Trying to not be overcome with anxieties

I've noticed other people on here posting similar feelings and it helps me realize I'm not alone.

I've started liking a guy I've seen 4 times now. I don't have the most open schedule due to shared custody and he is also pretty busy. We text daily and after our last date, which involved making out (still taking it slow) I told him I'd like to see him again and he agreed.

Then things got busy on his end and it's been a bit over a week. We text daily and hes indicated he does want to see me again. But I started stressing. And my mind instantly went to the whole busy as a way to slowly avoid things etc. Also some of the flirting we've been doing felt awkward so I started questioning things. He assured me he wants to see me when things settle down so I reached out to see if we could plan for later this weekend etc and was told maybe near the end of next week.

That felt crappy and it triggered my anxiety. I've been working on it and self talk and soothing. But I'm also dealing with the end of a marriage (not super recent but still hurts) and while I am ready to date and love the feeling this guy gives me, I'm still cautious and don't like guessing. So I did reach out and said I wasn't sure if he did want a date or was legit busy. I made it in neutral tone and figured it's a good way to find out. I've had guys do that to me before so I realise it's a thing and he answered that he was legit busy and laughed it off.

So now I feel bad. Should I worry I've offended him? I did apologize and we joked a bit back and forth and we are back to texting since he got off work.

How do others deal with this? I feel I'm too stuck thinking negative. He's been really nice and on the ball with reaching out and texting and I figured at this point he must just be too busy and I'm fine to wait.

Ack sorry Reddit. I've just been a little stressed today and I keep worrying I will mess things up with him..which I guess is a dwof fulfilling prophecy lol?



Submitted May 18, 2019 at 12:25AM

I've noticed other people on here posting similar feelings and it helps me realize I'm not alone.I've started liking a guy I've seen 4 times now. I don't have the most open schedule due to shared custody and he is also pretty busy. We text daily and after our last date, which involved making out (still taking it slow) I told him I'd like to see him again and he agreed.Then things got busy on his end and it's been a bit over a week. We text daily and hes indicated he does want to see me again. But I started stressing. And my mind instantly went to the whole busy as a way to slowly avoid things etc. Also some of the flirting we've been doing felt awkward so I started questioning things. He assured me he wants to see me when things settle down so I reached out to see if we could plan for later this weekend etc and was told maybe near the end of next week.That felt crappy and it triggered my anxiety. I've been working on it and self talk and soothing. But I'm also dealing with the end of a marriage (not super recent but still hurts) and while I am ready to date and love the feeling this guy gives me, I'm still cautious and don't like guessing. So I did reach out and said I wasn't sure if he did want a date or was legit busy. I made it in neutral tone and figured it's a good way to find out. I've had guys do that to me before so I realise it's a thing and he answered that he was legit busy and laughed it off.So now I feel bad. Should I worry I've offended him? I did apologize and we joked a bit back and forth and we are back to texting since he got off work.How do others deal with this? I feel I'm too stuck thinking negative. He's been really nice and on the ball with reaching out and texting and I figured at this point he must just be too busy and I'm fine to wait.Ack sorry Reddit. I've just been a little stressed today and I keep worrying I will mess things up with him..which I guess is a dwof fulfilling prophecy lol?
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