Why Asian men face special burdens in the dating scene

As a firstborn Asian son, I've been trying to figure out my entire life why I see so many more white male/Asian female couples and so few Asian male/white female couples, and, more importantly, why Asian parents seem so much more comfortable with WMAF couples. I've also been trying to figure out why Asian sons in particular are so discouraged from dating and learning basic attraction/romantic interactions with young women. I always assumed it had something to do with arranged marriages and how traditional Asian men don't learn how to attract and date in the Western sense because a wife is arranged for them, but the true answer is all of these phenomena are results of Confucianism itself.

Confucianism places a burden on Asian sons, particularly firstborn Asian sons, to take care of the parents. Parents shelter their firstborn sons because their firstborn sons are completely and totally responsible for their retirement, passing on the family name/resources/traditions/culture/business, and taking care of anything and everything the parents want. To be an obedient firstborn Asian son is EVERYTHING. To be disobedient is to bring shame not only to yourself, not only to your family, but to uncountable generations of your ancestors who sacrificed everything to give you the spoiled, easy life you enjoy in the West.

The end result is good Asian sons do not learn to date. It is culturally assumed that an obedient Asian wife will be arranged for him when it is time, if he has accrued a high enough social status. Good Asian sons never hit on women, learn to flirt with them (Why would you need to know that? It's a useless skill for playboys and bad men), or attract them. And Asian sons are subtly discouraged from pursuing non-Asian women who do not share our Confucian values. Meanwhile, Asian women are free to be pursued by non-Asian men, because they do not carry on the family name. Even better if they marry a white man, the most prestigious of the races.

It's all incredibly fucked-up. But Confucianism explains everything about why Asian men have no game, Asian men are less likely to have non-Asian partners than Asian women, and why we are particularly frustrated and discouraged in the Western dating scene.

Fantastic explanation here: https://www.reddit.com/r/amwf/comments/ehsww5/asian_parents_want_their_sons_to_marry_asian_but/fcovrr1/



Submitted January 01, 2020 at 11:28PM

As a firstborn Asian son, I've been trying to figure out my entire life why I see so many more white male/Asian female couples and so few Asian male/white female couples, and, more importantly, why Asian parents seem so much more comfortable with WMAF couples. I've also been trying to figure out why Asian sons in particular are so discouraged from dating and learning basic attraction/romantic interactions with young women. I always assumed it had something to do with arranged marriages and how traditional Asian men don't learn how to attract and date in the Western sense because a wife is arranged for them, but the true answer is all of these phenomena are results of Confucianism itself.Confucianism places a burden on Asian sons, particularly firstborn Asian sons, to take care of the parents. Parents shelter their firstborn sons because their firstborn sons are completely and totally responsible for their retirement, passing on the family name/resources/traditions/culture/business, and taking care of anything and everything the parents want. To be an obedient firstborn Asian son is EVERYTHING. To be disobedient is to bring shame not only to yourself, not only to your family, but to uncountable generations of your ancestors who sacrificed everything to give you the spoiled, easy life you enjoy in the West.The end result is good Asian sons do not learn to date. It is culturally assumed that an obedient Asian wife will be arranged for him when it is time, if he has accrued a high enough social status. Good Asian sons never hit on women, learn to flirt with them (Why would you need to know that? It's a useless skill for playboys and bad men), or attract them. And Asian sons are subtly discouraged from pursuing non-Asian women who do not share our Confucian values. Meanwhile, Asian women are free to be pursued by non-Asian men, because they do not carry on the family name. Even better if they marry a white man, the most prestigious of the races.It's all incredibly fucked-up. But Confucianism explains everything about why Asian men have no game, Asian men are less likely to have non-Asian partners than Asian women, and why we are particularly frustrated and discouraged in the Western dating scene.Fantastic explanation here: https://ift.tt/2QhKFMs
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