How do I deal with it ?

How do you deal with this ?

Yo guys, I’m male, 21 y.o. This must be pretty common, but since I haven’t found any answer to this yet, I still wanna ask you about this one. So okay, let’s do it. So I’m dating this girl for 2 years now (she is 20), and I must say she is pretty much what I was looking for. But there is one thing that is bothering me, and I cannot let it go, her fucking EX. You see, I’m that kind of a guy that is very serious about relationships and I never had sex with a girl when I wasn’t sure she is the one for me. With this one however I felt different, felt like things might work out, and they pretty much did, so after half a year of dating I decided that we can actually make it happen. I was a virgin at a time, and of course I had to fucking ask (still regret asking) if she had any sexual partners before. Well she did. Just one. I know, that having sex is normal, but this annoying thought that I had waited and she didn’t is bothering me since then. What makes me feel even worse is that her previous relationship was very abusive, and I know this not only from her, but also from her brothers and her friends (I’m close friend of her brothers, just so you know), and yet she let that guy fuck her in theirs last month of relationship. This whole situation just makes me feel like an idiot for waiting so long, and sometimes I cannot help myself when thinking about it. Should I speak to her about this ? Am I an idiot for waiting so long ? If someone had/having similar situation, how do you deal/dealt with it ? I’m really confused about my feelings, and as I said before, sometimes I just cannot help myself. Sometimes I even think that it would be better to broke up, just so I can finally stop felling like an idiot for my morals, and don’t have to worry about this with my future partners. So please, if someone has some advice to give - drop it. Thanks.

TLDR, I was always withholding about sex, just to have it with the right person, and for some reason expected that person to have the same mindset about this, and of course she didn’t. How do I stop feel like and idiot for waiting so long ? And how do I stop blaming her for not waiting ?



Submitted March 30, 2020 at 12:05AM

How do you deal with this ?Yo guys, I’m male, 21 y.o. This must be pretty common, but since I haven’t found any answer to this yet, I still wanna ask you about this one. So okay, let’s do it. So I’m dating this girl for 2 years now (she is 20), and I must say she is pretty much what I was looking for. But there is one thing that is bothering me, and I cannot let it go, her fucking EX. You see, I’m that kind of a guy that is very serious about relationships and I never had sex with a girl when I wasn’t sure she is the one for me. With this one however I felt different, felt like things might work out, and they pretty much did, so after half a year of dating I decided that we can actually make it happen. I was a virgin at a time, and of course I had to fucking ask (still regret asking) if she had any sexual partners before. Well she did. Just one. I know, that having sex is normal, but this annoying thought that I had waited and she didn’t is bothering me since then. What makes me feel even worse is that her previous relationship was very abusive, and I know this not only from her, but also from her brothers and her friends (I’m close friend of her brothers, just so you know), and yet she let that guy fuck her in theirs last month of relationship. This whole situation just makes me feel like an idiot for waiting so long, and sometimes I cannot help myself when thinking about it. Should I speak to her about this ? Am I an idiot for waiting so long ? If someone had/having similar situation, how do you deal/dealt with it ? I’m really confused about my feelings, and as I said before, sometimes I just cannot help myself. Sometimes I even think that it would be better to broke up, just so I can finally stop felling like an idiot for my morals, and don’t have to worry about this with my future partners. So please, if someone has some advice to give - drop it. Thanks.TLDR, I was always withholding about sex, just to have it with the right person, and for some reason expected that person to have the same mindset about this, and of course she didn’t. How do I stop feel like and idiot for waiting so long ? And how do I stop blaming her for not waiting ?
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