My (48F) bf (48M) has open invitation to my home and kids but I am not offered the same. We have been dating 3 years. For the last year he sleeps at my house except for when he has his kids. Those times he stays at his house. I am not given the open invitation to his house. I have been around his kids very little. He has been around mine quite often due to him staying here at night. When he is with his kids we have little contact. He may text but only calls when they are not around (18 &16). I answer his calls in the presence of my kids as I see no reason not to. If I am invited to a family gathering it is only when my daughter is not with me. She is 14 but his kids have not made her feel welcome in the past. They ignore her. He says it's just awkward for his kids and doesnt want them to feel uncomfortable. I feel like my home and bed is like a hotel room to him for free. He does not provide any financial support and nor would I ever ask him as I am self-supporting just giving...

I met a 40M at a networking event. The strange thing is, he would only see me for an hour, two hours at a time on the weekday. On the weekend he says he's got plans with a "friend" Saturday night. This past week, he had the nerve to setup a short date, texting me the morning of to see him in the evening. He doesn't mention what he did last weekend etc so to me it's really obvious he's seeing someone else. ​ I feel like I am being put on the back burner in case whoever it is he's spending his weekends with doesn't work out. This guy made me pay for my own coffee the last three times we met and he complained about the cost of his own coffee. I don't know if I should just not see him anymore because after three dates I'm starting to get irritated at being the backup. I feel like I'm not even worth a $3 cup of coffee to spend time with. That I'm just someone he schedules a date with day of because he probably got a reply back to confirm ...

When I start talking with a guy I usually give us up to 2 weeks to go on our first date. Otherwise, I move on because I am not interested in having an online/text only relationship. I’m curious do others do this? If so, what is your time limit? Submitted June 30, 2019 at 11:32PM When I start talking with a guy I usually give us up to 2 weeks to go on our first date. Otherwise, I move on because I am not interested in having an online/text only relationship. I’m curious do others do this? If so, what is your time limit?

I have been having such a hard time dating lately and have been craving real physical, emotional, and mental connection. But I just don’t feel like I am putting that out there. My ex boyfriend (relationship ended 10 years ago, but we have remained best friends since) is currently on a mental breakdown trip, living out of his sprinter van and climbing rocks around the country. He’s currently in my city. Last night, his family came to visit so I went out with them. We got drunk at the bars and enjoyed the night. I hadn’t laughed so hard in awhile. My ex and his brother love me for who I am, so I was my full confident self. I very easily could have taken my Uber home when the bars closed. Instead, I went back to the van with my ex and continued the high. Continued feeling like the girl I feel like I’ve lost through the hardships of dating. We stayed up near the lake and put our feet in the water. We talked about politics, how to make our world better, how dumb his current girlfriend i...

A bit of background. I 32F gotten dumped after a whirlwind silly short romance, we met organically. A month and a half later, I decided to try old and I meet a decent dude online and we go out, 3x in a matter of 2 months. I wasn't giving off too many romantic vibes b/c honestly I think I was still getting over my ex. He could read the signals and messages me that he's sorry but he doesn't feel a connection, which I agreed with and we agreed to remain friends! fast forward 2 months later he texts me and asks how I am and we meet up for dinner and catch-up. During this time he said he is kinda seeing a girl, and has been for 6 weeks. 1 month after our catch-up he texts again and asks how i am doing and etc and then I asked him he wanted to catch-up this Sat. he said "Me and Jess have plans, but how about Sunday?" I was busy, I have a trip planned next week for a couple weeks and so I told him to have a great weekend and well catchup next time. To be honest I ...

Hey, I'm guessing there's not many Aussie female reditors on here but I'm happy with something naughty online. Whether that be flirting, creating a connection, or more. I'll shared details once we chat. I'm 30 Caucasian professional, fit(ish), funny and nice . I'm open to all times of women- any age above 18, any race, background, faith or martial status I do like to chat and flirt to women of other races, e.g. Chinese, Indian, African-American etc.  So bonus points if your one of those. I would like to build that first connection on here, then see how we go. Looking forward to hearing from you Submitted July 01, 2019 at 12:24AM Hey, I'm guessing there's not many Aussie female reditors on here but I'm happy with something naughty online. Whether that be flirting, creating a connection, or more. I'll shared details once we chat. I'm 30 Caucasian professional, fit(ish), funny and nice .I'm open to all times of women- any age above...

