How do you usually dismiss people?

Hello there! I'm a 30/f/straight. So I'm facing an issue for the first time. I ALWAYS have been the one dismissed by guys and now I don't know if I grew confident/interesting/not needy or if I'm picky or if my appearance and personality are more appealing in the country I moved to, but the fact is that I've been out with a few guys lately and nah. I simply didn't felt a connection, even they being attractive and nice. Somehow they do feel a connection, but we have this cultural difference on the signs - over my country, if you don't get a kiss at the first date, is a CLEAR SIGN that a second date won't happen. Or if the conversation starts getting cold and more timed, it might be a minor sign. But not here where I am. So I'm struggling to dismiss these people because I've suffered so much in the past because of rejection that i don't wanna cause the same crappy feeling to a decent person that I simply didn't connected. I always go on ghosting because it's an easy way, but I don't think it's fair or decent solution for a 30 yo person (or is it?). So, what do you people usually do? You just say the truth, you keep inventing excuses to not go out again until the person give up on you, which path do you chose to take? Oh, just an important detail: I usually go out with people from dating apps. Thanks in advance!

Submitted April 24, 2019 at 07:28PM

Hello there! I'm a 30/f/straight. So I'm facing an issue for the first time. I ALWAYS have been the one dismissed by guys and now I don't know if I grew confident/interesting/not needy or if I'm picky or if my appearance and personality are more appealing in the country I moved to, but the fact is that I've been out with a few guys lately and nah. I simply didn't felt a connection, even they being attractive and nice. Somehow they do feel a connection, but we have this cultural difference on the signs - over my country, if you don't get a kiss at the first date, is a CLEAR SIGN that a second date won't happen. Or if the conversation starts getting cold and more timed, it might be a minor sign. But not here where I am. So I'm struggling to dismiss these people because I've suffered so much in the past because of rejection that i don't wanna cause the same crappy feeling to a decent person that I simply didn't connected. I always go on ghosting because it's an easy way, but I don't think it's fair or decent solution for a 30 yo person (or is it?). So, what do you people usually do? You just say the truth, you keep inventing excuses to not go out again until the person give up on you, which path do you chose to take? Oh, just an important detail: I usually go out with people from dating apps. Thanks in advance!