(Are rants allowed here ?) Thoughts and ideas about relationships from someone you'd probably find horrendous

I usually approach this question and these topics with great diplomacy, but I'm feeling angry and I wrote this in a saddened state of mind, so please don't take it on you. If I were approaching this as a debate and not a rant, I would have expressed myself a lot differently, but rants are not about convincing. Hell, I don't even know if this subreddit allows it, I don't know where to express myself and It's starting to really build up.

I have observed and experienced throughout my life (22 y/o) the growth of several ideas. That relationships have to be temporary, that the concept of "love for life" is repressive and frowned upon, that sexuality comes before love, that people should always put their own interests first, that you need to "leave people and let them work their problems out" instead of caring enough to really help them work it through.

I keep seeing those ideas drilling through so many relationships everywhere I turn to look, it makes me feel enraged and philosophically alone.

It seems to me like this is an amalgamation of terrible ideas, linked to a fear of commitment and responsibility, aswell as an excessive encouragement to put self-sufficiency, pleasure, desire and "freedom" as the paramount value on which you should base your behaviors, and I am deeply convinced that this is the basis on which an outstanding amount of emotional and human misery is built. We struggle to balance ideas of progress and the reality of our feelings, emotions, hopes, frustrations and conflicted desires.

Love and relationships are absurdly powerful and incredibly important in the lives of almost anyone, they shape the way we see and experience the world, and I truly believe that we are making terrible mistakes in the way we approach them, and the way we try to make them evolve in our culture. Untrustworthy and brittle relationships don't make for happy people, and unhappy people doesn't make for a healthy society.

I might not have expressed myself correctly, and I definitely am not being exhaustive in the way I feel about this, I'm just ranting and I don't even know what I'm excepting of this post.

The worst thing is, these are not fatalities, these are choices and ideas we decide to put forth. It makes me feel sad to see so much misery coming from this, and I don't see my ideas carried anywhere by anyone, and it makes me feel alone for some reason.

Maybe I'm getting some things wrong, but I'm not turning a blind eye to the world an imagining things, these are rock hard concrete and consistent things I see. And again, maybe I'm wrong, but I can never have a discussion about those things with anyone, people get offended over this shit and never bring up what they actually think or slightly discuss the ideas I'm trying to put on the table.

Whatever, have a good day, take care of yourself, I hope your love flourishes into something beautiful.



Submitted May 26, 2019 at 12:20PM

I usually approach this question and these topics with great diplomacy, but I'm feeling angry and I wrote this in a saddened state of mind, so please don't take it on you. If I were approaching this as a debate and not a rant, I would have expressed myself a lot differently, but rants are not about convincing. Hell, I don't even know if this subreddit allows it, I don't know where to express myself and It's starting to really build up.​I have observed and experienced throughout my life (22 y/o) the growth of several ideas. That relationships have to be temporary, that the concept of "love for life" is repressive and frowned upon, that sexuality comes before love, that people should always put their own interests first, that you need to "leave people and let them work their problems out" instead of caring enough to really help them work it through.​I keep seeing those ideas drilling through so many relationships everywhere I turn to look, it makes me feel enraged and philosophically alone.​It seems to me like this is an amalgamation of terrible ideas, linked to a fear of commitment and responsibility, aswell as an excessive encouragement to put self-sufficiency, pleasure, desire and "freedom" as the paramount value on which you should base your behaviors, and I am deeply convinced that this is the basis on which an outstanding amount of emotional and human misery is built. We struggle to balance ideas of progress and the reality of our feelings, emotions, hopes, frustrations and conflicted desires.​Love and relationships are absurdly powerful and incredibly important in the lives of almost anyone, they shape the way we see and experience the world, and I truly believe that we are making terrible mistakes in the way we approach them, and the way we try to make them evolve in our culture. Untrustworthy and brittle relationships don't make for happy people, and unhappy people doesn't make for a healthy society.​I might not have expressed myself correctly, and I definitely am not being exhaustive in the way I feel about this, I'm just ranting and I don't even know what I'm excepting of this post.​The worst thing is, these are not fatalities, these are choices and ideas we decide to put forth. It makes me feel sad to see so much misery coming from this, and I don't see my ideas carried anywhere by anyone, and it makes me feel alone for some reason.​Maybe I'm getting some things wrong, but I'm not turning a blind eye to the world an imagining things, these are rock hard concrete and consistent things I see. And again, maybe I'm wrong, but I can never have a discussion about those things with anyone, people get offended over this shit and never bring up what they actually think or slightly discuss the ideas I'm trying to put on the table.​Whatever, have a good day, take care of yourself, I hope your love flourishes into something beautiful.

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