Text breakup followed by radio silence.... why would someone do that?

So I (33F) was in a relationship with a man (39M) for the last three months. The first two months he treated me perfectly, he introduced me to his friends, we became boyfriend and girlfriend, we said I love you, he invited me on an international vacation. Then a close relative got sick (his aunt who is kind of like his mom). I tried to be supportive and be there for him but he withdrew and started acting really funny. We got into a conversation (not a fight) about an issue we disagreed about (guns) and he ignored me for a week. At the end of the week he said he was trying to break up with me but he missed me and he decided the gun thing wasn't a dealbreaker. So I took him back, but I was having trouble getting over it. We had fun when we were together but we live an hour apart and in the days between us seeing each other we didn't talk enough. I eventually told him I know his aunt is sick but I need more time and attention. He broke up with me on the phone. We got together to talk and ended up getting back together. We had another nice weekend but the lack of communication continued, he kept bailing, he kept not having time to talk. I said I was upset one day after he bailed on me and didn't have time to call. So he broke up with me by text, one text message that said that he didn't have time for a girlfriend and he was sorry. And then he completely disappears... like no texts no calls... nothing. I call a few times over the next few days but he has gone completely dark. Obviously I stopped contacting him but I am having trouble processing what happened. Is that a normal way for someone to end a serious relationship? I feel so disrespected and confused. There was no other woman, I didn't really do anything mean or wrong so I really can't understand why this happened. (The WAY he broke up with me, not the fact that we broke up) I would never, ever do something like that to someone else so I am struggling to see the logic in what he did and am struggling to move past this. Is there anyone who understands why someone would break up a serious relationship by text and then just go dark?



Submitted April 09, 2019 at 04:20AM

So I (33F) was in a relationship with a man (39M) for the last three months. The first two months he treated me perfectly, he introduced me to his friends, we became boyfriend and girlfriend, we said I love you, he invited me on an international vacation. Then a close relative got sick (his aunt who is kind of like his mom). I tried to be supportive and be there for him but he withdrew and started acting really funny. We got into a conversation (not a fight) about an issue we disagreed about (guns) and he ignored me for a week. At the end of the week he said he was trying to break up with me but he missed me and he decided the gun thing wasn't a dealbreaker. So I took him back, but I was having trouble getting over it. We had fun when we were together but we live an hour apart and in the days between us seeing each other we didn't talk enough. I eventually told him I know his aunt is sick but I need more time and attention. He broke up with me on the phone. We got together to talk and ended up getting back together. We had another nice weekend but the lack of communication continued, he kept bailing, he kept not having time to talk. I said I was upset one day after he bailed on me and didn't have time to call. So he broke up with me by text, one text message that said that he didn't have time for a girlfriend and he was sorry. And then he completely disappears... like no texts no calls... nothing. I call a few times over the next few days but he has gone completely dark. Obviously I stopped contacting him but I am having trouble processing what happened. Is that a normal way for someone to end a serious relationship? I feel so disrespected and confused. There was no other woman, I didn't really do anything mean or wrong so I really can't understand why this happened. (The WAY he broke up with me, not the fact that we broke up) I would never, ever do something like that to someone else so I am struggling to see the logic in what he did and am struggling to move past this. Is there anyone who understands why someone would break up a serious relationship by text and then just go dark?
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