Every oppressed group has members who want to exclude some subset from the group because they don’t think they’re “oppressed enough”. There’s probably aces who think grays or demis or aegos “aren’t really ace”. It’s impossible to define a group narrowly and completely enough to prevent this kind of argument because everyone is at least a little bit different. There’s always a way to find a disqualifying condition if you want to. That may be the biggest problem with labels: they encapsulate and amplify differences, which gives power to those who crave to exclude. July 01, 2019 at 12:23AM

I think I was 13 when I did it the first time. I don't know why I did it then but now it's mostly for either wasting time or wasting energy so I can sleep July 01, 2019 at 12:20AM

I’ve been wanting to take my daughter to a baseball game because my dad used to take me and it was such a great memory. I’ve been a huge baseball fan all my life and I want to have that quibtessial dad-daughter bonding time with her so I can show her my interests. My wife wants to come too and won’t let me take her to her first baseball game just the two of us. My wife likes baseball and watches with me, but isn’t anywhere near as big of a fan as I am. I don’t see why she cares that much. I want this to be my thing with my daughter and my wife can have her own thing. I wouldn’t interfere with her teaching my daughter about makeup so I don’t get why she wants to interfere with introducing her to baseball. How can I make my wife see that this is important to me and that she should let me have this one? TL;DR I’m a huge baseball fan and my wife is barely a fan, but she insists on imposing on my daughter’s first baseball game even though it’s important to me to have it be just us. How d...

So last week I [27M] met a girl [27F] at a speed dating event. We matched, and I sent her a text the day after, asking her out. She said yes and we originally planned on it being this Monday. However, two days agoI texted her a place to have dinner at and she let me know that she actually had to work Monday, asking what other day would work for me. So we agreed on Wednesday. I then sent her a follow up message asking if the original place I had planned for was still fine for Wed, and I haven't had a response from her since (to confirm this place). It's been two days now and it seems that the first date isn't going to happen. Would you recommend "confirming" the day of still - or just let her have the follow up text at any point before Wednesday night? ​ tl;dr: planned a first date with a girl but haven't received a "confirm" text from her, so I don't think the date is happening. Submitted June 30, 2019 at 11:54PM So last week I [27M] met...

I broke up with him due to his debilitating depression, anxiety, and irritability, which affected how he acted (or didn't act) in our relationship. The long distance made things infinitely more difficult. Even after breaking up, I still "stuck around" for a month, communicating with him (he always initiated, and I responded). It got too unhealthy, draining and painful, that I finally mustered up the courage to block him, after our final fight. Two days, later, I receive emails from him -- walls of texts. The main theme was that he was sorry, that he didn't realize what he had until it was gone, that he'd change, and that he'd do anything to have me back. However, some things in the email jumped out at me and I need objective, 3rd party opinions: "My life is not worth living without you. Without you I am an empty shell slowly becoming a grumpy man who hates the world because the world didn't treat him right." "I know you were the last ch...

I've had problems with getting my mom to help me with most of my problems for pretty much my whole life. I've never considered her a person to go to for support. She's always been pretty distant, but I don't mind because I understand that she has really severe depression plus I'm a very antisocial person. This has become a major issue in my life, however, over the past 2 years or so. I started really being upset by this when I was put into inpatient treatment for anorexia at the end of 2017. My mom was very helpful when it comes to taking me to my treatment and all the doctors appointments I had, but whenever she was supposed to get actively involved (like attending group therapy) she'd find some reason to not show up. My mom is a single mother and works really hard, so I thought she'd just not show up to our group therapy because she was tired, but then I heard her talking on the phone with a friend trying to come up with reasons to skip because she felt ...

Hi all, I've (30f) been friends with this guy Garrett (30m) for 4 years and recently we changed the nature of our relationship and we're romantically involved now for about 3 months. Everything is going really well, he treats me really great and we have a solid friendship and common interests. The problem is that he has struggled with mental illness and addiction problems for many years. Sometimes he's doing well and staying sober with a stable job and other times he goes back to drinking and not working, etc. That being said, he has a habit of lying about a lot of things, sometimes serious stuff (whether he's sober or not) and sometimes insignificant stuff. The lying is the only thing that has really been a red flag. He's never once been abusive or any of the things that people associate with addiction and mental illness. He has been in and out of therapy since be was a teenager and he wants to do better as well. Most people tell me outright that it's no...

Long-time reader first-time poster. I have been thinking a lot over the last several months about the question posed in the title, so much so that I created this account earlier this morning just to make this post and see what other people thought. As the title suggests, I have never dated. Let me give you some background information as it may be helpful in discussion; I apologize in advance for the length. I am a male, just turned 28 years-old, and will be graduating from medical school next month. This has been a matter that is one part personal choice and another the result of circumstance: I didn’t date in high school because I valued my independence and recognized that I did not have the patience for high school relationship drama. I didn’t date while at university because college was my ticket to med school, which meant long hours of studying and volunteering. I also did not live on campus for two main reasons: 1) my scholarship covered everything except housing and, more import...

