'Where do you live?' Why do men ask this?

Hey folks. I'm a 36 yr old straight female living in a major Canadian metropolis. I've been wading through online dating, and I notice an odd trend where a few men seem really fixated on finding out where I live before asking any questions to get to know me.

This is the first or second question they ask after we "match" online. Usually I give a general answer, but I've noticed they always keep asking "where exactly?" and one guy - when I gave him my main street and said downtown, actually asked "what cross street?" . Is this a thing? I've asked why they want to know (thinking, oh maybe they're trying to set up a date.) but get stonewalled as a response.

I find it intrusive as a woman, because I feel its best to be careful online, especially when you haven't even met someone in person. If I say, I live in for example, midtown Manhattan and off broadway, why keep asking "what cross street?". I also don't get what where someone lives has to do with compatibility so long as you're in the same city. I'm really at a loss as to why this is asked. Any one have ideas on why they would really want to know where a woman lived before asking anything else about her?



Submitted April 11, 2019 at 09:15PM

Hey folks. I'm a 36 yr old straight female living in a major Canadian metropolis. I've been wading through online dating, and I notice an odd trend where a few men seem really fixated on finding out where I live before asking any questions to get to know me.This is the first or second question they ask after we "match" online. Usually I give a general answer, but I've noticed they always keep asking "where exactly?" and one guy - when I gave him my main street and said downtown, actually asked "what cross street?" . Is this a thing? I've asked why they want to know (thinking, oh maybe they're trying to set up a date.) but get stonewalled as a response.I find it intrusive as a woman, because I feel its best to be careful online, especially when you haven't even met someone in person. If I say, I live in for example, midtown Manhattan and off broadway, why keep asking "what cross street?". I also don't get what where someone lives has to do with compatibility so long as you're in the same city. I'm really at a loss as to why this is asked. Any one have ideas on why they would really want to know where a woman lived before asking anything else about her?
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