Am I an asshole for not liking him?

I'm dating a guy who is very nice, but the more we hang out, the more I start to realize I'm not into him. So obviously it's not a match here, but I feel the reasons why I dont like him are bad. Here are the reasons clear cut.

Hes never been in a relationship and therefore always needs me to tell him what to do or how something works. (I just got out of a relationship with person that hadn't been in a relationship before and didnt know what he wanted. It created confusion as hed change his mind about big stuff once he realized what he liked or didnt like)

Hes also inexperienced in life in general, doesn't know where to go or what to. I feel like I have to hold his hand through everything. Where to go when going to a new place, deciding what to eat. Making all the decisions for every little thing is draining and so Is holding someone's hand.

Hes a pothead. I dont dislike pot, it's just not for me, and I generally dont care if someone smokes but everyday its pot and video games. I like to be spontaneous here and there if I get a few days off work. I dont find "sorry I'm high rn" everyday attractive.

He lives with his sister after being kicked out of his parents house. This only bothers me because he really only prioritizes pot and video games. And hes 29 years old.

Does this make me superficial? I'm not the type of person to ask for change in another's personality. And I've never dated a guy that I decided I'm really not into. I'm just feel more turned off every time he stares at me with the "deer in the headlights" look any times it comes to making a decision. Any. Kind. Of. Decision.



Submitted April 27, 2020 at 12:14AM

I'm dating a guy who is very nice, but the more we hang out, the more I start to realize I'm not into him. So obviously it's not a match here, but I feel the reasons why I dont like him are bad. Here are the reasons clear cut.Hes never been in a relationship and therefore always needs me to tell him what to do or how something works. (I just got out of a relationship with person that hadn't been in a relationship before and didnt know what he wanted. It created confusion as hed change his mind about big stuff once he realized what he liked or didnt like)Hes also inexperienced in life in general, doesn't know where to go or what to. I feel like I have to hold his hand through everything. Where to go when going to a new place, deciding what to eat. Making all the decisions for every little thing is draining and so Is holding someone's hand.Hes a pothead. I dont dislike pot, it's just not for me, and I generally dont care if someone smokes but everyday its pot and video games. I like to be spontaneous here and there if I get a few days off work. I dont find "sorry I'm high rn" everyday attractive.He lives with his sister after being kicked out of his parents house. This only bothers me because he really only prioritizes pot and video games. And hes 29 years old.Does this make me superficial? I'm not the type of person to ask for change in another's personality. And I've never dated a guy that I decided I'm really not into. I'm just feel more turned off every time he stares at me with the "deer in the headlights" look any times it comes to making a decision. Any. Kind. Of. Decision.
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