Are my beliefs about sex keeping me from finding the right guy?

I am a 20 year old girl and still a virgin. I wasn't ever religious and now I am an atheist and was raised in a semi progressive environment as my family isn't strict. I live in India and the culture here has been pretty harsh on me. I have been shamed for the kind of clothes that I wear (I wear a lot of non revealing clothes btw as a choice). I used to rebel as a teen and didn't really have a lot of friends because of that (I mean supporting gay marriage and being an atheist). I am kind of a centrist politically which makes me even more prone to judgement from both sides. So I had a bf when I was 15-18 and we used to kiss (only that) and talk about sex a lot (we never had it). We broke up and it got me wondering whether I should wait till I am married to have sex as I was almost ready to do it with him. I figured waiting till I am married will filter out the guys who would just want me for my body and I can't bear the thought of being used like that. It's very degrading to me. That's why I decided to wait. Plus I strongly believe that it's right for me as I believe that dating and marriage should be a certain way. You first date and find out if you like the person and then you talk about sexual prefrences and all before you get married to make sure you are not completely incompatible. My question here is that is this usually going to turn off the guys who would want to date me? I am curious.



Submitted April 06, 2019 at 06:58AM

I am a 20 year old girl and still a virgin. I wasn't ever religious and now I am an atheist and was raised in a semi progressive environment as my family isn't strict. I live in India and the culture here has been pretty harsh on me. I have been shamed for the kind of clothes that I wear (I wear a lot of non revealing clothes btw as a choice). I used to rebel as a teen and didn't really have a lot of friends because of that (I mean supporting gay marriage and being an atheist). I am kind of a centrist politically which makes me even more prone to judgement from both sides. So I had a bf when I was 15-18 and we used to kiss (only that) and talk about sex a lot (we never had it). We broke up and it got me wondering whether I should wait till I am married to have sex as I was almost ready to do it with him. I figured waiting till I am married will filter out the guys who would just want me for my body and I can't bear the thought of being used like that. It's very degrading to me. That's why I decided to wait. Plus I strongly believe that it's right for me as I believe that dating and marriage should be a certain way. You first date and find out if you like the person and then you talk about sexual prefrences and all before you get married to make sure you are not completely incompatible. My question here is that is this usually going to turn off the guys who would want to date me? I am curious.
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