How do I deal with it ?

How do you deal with this ?

Yo guys, I’m male, 21 y.o. This must be pretty common, but since I haven’t found any answer to this yet, I still wanna ask you about this one. So okay, let’s do it. So I’m dating this girl for 2 years now (she is 20), and I must say she is pretty much what I was looking for. But there is one thing that is bothering me, and I cannot let it go, her fucking EX. You see, I’m that kind of a guy that is very serious about relationships and I never had sex with a girl when I wasn’t sure she is the one for me. With this one however I felt different, felt like things might work out, and they pretty much did, so after half a year of dating I decided that we can actually make it happen. I was a virgin at a time, and of course I had to fucking ask (still regret asking) if she had any sexual partners before. Well she did. Just one. I know, that having sex is normal, but this annoying thought that I had waited and she didn’t is bothering me since then. What makes me feel even worse is that her previous relationship was very abusive, and I know this not only from her, but also from her brothers and her friends (I’m close friend of her brothers, just so you know), and yet she let that guy fuck her in theirs last month of relationship. This whole situation just makes me feel like an idiot for waiting so long, and sometimes I cannot help myself when thinking about it. Should I speak to her about this ? Am I an idiot for waiting so long ? If someone had/having similar situation, how do you deal/dealt with it ? I’m really confused about my feelings, and as I said before, sometimes I just cannot help myself. Sometimes I even think that it would be better to broke up, just so I can finally stop felling like an idiot for my morals, and don’t have to worry about this with my future partners. So please, if someone has some advice to give - drop it. Thanks.

TLDR, I was always withholding about sex, just to have it with the right person, and for some reason expected that person to have the same mindset about this, and of course she didn’t. How do I stop feel like and idiot for waiting so long ? And how do I stop blaming her for not waiting ?



Submitted March 30, 2020 at 12:05AM

How do you deal with this ?Yo guys, I’m male, 21 y.o. This must be pretty common, but since I haven’t found any answer to this yet, I still wanna ask you about this one. So okay, let’s do it. So I’m dating this girl for 2 years now (she is 20), and I must say she is pretty much what I was looking for. But there is one thing that is bothering me, and I cannot let it go, her fucking EX. You see, I’m that kind of a guy that is very serious about relationships and I never had sex with a girl when I wasn’t sure she is the one for me. With this one however I felt different, felt like things might work out, and they pretty much did, so after half a year of dating I decided that we can actually make it happen. I was a virgin at a time, and of course I had to fucking ask (still regret asking) if she had any sexual partners before. Well she did. Just one. I know, that having sex is normal, but this annoying thought that I had waited and she didn’t is bothering me since then. What makes me feel even worse is that her previous relationship was very abusive, and I know this not only from her, but also from her brothers and her friends (I’m close friend of her brothers, just so you know), and yet she let that guy fuck her in theirs last month of relationship. This whole situation just makes me feel like an idiot for waiting so long, and sometimes I cannot help myself when thinking about it. Should I speak to her about this ? Am I an idiot for waiting so long ? If someone had/having similar situation, how do you deal/dealt with it ? I’m really confused about my feelings, and as I said before, sometimes I just cannot help myself. Sometimes I even think that it would be better to broke up, just so I can finally stop felling like an idiot for my morals, and don’t have to worry about this with my future partners. So please, if someone has some advice to give - drop it. Thanks.TLDR, I was always withholding about sex, just to have it with the right person, and for some reason expected that person to have the same mindset about this, and of course she didn’t. How do I stop feel like and idiot for waiting so long ? And how do I stop blaming her for not waiting ?
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Add Comments, Posts, Links... etc.

Popular posts from this blog

The difference between being right and being understood

My boyfriend and I are 28. We’ve been together for about 1.5 years and recently moved in together. He’s a pretty patient and easygoing person (Type B) whereas I’m more particular (Type A). Of course there are two sides to every trait, and my Type A nature benefits us in some ways too. Like all couples, we have differences in perspective or preference. When this happens, he will usually say something like “I disagree (with your perspective) but fine.” I tend to push the issue in an attempt to get him to understand where I’m coming from. This escalates the disagreement into a fight because he perceives it as me trying to be “right”. I truly just want to be understood (and I want to understand where he’s coming from) so I’m looking for more of a dialogue whereas he avoids conflict and just wants it to be over as quickly as possible. His general approach is “agree to disagree” but that doesn’t make sense to me when it’s an issue that will keep coming up and requires compromise. I’m n
Read more

My (27f) gf (27f) is getting tired of me not sharing intimate/ personal info about me

I’ve always been extremely private and introverted. We have more than a year together and we’ve been living together for like 6 months, we get along pretty good and I’m really in love with her, however I can not seem to open up... and I can tell it’s frustrating to her by the way she tells me it bothers her that she feels she’s the only one committed and the one that’s always sharing... At this point I don’t even know if it is that I’ve gotten too used to it, to the point I’ve became lazy to talk about myself or give any genuine personal opinion... it sucks, really, I need to communicate better... Where do I start? Tl;dr: I can’t be completely intimate with my gf and its frustrating her, I need to communicate better because I really love her... where to start? Submitted April 25, 2019 at 06:02AM I’ve always been extremely private and introverted. We have more than a year together and we’ve been living together for like 6 months, we get along pretty good and I’m really in love
Read more

My (23M) girlfriend (25F) relationship is confusing to me. I might be the problem, or maybe we are just incompatible.

I met my girlfriend after a few serious breakups that led me to change both intentionally and unintentionally over a few years. For better and for worse. She had just gotten out of an engagement with a verbally and physically abusive man who had a cocaine problem. We have been together about 8 months now. We hit it off and spent a lot of time together but she began to push our relationship as if there were a time clock for milestones. I was pressed beyond my comfort zone and went with it because of my affection for her. My living situation fell apart and I lost a few thousand dollars to shit roommates right around the time she and I met and she offered to let me stay with her. I agreed with some resistance. I pay for food, help her with bills, and throw money toward rent while trying to get back on my feet. As long as we have been together she has gotten more possessive, angry, and irrational. She is dealing with shit from her engagement and I feel shes looking for a level of seriou
Read more