TL;DR - I have been moving fast with my current long distance girlfriend and have anxiety every week or so that she does not feel the same way despite daily reassurance without my asking. I want to take a few days without talking to her, but I am not sure if that is the right way to approach this, especially since she returns home in a week. ​ I met my current girlfriend about two months ago, and we couldn't stop hanging out after the first time we were together. We were only together for about two weeks before she had to leave to visit her family for a month in Brazil (we both live in the US currently). She told me she wanted to be exclusive before she left and I agreed. She gets back in a week now, and we have talked everyday a bunch since she had been away. I feel like we have only gotten closer since she has been away. I really miss her despite only knowing her for such a short time, and she always tells me she misses me as well. We told one another that we loved each other....

Welcome to the fckn magic show. 2 years, engaged, threw me out of my own apartment in january, fucked countless girls since, while using me as well. I have been doing my best to forget this person, and move on. I just put my two weeks in at the job I work, which is his family's business. I cannot work there anymore, as he shows up and makes it clear his only motive is to hurt me. Let's see, in the beginning of June, he was trying to get with his brother's ex girlfriend after sucking me back in with those fake promises and fake declarations of love. He's already on girl number 3, in a matter of weeks. Priceless.. I have since ran for my life from him. I was done. He has since texted me from different phone numbers and made a fake Instagram and Twitter to harass me. His texts: "I wouldn't be able to trust anyone either after all things I did to you, so I understand." and when I did not reply, "Fuck you." Two days later: "I need my wake...

I’ve been with my girlfriend for a few months now and I’ve always been aware of her mental health issues. She has bipolar disorder and suffers from a lot of trauma from her previous relationships. These issues haven’t been a problem for me as I have had some experience with people with similar issues. Recently it’s gotten quite concerning recently with her becoming unmotivaed and thinking that there’s no point to her life, practically bordering suicidal. I take school and college very seriously and I would consider myself a very motivated person. I’ve tried to get her to register for classes at her local college but she refuses saying it’s a waste of money and that there’s no point. I know this isn’t best for her I don’t want her to be stuck in her small town for the rest of her life and neither does she. She refuses all advice I give her and refuses to see help again thinking it’s all a waste. At first I was annoyed since I can’t stand people who waste their potential and don’t do an...

Ok, so my girlfriend and I used to be best friends going for about 4 years. I asked her out about 4 times during those four years. We've tried to separate (as friends) but we just kept coming back to eachother. I only kept asking her out because I felt like she was super into me- especially when she told me straight up that she wouldnt mind if I had sex with her with a strap-on. But she never really wanted a relationship with me. I was struggling with depression and insecurities, so I definitely am a part of the cause of how diffuctional our friendship was. I thought she was into me, I asked her out, she regected me, I fell apart, she got a bit angry, and I left to find myself. This happened about 4 times in the same exact way. This last time, however, I put so much space between us (because I almost failed high school and with living on my own, I needed to get over her). We talked occasionally, but I stopped for the most part. Cue her messaging me randomly one day declaring her l...

I (25m) met this lovely woman (25f) in a speed dating event and we have a lot in common. However, after going on a date with her, I found that she has tattoos which I am not a fan of. How do I communicate to her that I can't simply date her simply because she has permanent tattoos? I think it would make me feel uncomfortable down the road. I don't want to ghost her. But I don't think I can hold my opinion to myself. It's going to be hard for me to think of her the same again. Submitted June 30, 2019 at 11:57PM I (25m) met this lovely woman (25f) in a speed dating event and we have a lot in common. However, after going on a date with her, I found that she has tattoos which I am not a fan of.How do I communicate to her that I can't simply date her simply because she has permanent tattoos? I think it would make me feel uncomfortable down the road. I don't want to ghost her. But I don't think I can hold my opinion to myself. It's going to be hard for...

My friend told me that a friend of his might be a good match for me. He told her a but about me and threw a Snapchat ID at me. All my past relationships have started with face-to-face interaction, so I'm not sure how to go into a cold conversation with someone I don't know. Help a brother out? Submitted July 01, 2019 at 12:08AM My friend told me that a friend of his might be a good match for me. He told her a but about me and threw a Snapchat ID at me. All my past relationships have started with face-to-face interaction, so I'm not sure how to go into a cold conversation with someone I don't know.Help a brother out?

