I [F19] hate my ex [M17] but can't avoid him and it's causing me distress

I [F19] broke up with my ex [M17] about 6 months ago and since then have felt overwhelming annoyance and I guess hatred for him. I won't go into detail on that, but my question is this;

Because of how I feel about him I obviously never want to speak to, see or even think about him. However it's really difficult as we are part of the same group of friends and so I can't avoid him. I want to block him on every form of social media, but if I do this, I either leave behind all my friends (one of whom is my best friend) or I make things awkward with our group.

I don't know what to do cause I love my friends, but he makes everything horrible, at least on my part. These friends don't really like him that much either, but no one wants to be the one who says something.

It also doesn't help that the friend group was originally his and I joined them last before dating him. This makes me feel like I should just cut ties with them even if it'll break my heart losing my best friend and all my other friends because they were his friends first.

I haven't told him about how I feel cause he's overly sensitive, in an unstable place (or at least was when I broke up with him) and he's just really hard to talk to.

The thing is, it's not just that I hate him, but also that every time I see his username or even his actual name I instantly get thrown into a depressed mood (I've been struggling with mental health since I was 12). It's really horrible as I'm almost free of my depression, but anything that reminds me of him brings it back.

I'm stuck, please help...

TL;DR - I hate my ex but can't avoid him and it's causing me distress. Do I leave my friends, do I just block him and see what happens or do I attempt to talk to him?



Submitted November 24, 2019 at 11:28PM

I [F19] broke up with my ex [M17] about 6 months ago and since then have felt overwhelming annoyance and I guess hatred for him. I won't go into detail on that, but my question is this;Because of how I feel about him I obviously never want to speak to, see or even think about him. However it's really difficult as we are part of the same group of friends and so I can't avoid him. I want to block him on every form of social media, but if I do this, I either leave behind all my friends (one of whom is my best friend) or I make things awkward with our group.I don't know what to do cause I love my friends, but he makes everything horrible, at least on my part. These friends don't really like him that much either, but no one wants to be the one who says something.It also doesn't help that the friend group was originally his and I joined them last before dating him. This makes me feel like I should just cut ties with them even if it'll break my heart losing my best friend and all my other friends because they were his friends first.I haven't told him about how I feel cause he's overly sensitive, in an unstable place (or at least was when I broke up with him) and he's just really hard to talk to.The thing is, it's not just that I hate him, but also that every time I see his username or even his actual name I instantly get thrown into a depressed mood (I've been struggling with mental health since I was 12). It's really horrible as I'm almost free of my depression, but anything that reminds me of him brings it back.I'm stuck, please help...TL;DR - I hate my ex but can't avoid him and it's causing me distress. Do I leave my friends, do I just block him and see what happens or do I attempt to talk to him?
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