatting issues.​My gf and I have been in a relationship for almost 3 years. We are pretty good together, and vibe on a level I have never experienced with any other woman. I love her to death and will do almost anything to ensure her happiness. She means everything to me and I try my hardest to be the best person I can be for her. We actually moved in together about a few months ago and I have been stoked ever since moving in. So far, I like our relationship, and try to make sure it only goes up.​Now a little background: At the beginning of our relationship, we had some issues. At the beginning she seemed like this carefree woman that didn't seem to mind me having a few close friendships with my female friends. I'm not the jealous type at all, and when she would seem cool with me having a lot of women as friends, I thought she was same. That is not the case.​Over the first few months, her true feelings about my friendships started to come out. Every now and then she would make it a concern of how I talked to these women. She said that I was inappropriate with these girls because of our topics of discussion and that gentle flirting was going on, for example, I would compliment on a friend's outfit or new tattoo and vice versa. With my friends, we would talk about everything under the sun including sex, a taboo topic according to my gf. She would insinuate that something was up between these women and I (there wasn't) and that our communications was proof of that. I tried to make this clear that this is how I talk to almost everybody, even guys, and I did not make an effort to hide this. My gf knew all of this from before we dated. Suffice to say, she either did not want me contacting these girls at all, or change my behavior around them.​I admittedly had a hard time coming to terms with her boundaries. Most of these women I have known longer than I have known my gf, and we have maintained this level of communication for many years. I just didn't see what she saw so it took some times to eventual come to the grips that I am basically hurting my gf, something I do not want to do so I took a step back. I made an effort to not be as close to these woman as before while still maintaining a healthy relationship that satisfies both my friends and my gf. I have grown a lot, apologized for my reckless behavior, and promised not to do anything that can hurt or betray my gf.​Fast forward to now. About two weeks ago, my gf called me a few times out of the blue. I unfortunately missed these calls and immediately called her back. I asked her if something was the matter because she normally doesn't call me as much, we usually just texts. She told me that she just had a funny feeling and pretty much grilled me about my past behavior and asked if I was still doing it. She asked if I texted anybody inappropriately recently, have a made new female friends, if I was hiding anything and so forth.​This of course blindsided me cause I have no clue where this is coming from. I answered her questions as honest as I could, told her that I haven't done anything like that since the last time we discussed it, which would be more than 2 years ago, and tried to reassure her that nothing is going on. I asked her what's going on and she replied to something like "Oh, everything has been going too well. I know how you are with women so I know something is up." At this point I am flabbergasted and told her not to try to make problems out of nothing. She said this is a woman type of thing and an issue that they go through, but all my previous ex's never did this sort of thing.​Ever since then she's been acting funny. Like I said, this is going on 2 weeks and she still seems upset about it. She doesn't really initiate conversation, kissing, cuddling, nothing anymore. I feel like I'm forcing her to do these things and it's starting to have an effect on me. I honestly do not know what to do at this point. I've tried talking to her to get to the root of this, but she won't budge. How can I fix something when she won't tell me what the problem is?​Additional Info: I try to steer clear of topics involving my female friends with my gf. I noticed every time I speak about a female friend of mine, she would get visibly upset, but will try to play it off. I also try to limit how much I text people around my gf. I try to focus my attention on my gf when she is present because I feel it's disrespectful to be on your phone in front of others. I'm honestly starting to feel drained being on eggshells all the time.​Any advise will help. I appreciate the time to read all of this. Thanks!​TLDR; My girlfriend has been upset with me because I have not gone back to my old ways that broke her boundaries. I am at a complete loss for what to do.