My boyfriend[22M]s excuse to not go on dates is that “he has too many bills”. Should I wait for him or leave ?

I’ve been dating this guy for a year and 8 months. It’s been rocky on my end, he’s my first boyfriend so sometimes i find myself questioning if the things that happen between us are normal.

He lives with his mum and brother, has barely any friends because when he was bullied during school, his mum kept him at home for many years. She did the same to his younger brother.

He has many bills, some are “normal” like car insurance or wifi for his room. But others are tv payment for a BRAND NEW tv, payments for a BRAND NEW custom made PC monitor, an electricians course that he gave up on but still pays for, payments for his BRAND NEW iPhone etc

I’m not a shallow person who only cares about money. I do love our nights just staying in and watching a film but if we go on dates, i pay for them. A cinema ticket is £4.99, so he can easily afford a cinema date.

He says that once he has sorted his money problems, everything will be alright...

I have been banking on that for a long while now but I want more. I want to be going on mini breaks with him where I don’t pay for everything but we go halves... just going to the cinema would be great

Even to McDonalds...

We always just stay in him mums house or go food shopping for his family.

He gets lots of finance contracts and complains that he’s broke. Surely it’s his fault ? Plus he can definitely afford£10 for a cinema date, is he just refusing to ?

What would you do in my situation ?

TLDR boyfriend is in a bad financial situation that he put himself in, and now is telling me to wait for it to be over for him to then be a proper boyfriend to me (many years or “until i win the lottery”)

EDIT I’m 20! Sorry, I forgot to put that in the title.

EDIT2. We do love each other, but i’m really wondering if i’m settling



Submitted October 14, 2019 at 11:33PM

I’ve been dating this guy for a year and 8 months. It’s been rocky on my end, he’s my first boyfriend so sometimes i find myself questioning if the things that happen between us are normal.He lives with his mum and brother, has barely any friends because when he was bullied during school, his mum kept him at home for many years. She did the same to his younger brother.He has many bills, some are “normal” like car insurance or wifi for his room. But others are tv payment for a BRAND NEW tv, payments for a BRAND NEW custom made PC monitor, an electricians course that he gave up on but still pays for, payments for his BRAND NEW iPhone etcI’m not a shallow person who only cares about money. I do love our nights just staying in and watching a film but if we go on dates, i pay for them. A cinema ticket is £4.99, so he can easily afford a cinema date.He says that once he has sorted his money problems, everything will be alright...I have been banking on that for a long while now but I want more. I want to be going on mini breaks with him where I don’t pay for everything but we go halves... just going to the cinema would be greatEven to McDonalds...We always just stay in him mums house or go food shopping for his family.He gets lots of finance contracts and complains that he’s broke. Surely it’s his fault ? Plus he can definitely afford£10 for a cinema date, is he just refusing to ?What would you do in my situation ?TLDR boyfriend is in a bad financial situation that he put himself in, and now is telling me to wait for it to be over for him to then be a proper boyfriend to me (many years or “until i win the lottery”)EDIT I’m 20! Sorry, I forgot to put that in the title.EDIT2. We do love each other, but i’m really wondering if i’m settling
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