So I recently matched with a girl online that I actually know and i've spoken with in person once at a festival. We had a nice 15 minute long conversation. This was 8 months ago. (She was taken at the time so I didn't make a move back then). ​ Now that we've been texting, she seems to have a very busy schedule and has cancelled 2 dates I tried to arrange so far within one week. This saturday and this sunday (today) . ​ We have been matched since last sunday and have been talking for exactly 1 week. Yesterday, she canceled because she said her car was in the shop and she didn't know how long it would take so she asked if we could move it to today to be safe (even though I offered to drive us both previously). ​ So today when I followed up with her before the date, she didn't respond to the text I sent 6 hours ago that was asking if she was still available to go out tonight. normally she responds within an hour, 2 hours max on one occasion. But something must s...

You are doing great, sweetie July 01, 2019 at 12:01AM

The “het” is short for heterosexual which by its very definition anyone who is ace is not. The thing is that het can also be defined as hetero-orientated, and some heteroromantic asexuals do use that definition and adopt the usage of cishet as their id. None of that is a issue. The real issue is that some people block lgbtq resources for hetero-orientated aces that needs it. June 30, 2019 at 11:59PM

My friend (28yF) met a guy online. A couple of weeks into dating, he shared that he is moving across the US for his job. By a month in to dating he set the expectation that she would be moving with him in August (12 weeks from starting to date) if all works out. He says he doesnt expect her to move without a ring. He has plans to have kids, live on the ocean, have separate bank accounts), etc. These conversations were all before I met the guy around week 4 of them dating. He invited her to travel to Europe for 2 weeks, 6weeks in to dating. She went. Her feedback to me was that they did some amazing things, but she was super up and down with him and did want more alone time than they had. Before meeting her BF (33yM), I learned that my friend was super hopeful that this could workout despite how crazy fast things would move. My friend said she would move for someone she loves, but she wasnt "there" yet. She shared with me all if his ideas for the future, which felt very much...

25M, I just started working in the hospital and am on the same team as this girl 27F who after a week, I’ve developed a crush on. But being residents in a hospital, we are both constantly on the go, with each other 12 hours a day, and there isn’t true down time other than do housekeeping data entry at the computers. I strongly dislike making small talk but I haven’t really had a chance to have an engaging conversation with this girl other than a handful of times. She’ll ask me how my day is going and other things about my goals and things I like. She also asked me if I was going to work social this week which I told her I wasn’t going to be at. We’ve been joking around and teasing each other. She seems like a very genuine and kind girl so I’m thinking that she’s just being friendly right now. Is there anyway I can legitimately get to know her without messing with our professional relationship right now? TL;DR- I’ve developed a crush on my coresident who I’ve started working with this...

This is a throwaway, and the post will be long so please bear with me. I'd also like some advice from Asians/South Asians if possible because this may be cultural as well. I graduated from well-known college near my home town about a month ago. I was a commuter student and graduated a year early, so the only time where I wasn't completely living at home was my last semester which I compromised for with some other things. It was only in the last year of college where I really started making friends and having more kickbacks, and just doing more things in general. For context, I went to my first concert back in October and was allowed to go to another state for a weekend with my friends with just us. Even then, my parents liked doing random drop-ins to my apartment or when I was walking back home from class at around 8-9 pm, which honestly annoyed me because I had specifically requested they only come when I ask them to. I've recently moved back into my parents' house ...

A few times now my younger sister has organised some sort of catch up event (e.g. brunch, dinner, movies) with myself and our other sister [21F]. Every single time when it comes to pay and they ask if we’re paying all together, she doesn’t jump in and say we’re splitting the bill but just looks at me to pay. She’s organised for us to go to the movies tonight and then just texted us saying ‘does someone want to book the tickets?’ as though she can’t do it herself. The thing is, I generally don’t mind paying if that expectation wasn’t there. And sometimes, these meals just add up and it would be good if they paid for their own food sometimes too! I’m not sure what to do without coming across rude. Currently I’m ignoring her text message about booking the movie tickets but that doesn’t really address the problem. It’s not so much that she’s not paying for herself, but that expectation (and the fact that she never directly ASKS but just implies it) that I pay makes me feel like I’m jus...

Ok so I really struggled to find a title for this mess, because that‘s what it is - a big mess. But I‘ll try to exlpain it as good as I can. Just a few things before I start: - First love / husband I will refer to as DH (M/24) - internet love i will refer as IL (M/24) - I‘m 23 and female - English is not my first language so sorry in advance Soo my story begins with in 2012 with 16 year old mee crazyyy falling in love for the very first time. It was crazy and all-consuming. I saw him, looked him in the eyes and just knew in my deepest heart that I will someday marry this boy before even knowing his name or anything who he is. So in my culture there is no such thing as boyfriend girlfriend, if you are seen out in public together you‘re basically engaged. So we did everything we could to hide our relationship. We had a long-distance relationship after the first 6 months and I would say it became rough after that- because it always was. But thats another thing. So what had to happene...