Men of reddit, can I ask a question?

Hello, I am a 38yo female, on and off single for a few years. I have been on plenty of dates and am fairly ok in that area. I am independent, and pay all of my bills and debts, have an education and pursuing more education as well.

I was recently told by a guy friend of mine that I am a strong personality - not in a bad way, just I haven’t met anyone who could match me so far.

I was on tinder 2 times. I know what Tinder is for, but I had slight hope that maybe I could at least make some cool friends or something. I am not a one night stand girl, I believe I deserve more as I have already done the whole one night & fwb situations.

Over a year ago, I met a man (about 6 years older than me) and we went on a few dates, the chemistry for me was unreal. Nothing physical happened but a few days After meeting we just stopped speaking, which was fine, I figured we weren’t in the same page. Met a few other men, but nothing serious or with potential.

Then I met a man who is my age and we went out and had a great time and I did sleep with him. We hung out a few more times, then he stopped replying to my messages and that was fine too.

Last week, the first man messaged me out of no where. Asking how I was etc and wanted to get together when he was in town from his work. We have a tentative date set up for next week.

Yesterday, the 2nd man messaged me out of nowhere. Now wants to see me and talk over a meal but then immediately went into trying to get me to sleep with him again. I said no.

Why are these men contacting me again? Out of the blue. Seemed obvious to me that they weren’t interested in pursuing something before.



Submitted May 16, 2019 at 03:13AM

Hello, I am a 38yo female, on and off single for a few years. I have been on plenty of dates and am fairly ok in that area. I am independent, and pay all of my bills and debts, have an education and pursuing more education as well.I was recently told by a guy friend of mine that I am a strong personality - not in a bad way, just I haven’t met anyone who could match me so far.I was on tinder 2 times. I know what Tinder is for, but I had slight hope that maybe I could at least make some cool friends or something. I am not a one night stand girl, I believe I deserve more as I have already done the whole one night & fwb situations.Over a year ago, I met a man (about 6 years older than me) and we went on a few dates, the chemistry for me was unreal. Nothing physical happened but a few days After meeting we just stopped speaking, which was fine, I figured we weren’t in the same page. Met a few other men, but nothing serious or with potential.Then I met a man who is my age and we went out and had a great time and I did sleep with him. We hung out a few more times, then he stopped replying to my messages and that was fine too.Last week, the first man messaged me out of no where. Asking how I was etc and wanted to get together when he was in town from his work. We have a tentative date set up for next week.Yesterday, the 2nd man messaged me out of nowhere. Now wants to see me and talk over a meal but then immediately went into trying to get me to sleep with him again. I said no.Why are these men contacting me again? Out of the blue. Seemed obvious to me that they weren’t interested in pursuing something before.
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