My husband (27M) and I (28F) are having some communication issues and I don't know what to do.
My husband and I have only been married for six months now. I won't lie when I say that things have been very difficult since we've been married. We probably get into some sort of argument every other week. The issue is how we handle it.
I am better at just going to him immediately and saying "lets talk and work this out" or "I'm sorry about what I just said" or whatever. My husband on the other hand, shuts down for days! He will literally just not talk to me (other than the necessary "are you hungry" type questions) because he doesn't want to deal with it.
We've talked before about how whoever is at fault in causing the argument needs to be the one to address it and make sure we don't get stuck in this rut. Only, he NEVER does it! I am always the one to initiate "the talk" and it's exhausting. So the options are: I give in and I keep solving his problems for us, or we don't talk for days. The last time I let it go, we didn't talk for 6 days! it was the worst thing ever. And now this time we are at day 2.
I texted him yesterday while he was at work a long and emotional text explaining how I felt about our fight this time and he sent me part of a response back (because he accidentally hit the send button without being finished) and then never said anything after that. its been 24hours since that text conversation. When we got home from work we said some things in passing but we didn't hang out and have normal time together.
I'm just tired so early on in this marriage and he is stuck in this cycle. He has said multiple times that he will work on it but he has made zero progress. What do I do? Do I keep initiating the conversation and let him off the hook? Am I making this a bigger thing by wanting him to start the conversation when its his fault? I honestly don't know what to do. I need advice!
Edit: My issue with me initiating the conversations all the time is that it makes me feel like he is just okay with us not talking. It makes me start to resent him and it hurts my feelings.
Submitted May 14, 2019 at 04:28PM
My husband and I have only been married for six months now. I won't lie when I say that things have been very difficult since we've been married. We probably get into some sort of argument every other week. The issue is how we handle it.I am better at just going to him immediately and saying "lets talk and work this out" or "I'm sorry about what I just said" or whatever. My husband on the other hand, shuts down for days! He will literally just not talk to me (other than the necessary "are you hungry" type questions) because he doesn't want to deal with it.We've talked before about how whoever is at fault in causing the argument needs to be the one to address it and make sure we don't get stuck in this rut. Only, he NEVER does it! I am always the one to initiate "the talk" and it's exhausting. So the options are: I give in and I keep solving his problems for us, or we don't talk for days. The last time I let it go, we didn't talk for 6 days! it was the worst thing ever. And now this time we are at day 2.I texted him yesterday while he was at work a long and emotional text explaining how I felt about our fight this time and he sent me part of a response back (because he accidentally hit the send button without being finished) and then never said anything after that. its been 24hours since that text conversation. When we got home from work we said some things in passing but we didn't hang out and have normal time together.I'm just tired so early on in this marriage and he is stuck in this cycle. He has said multiple times that he will work on it but he has made zero progress. What do I do? Do I keep initiating the conversation and let him off the hook? Am I making this a bigger thing by wanting him to start the conversation when its his fault? I honestly don't know what to do. I need advice!Edit: My issue with me initiating the conversations all the time is that it makes me feel like he is just okay with us not talking. It makes me start to resent him and it hurts my feelings.
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