My fiancé (m38) has no patience with me (f35) and I’m scared

I feel so trapped. I’m pregnant and we are getting married this year. Most of the time we have a lot of fun and he is so good to me but then he is so impatient.

Even his mum told me early on about his impatience and his friends say it too. I can’t drive yet so he drives me around a lot. I never demand things but ask if I can have a lift somewhere. The public transport around our area is not good so if I have to go further I need a lift. He does not complain and I do feel bad (I’m working on getting my license)

He gets really grumpy when he is tired, he is a shift worker and of course that is a full on job. But even on his days off he would stay up to the early hours of the morning and if he has to get up he is grumpy.

I’m worried with a baby coming along that he will lose his shit because of it.

A few weeks ago he lost it at me because he drove me to the mall and I couldn’t find anything that I liked. The thing is, I wanted to go to another mall but he asked if we can go to this one as it has food that he likes. So I couldn’t find anything. He was so angry and said he just goes in and knows what he wants. I honestly couldn’t find what I wanted.

I went to do my first test for my learner license and failed a few questions. I didn’t study as much as I also have assessments and I was more worried about not passing the eye test as ten years ago I failed due to not having strong enough contact lenses. Part of me just kind of expected not to get this far. He was so upset that he wasted his time driving me there because I failed. I was just so happy that I passed the eye test perfectly and that it meant that I can actually drive. I did get my learners the next day after retaking the test. But I was upset the whole day with his outburst.

I asked him today to have a lift to the post office so I can collect a parcel. I could have walked but wouldn’t have made it back home in time for my first driving lesson.

He stayed up to 5am playing video games and he said he would drive me. He woke up alright and we were joking around and I put the blinds up. He yelled at me to put them down and I put them half way down so my cat can look out. Hardly any sun came through but he got angry.

He drove me in silence to the post office and is now in bed again on a very nice day.

Honestly, as much as I love him I’m so unhappy now. I don’t deserve this. When he yelled at me for failing my license the first time I said ‘do I ever yell at you like this ?’ And he said ‘no, because I don’t fail you all the time’

I can move back with my mum but what do I do ? His family has more money that me what if they take my baby ? My mum lives in a two bedroom apartment and currently my fiancé and I live in a huge house in a nice neighbourhood and his parents are rich. My mum and I are certainly not.

When times are good they are soo good but with times like this I just want to cry. He got angry at me the other day because he was tired from work and I was stressing about the wedding (so far I’ve been emailing all the vendors and organising things) he apologised later but then he does it again.

Tl:dr my fiancé has no patience and let’s it out on me and I feel like it is all my fault

Submitted September 06, 2019 at 11:29PM

I feel so trapped. I’m pregnant and we are getting married this year. Most of the time we have a lot of fun and he is so good to me but then he is so impatient.Even his mum told me early on about his impatience and his friends say it too. I can’t drive yet so he drives me around a lot. I never demand things but ask if I can have a lift somewhere. The public transport around our area is not good so if I have to go further I need a lift. He does not complain and I do feel bad (I’m working on getting my license)He gets really grumpy when he is tired, he is a shift worker and of course that is a full on job. But even on his days off he would stay up to the early hours of the morning and if he has to get up he is grumpy.I’m worried with a baby coming along that he will lose his shit because of it.A few weeks ago he lost it at me because he drove me to the mall and I couldn’t find anything that I liked. The thing is, I wanted to go to another mall but he asked if we can go to this one as it has food that he likes. So I couldn’t find anything. He was so angry and said he just goes in and knows what he wants. I honestly couldn’t find what I wanted.I went to do my first test for my learner license and failed a few questions. I didn’t study as much as I also have assessments and I was more worried about not passing the eye test as ten years ago I failed due to not having strong enough contact lenses. Part of me just kind of expected not to get this far. He was so upset that he wasted his time driving me there because I failed. I was just so happy that I passed the eye test perfectly and that it meant that I can actually drive. I did get my learners the next day after retaking the test. But I was upset the whole day with his outburst.I asked him today to have a lift to the post office so I can collect a parcel. I could have walked but wouldn’t have made it back home in time for my first driving lesson.He stayed up to 5am playing video games and he said he would drive me. He woke up alright and we were joking around and I put the blinds up. He yelled at me to put them down and I put them half way down so my cat can look out. Hardly any sun came through but he got angry.He drove me in silence to the post office and is now in bed again on a very nice day.Honestly, as much as I love him I’m so unhappy now. I don’t deserve this. When he yelled at me for failing my license the first time I said ‘do I ever yell at you like this ?’ And he said ‘no, because I don’t fail you all the time’I can move back with my mum but what do I do ? His family has more money that me what if they take my baby ? My mum lives in a two bedroom apartment and currently my fiancé and I live in a huge house in a nice neighbourhood and his parents are rich. My mum and I are certainly not.When times are good they are soo good but with times like this I just want to cry. He got angry at me the other day because he was tired from work and I was stressing about the wedding (so far I’ve been emailing all the vendors and organising things) he apologised later but then he does it again.Tl:dr my fiancé has no patience and let’s it out on me and I feel like it is all my fault