Ex (27m) is making it hard to get my (23f) belongings back

My ex and I were together almost 4 years. This entire relationship he has been extremely immature and lazy and as time went on I couldn’t do it anymore. We have a child (1.5 yrs) together as well. The break up really wasn’t much of a surprise and mutual in the beginning.

Now it’s been 2 months since it happened and he’s more bitter about it now than he was then. I moved out and we now split time with our son 50/50. My name is still on the lease currently and I told him I would drop it from it once I had my belongings back. He says I can have them when he has a place to put everything and replace them. I furnished the entire apartment and made it a home. I don’t know if this matters but all of the utilities are also in my name still and I’m working to get them switched over once this month is paid off.

The last 2 months he has consistently and at random called me names and keeps tabs on my every move. He is acting unstable and jealous and he’s playing the victim to any and everyone. I moved in with my mom to get ahead financially before getting a new place. I haven’t got my things yet because a part of me cares and I would hate to leave someone with nothing seeing as it’s all mine and he knows that. He calls me petty for wanting my things back as well.

Eventually I will need these things to furnish my future home (cups, plates, silverware, entertainment stand, etc.) but I know I’m not in desperate need of them right now. My son also lives with him part of the time. But as time keeps going I want my stuff back ASAP. I want all ties that don’t have to do with our son completely cut. The thought of someone using the things I spent my money on while calling me awful things weekly is really making me not care anymore. The only thing holding me back is my son being there and having nothing too. I guess I’m curious on how you would go about this? At this point he’s going to freak out regardless.

TL;DR: left a 4 year relationship and my ex is making me feel bad for wanting my things back that I’ve given him 2 months to replace



Submitted November 02, 2019 at 11:31PM

My ex and I were together almost 4 years. This entire relationship he has been extremely immature and lazy and as time went on I couldn’t do it anymore. We have a child (1.5 yrs) together as well. The break up really wasn’t much of a surprise and mutual in the beginning.Now it’s been 2 months since it happened and he’s more bitter about it now than he was then. I moved out and we now split time with our son 50/50. My name is still on the lease currently and I told him I would drop it from it once I had my belongings back. He says I can have them when he has a place to put everything and replace them. I furnished the entire apartment and made it a home. I don’t know if this matters but all of the utilities are also in my name still and I’m working to get them switched over once this month is paid off.The last 2 months he has consistently and at random called me names and keeps tabs on my every move. He is acting unstable and jealous and he’s playing the victim to any and everyone. I moved in with my mom to get ahead financially before getting a new place. I haven’t got my things yet because a part of me cares and I would hate to leave someone with nothing seeing as it’s all mine and he knows that. He calls me petty for wanting my things back as well.Eventually I will need these things to furnish my future home (cups, plates, silverware, entertainment stand, etc.) but I know I’m not in desperate need of them right now. My son also lives with him part of the time. But as time keeps going I want my stuff back ASAP. I want all ties that don’t have to do with our son completely cut. The thought of someone using the things I spent my money on while calling me awful things weekly is really making me not care anymore. The only thing holding me back is my son being there and having nothing too. I guess I’m curious on how you would go about this? At this point he’s going to freak out regardless.TL;DR: left a 4 year relationship and my ex is making me feel bad for wanting my things back that I’ve given him 2 months to replace
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