To the father of my son and the man that I will one day marry!

First off I just wanna say ik you will probably never see this but I need to put this into words somewhere so here it is!

So we met way back on November 9th, 2019 at a bar of all places lol... I remember your beer and sitting in your lap drunk pressed against your gun and even tho I dont remember everything that was said I'll never forget your blue eyes and looking back I wish I would have let you take me home ik you just wanted me to get home safe ....

Fast forward to that Sunday I knew I absolutely needed to see you again..... but one thing I dont think you realized at the time even tho that night as we lied in bed together in each others arms so drunk I was emotional thinking of how broken I was and a mess and just got out of an engagement 3 months prior and still hurting and i told you and as tears ran down my face you looked at me with those big blue eyes and said you didn't care that i was a mess or any of the other things i said that night but that you wanted me i think you just knew from that moment i was your one ... and i was hooked on the way we fit together so perfectly and you would slide your hand down my back as you pulled me so close and you would always so "absolutely" to everything because you just knew absolutely knew even then... I think a part of me knew as well but I was fucking terrified ! If it wasn't for your friends I probably wouldnt have stayed I didn't feel like I deserved you.. this love that wrapped around me and all the million pieces you found me in..... but I'm so happy I did because every night you wanted me there to the point I just never left and each night I couldn't help but in the moment start to feel happy .. I didn't need the weed or the drugs to feel high you were it and as time went on this love that wrapped around me started to form the glue that was sticking the pieces back together!

Now fast forward to January 2 2018 it had been a week and a half already since I missed my period and I just knew I was pregnant and terrified that this was it .... and as I saw the words pregnant pop up on the screen I couldn't even bring myself to tell you in person but I had to send a pic and yk what you said it's ok babe you knew we'd be ok and it was... and yk what our son ended up being a blessing in disguise he changed our whole life and honestly there was never a moment I felt alone or had to face anything by myself ! And in the end i gained 3 things our son, and amazing new family, and this new self that I couldn't be more proud of !

There are a lot of people that want finished projects, basically excepting perfection or damn near it out of there partners ... which I dont understand because we all have problems and issues some just are way better at hiding them... and yk they say that true love meets you in your mess and that was true this amazing blue eyed red haired man met this woman who was a mess and falling a part and emotionally unavailable and all he saw was her smile that lite up the room and the way her eyes looked all the way through him when she saw him and the little weird quirks and habits she had formed over the years and fell in love with the light he saw hidden behind all the ways she had spent years building up ! And he never once tried to fix her he just loved her instead and that's really all she needed to start to heal ! And honestly I couldn't be more grateful for this amazing man he is everything good in my life and I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with him and expand our little family ❤

Submitted May 26, 2019 at 10:51PM

First off I just wanna say ik you will probably never see this but I need to put this into words somewhere so here it is!So we met way back on November 9th, 2019 at a bar of all places lol... I remember your beer and sitting in your lap drunk pressed against your gun and even tho I dont remember everything that was said I'll never forget your blue eyes and looking back I wish I would have let you take me home ik you just wanted me to get home safe ....Fast forward to that Sunday I knew I absolutely needed to see you again..... but one thing I dont think you realized at the time even tho that night as we lied in bed together in each others arms so drunk I was emotional thinking of how broken I was and a mess and just got out of an engagement 3 months prior and still hurting and i told you and as tears ran down my face you looked at me with those big blue eyes and said you didn't care that i was a mess or any of the other things i said that night but that you wanted me i think you just knew from that moment i was your one ... and i was hooked on the way we fit together so perfectly and you would slide your hand down my back as you pulled me so close and you would always so "absolutely" to everything because you just knew absolutely knew even then... I think a part of me knew as well but I was fucking terrified ! If it wasn't for your friends I probably wouldnt have stayed I didn't feel like I deserved you.. this love that wrapped around me and all the million pieces you found me in..... but I'm so happy I did because every night you wanted me there to the point I just never left and each night I couldn't help but in the moment start to feel happy .. I didn't need the weed or the drugs to feel high you were it and as time went on this love that wrapped around me started to form the glue that was sticking the pieces back together!Now fast forward to January 2 2018 it had been a week and a half already since I missed my period and I just knew I was pregnant and terrified that this was it .... and as I saw the words pregnant pop up on the screen I couldn't even bring myself to tell you in person but I had to send a pic and yk what you said it's ok babe you knew we'd be ok and it was... and yk what our son ended up being a blessing in disguise he changed our whole life and honestly there was never a moment I felt alone or had to face anything by myself ! And in the end i gained 3 things our son, and amazing new family, and this new self that I couldn't be more proud of !There are a lot of people that want finished projects, basically excepting perfection or damn near it out of there partners ... which I dont understand because we all have problems and issues some just are way better at hiding them... and yk they say that true love meets you in your mess and that was true this amazing blue eyed red haired man met this woman who was a mess and falling a part and emotionally unavailable and all he saw was her smile that lite up the room and the way her eyes looked all the way through him when she saw him and the little weird quirks and habits she had formed over the years and fell in love with the light he saw hidden behind all the ways she had spent years building up ! And he never once tried to fix her he just loved her instead and that's really all she needed to start to heal ! And honestly I couldn't be more grateful for this amazing man he is everything good in my life and I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with him and expand our little family ❤